JACKSONVILLE, FLA. – Speaking from the deck of his personal boat, Tea Party Candidate for President Grady Warren, who received an early 2011 endorsement from The Internet Chronicle , outlined a daring plan to fight big government. Through the instatement of “re-education camps” targeted at at-risk members of the youth population too ne’er-do-well to serve as janitors in their high schools, Mr. Warren’s plan will see a brighter future.
“That future is out there,” said Mr. Warren. “It is waiting for us. Our children deserve it. Our nation depends on it. The peace and freedom of the world require it. And with your help we will deliver it. Let us begin that future for America tonight.”
The National Education Association, he explained on his fishing vessel, “Little Skippy,” is in fact a money-laundering criminal organization, a tyrannical behemoth serving as the iron fist of the virtually omnipotent teachers’ lobby. Over the course of President Obama’s first term public school teachers have seen their collective bargaining rights enhanced and expanded, and their nominal salaries rise to levels unseen since the close of World War II. U.S. schools currently pay teachers exorbitantly, with compensation and pensions far higher than in any other industrialized nation.
Speaking in a comfortable pair of shoes from a Madison, Wisconsin picket line February 17, 2011 President Obama expounded upon his own proto-fascist ideology: “The United States is the greatest nation on earth. Therefore as long as I am its president its teachers will receive no salary, no wage lower than any other nation’s.”
Mr. Warren’s visionary plan, endorsed by North Carolina State Professor Kamau Kambon and Democratic Strategist Melissa Harris-Perry, would pulverize the NEA’s unholy jackboot at the tarsals. The five-point Warren plan for Small-Government Education Success is simple:
1. Re-open military bases and allow any serviceman or servicewoman forced away post-BRAC to return to the more convenient location.
2. Utilize 2010 census data to locate households containing (or likely to shield) impoverished teenage or young adult black males.
3. Conduct a poll of the Tea Party Caucus mailing list of Representative Michele Bachmann (R-MN) on the nature of what constitutes an “American man” and have the Defense Department develop a curriculum based on these scientific findings.
4. Use the new, improved National Defense Authorization Act’s powers to detain all targets.
5. Transfer all targets to the re-education centers, each target’s designated center decided by lottery.
Mr. Warren’s five-point plan, which Redditors have likened to the plot of “Bioshock Infinite,” undermined Mitt Romney’s southern strategy throughout the summer. Mississippi Republican voters, for instance, of whom a plurality are opposed to the legality of interracial marriage, were seduced by the Tea Party candidate’s smoother hair and moral fortitude. “We were worried when we heard Mr. Romney was wearing that blackface on Univision,” said Gloria Porter, 29, of Jackson. Her husband, Bobby Porter, his crossed arms moving abruptly between her and this reporter, said he was concerned that Mr. Romney was encouraging “race-mixing.”
As a consequence of the poll damage Anonymous candidate Grady Warren was doing in the South, Mr. Romney released four attack ads that targeted Mr. Warren’s plan to entice legally present ethnic minorities into sanctuary cities. Bill Murphy, social media director for the Romney campaign who has previously warned Americans about the oncoming black-on-white race war, told The Washington Times September 22 that Mr. Warren’s plan to actually offer cash assistance to “incent the lowest rungs of the 47 percent rabble” was barely an improvement on President Obama’s own wealth redistribution schemes. Added Mr. Murphy, “Americans aren’t fooled by the Warren bait-and-switch of offering security while encumbering job creators with these cash allowances, which are extracted through force. Why should Americans have to pay the race pimps and class warriors to go away?”
In April 2011 Grady Warren received The Internet Chronicle’s endorsement after he made clear that America’s wealthiest are not only powerfully independent and self-sustaining but also victims of everyone else.
President Barack Hussein Obama II, whom the ivory tower elites have designated to glide to victory on the backs of the Houston chapter of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, may be able to rig enough electronic voting machines in Ohio, Colorado, Florida, Virginia and Pennsylvania. But Real America will know that Mitt Romney was the real winner.
Larry Sabato, director of the University of Virginia Center for Politics, said Monday it is possible that Republican Presidential Nominee Mitt Romney may very well win the popular vote, as Al Gore did in 2000, while ultimately losing the electoral vote. “Abercrombie & Fitch clothiers throughout the greater Los Angeles metropolitan area,” he said, “are bracing for hordes of Caucasian looters and rioters.” Korean American proprietors of free-standing Disney Stores are taking special precautions, knowing that European Americans may prove not only zealous, but also sufficiently well-armed, to attempt to make off with golden era anti-Semitic merchandise from the “Disney Vault.”
After an embarrassingly forced visit to a soup kitchen, Paul Ryan failed to accrue more votes for himself and aspiring war criminal Mitt Romney.
On his way out, Ryan encountered a free black man. Ryan then demanded the Uncle Tom’s name, but refused to stop and talk with him.
Bill Murray is also known for “crashing parties” by showing up to wash random homeowners’ dishes, but Paul Ryan has found that a demeaning tone, paired with not actually washing any dishes, goes over just as well as he doesn’t care that day about anything going on around him.
“I’m Paul Ryan. Glad to meet you.”
