TH3J35T3R is Completely Irrelevant

th3j35t3r is a weak, impotent jingoist bitch.

Lacking the necessary skills required to hack and deface the glorious and infallible Chronicle.SU, th3j35t3r resorted to snitching to our web host’s Twitter account, thinking they would share her butthurt after we reported what an impotent dick she is. Nice “hacking” Jester.

The Jester is only capable of attacking outmoded Apache servers based in the Third World. This is why she carved a niche attacking Jihadist websites. Because Islamic extremists hate technology, they don’t even use websites, but they know a guy who, for a wheelbarrow of opium, will throw something together on Apache 1.0.

The Jester attacks these sites using XerXes, some piece of shit offshoot of a real program called SlowLoris, which requires no computer skills and only a basic knowledge of websites to operate. XerXes is so easy, a caveman could abuse it.

XerXes just serves to provide the Jester with a lame hobby – some superficial claim to fame that, in a best case scenario, might get that pussy wet if she knows how to brag to drunk easy kills at the nearby drunkhouse. But we have it on good faith that, contrary to popular belief she is a female, the Jester is a bald middle-aged male who masturbates to child porn on the darknet. However, the presumption that th3j35t3r possesses the technological prowess to navigate the darknet is far-fetched.

The Jester is not helping anybody. He’s only hurting people. If this is funny, then you are a dick, like the Jester. Which is totally cool, but still. You’re a dick. And The Jester is a narc.

3 comments to TH3J35T3R is Completely Irrelevant

Leave a Reply

  

  

  

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>