“Glad to meet you too.”
Born and raised here, are you really? Cool. I’m from a town, similar, called Weansley.
Similar to what?
Ryan walks away while the man was still talking to him.
Increasingly, all people are being turned into objects. This is more than a gender issue. This is the death of the Subject. Nobody has truly come to grips with the horrible alienation of Social Media. On r/creepshots, people have entered a sick feedback loop that we all know ends with ragdoll porn and sex doll necrorape fantasy. Sure it’s legal, but so is investigating the identities of the people who moderate it.[pullquote]“What kind of person would want to sit around and moderate Reddit all day?” ~ Viciously Raped Sex Doll[/pullquote]
Adrian Chen is a dickhead who constantly steals his ideas from Chronicle.SU, and Gawker is a piece-of-shit tabloid, but Violentacrez, a person who didn’t even take elementary precautions to protect his identity, cannot be doxed. Just because he’s your friend and he’s being attacked by a tabloid doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice the freedom of speech.
In this day and age it’s so common for meaning to be inverted by a small group of people who control media. Just look at the way Christians claim that abortion is an affront to religious freedom. Censoring Gawker in the name of freedom of speech is the same thing. Your bff, Violentacrez, might have been unfairly treated by someone trolling for tabloid hits, but is the answer really abusing your power to censor an entire media outlet? Why’d you even bother with the SOPA blackout?
I’ve had my run-ins with Reddit Moderators in the past. In fact, Chronicle.SU is banned from r/politics. By banning Gawker, a small group of people have ONCE AGAIN proven they are merciless tyrants.
Self-appointed, self-medicating “leader of Anonymous” Barrett Brown was heard struggling against intruders Wednesday, hump day, September 12. Sources confirmed Thursday morning Brown is sitting in a Dallas jail.
Brown’s credibility came under scrutiny after Kilgore Trout tricked Brown into believing he was actually talking to Amber Lyon, a dipshit CNN correspondent. Brown subsequently accused Trout via Twitter of having sex with his girlfriend marking a gradual, but distinct dissolution of sanity and reason which ultimately led Brown to make threats against FBI agents, presumably prompting the raid.
Wednesday’s raid signifies the last nail in the crystal coffin of Brown’s otherwise transient career. Brown was recently heard ranting against all things in a telephone call with Topiary, the actual leader of anonymous. Brown has also appeared in videos making delusional claims provoked by unseen sources of paranoia.
Barrett Brown is the glorified blogger who once belonged to the underground hacker group Anonymous and, for a while, got to decide who gets to join anonymous and who does not. Chronicle.su, he said, is not anonymous, like himself, Barrett Brown – or similarly, Sabu.
Brown, below, threatens the FBI with an ultimatum
Brown describes the purpose of Project PM to be “wiping out this fucking government” and “certain media publications” (chronicle.su maybe? We definitely know he means the NY Times)
Sources discuss chronicle.su and make threats against her glorious staff of anti-leaders
Why? Why is chronicle.su this hateful black enterprise I can not even stand to look at anymore? Why do I no longer like this place?
Seriously, I’m about to pull a Geo because there are just too many bad vibes around this hate hole. I’m sending up a distress flare because I don’t know what else to do anymore. I’m no longer funny, this website isn’t funny, we are just hurtful abusive people with no respect for dead children or their grieving families.
I used to think chronicle.su was a bottomless source of ironic lies but now I’m not so confident in that assertion. Sure, there are 35 people staring at DEAD LIL WAYNE at any given moment, but it’s not like they can read anyway or else they would already know he is “alive,” whatever you take that to mean . . . But I’m not talking about just trying to make the a sound for apple and pronouncing cat, but really reading – and comprehending – the world around them.
Literate individuals don’t fall for LIL WAYNE DEAD and park on the webpage all day, and spread it around without checking other sources. Okay, dying AIDS-infected Africans were crossing the Sahara to register their grievances at the metropolis internet cafe. So what chronicle.su has proven to me in the last nine months is worse than anything I could have ever imagined without performing this experiment for myself:
1. There are more stupid people than statistics could possibly account for, and yet I’m astounded by the numbers.
It took “readers” an average of almost three minutes to determine how their favorite rapper actually died of AIDS before anyone knew he contracted it.
2. I am a toxin. If there’s anybody I can think of besides our last fourteen presidents who deserves brain cancer, it’s Lady GaGa for making anti-intellectualism appear sexy and appealing, and yet I am the one who made people cry announcing she has brain cancer.
But since I did it anyway, check out this video of the some little girl freaking out about it or something. Or don’t. Just go the fuck away now.
Lady Gaga! She wants to be like you when she grows up. A vapid, expressionless sellout! GOOD WORK, WHORE.
Nothing is funny anymore. Nothing is surprising. Anonymous is dead, and even that is kind of sad because it was so funny to watch internet losers migrate the handle from DDoSing Hal Turner, to blocking up a fake swimming pool in Habbo Hotel, to Scientology, and all the way back around again to DDoSing bank websites before finally getting arrested en masse. Yummy yummy honeypotty! Now we’re wasted, now we’re screwed. Now I’m bored. So what the fuck is next?
ANSWER: I don’t give a shit. I am going to lay it all right out for you. I know by now we have some fans (people who hate us are “fans,” too, by the way) and for some reason you keep coming back here to see if I replied to your meaningless comments, to see if your shitty, grammatical atrocities are making a difference on my own fake opinion (they don’t), because you might feel that you’ve somehow caused a tree to fall in the forest – and for everybody who heard it, no one paid attention. Not even me. Especially not me. And I am writing now to inform you– no, to ask of you– no . . . I am just writing. And that’s how it’s going to be. That’s what I’m laying down.
I’m a cunt sliver . . .
If you ever once came to this website and thought I was writing to you, for you, about you – even if I was – I don’t want your feedback. I’m a cunt sliver away from turning off all the comments, globally, and firing material into your blank eyes with NO POSSIBLE RECOURSE. ZERO. Because I’m tired of you. I’m tired of the pressure. I’m tired of this broken, hateful website, and I’m tired, most of all, of hating this place I (ironically) designed to be hated.
I’m DONE with it. I’m done with you festering, stinking maggots who sallow each article. I’m done with your cute usernames, multiple IP addresses, multiple fucking usernames, and every combination inbetween. I’m done with your tired little surmises. I’m done with your discussions. I’m done with the chat room, the radio show, and most importantly – in case I haven’t yet made it clear – I’m done with you.
FUCK THE READERSHIP. ALL OF YOU. MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS, MY LANDLORD – ESPECIALLY MY LANDLORD, HE IS A THIEVING CHARLATAN like the readers. I DON’T GIVE A FLYING HAT TRICK WHO YOU ARE. I AM FINISHED WITH ALL OF IT, AND THIS WEBSITE.
Sorel’s was a voluntarist Marxism: he rejected those Marxists who believed in inevitable and evolutionary change, emphasizing instead the importance of will and preferring direct action. These approaches included general strikes, boycotts, and constant disruption of capitalism with the goal being to achieve worker control over the means of production. Sorel’s belief in the need for a deliberately-conceived “myth” to sway crowds into concerted action was put into practice by mass fascist movements in the 1920s. The epistemic status of the idea of “myth” is of some importance, and is essentially that of a working hypothesis, with one fundamental peculiarity: it is an hypothesis which we do not judge by its closeness to a “Truth”, but by the practical consequences which stem from it. Thus, whether a political myth is of some importance or not must be decided, in Sorel’s view, on the basis of its capacity to mobilize human beings into political action; the only possible way for men to ascend to an ethical life filled by the character of the sublime and to achieve deliverance. Sorel believed the “energizing myth” of the general strike would serve to enforce solidarity, class consciousness and revolutionary élan amongst the working-class. The “myth” that the fascists would appeal to, however, was that of the race, nation, or people, as represented by the state.
Clearly, Occupy and Anonymous have enacted a myth in which a powerless government works under the yoke of a global corporate conspiracy to suppress 99% of the population while 1% lives in opulence. The not-so powerless “police state” is tracking all Internet communications globally and has virtual omnipresence, omniscience, and omnipotence. The core of this myth is that Democracy is dead, otherwise there would be no need for direct action. Chomsky, a stolid supporter, often describes this myth as “imagery.” It doesn’t do to tell a believer that, no, there is actually a much more complicated set of circumstances behind the perceived decay of American culture and economy, and the death of Democracy is only a part of a myth meant to bring about a global revolution.
Before going further, it’s helpful to take a look at another end of the “myth spectrum,” where America is the final bastion of freedom under constant threat of attack from government over-regulation, Mexican immigration, and Islamic terror. Quite obviously, this is much closer to the kind of myth fascists like Mussolini and Hitler employed. On the surface, this myth portrays a valorous Democracy standing in defiance to the forces of evil and terror, yet the siren call of its greatest adherents is really a funeral dirge for a Democracy that is already dead and must be revived through the act of voting.
This is not the world of Sorel or Mussolini, and there is not the same kind of disenfranchised laborers facing down despicable conditions imposed upon them by corporate overlords. Discontent, as expressed by Occupy and Anonymous, flows much more from a generalized feeling of dissatisfaction with simulacra than it does from actual economic repression. This manifests itself through wide-ranging general complaints against everything from environmental degradation to military imperialism, but it really flows from the culture’s inability to deal with media which presents increasingly falsified versions of reality.
The failure of Occupy to actualize the mythical revolution might be answered by Sorel with an adapted myth. Taking the successful twist employed by the right which promotes voting, even in the face of a “dead” Democracy, however, might require abandonment of the idea of revolution. Ideas, however, are plastic. Portraying voting as a truly revolutionary act, within the confines of the two-party system, is somewhat problematic, but not impossible to overcome. These confines, in any adapted myth, should be obliterated by new technology. The power of Social Media to draw huge amounts of publicity to those with no real financial backing is intensely important, potentially lending power to those who are not a part of either party.
But still, that is all a ridiculous dance in the world of fairy tales and simulacra. What is really needed is fundamental education about the myth itself. This is not just education, but meta-education. Not simply a prophylactic against misinformation and disinformation, as these are truly all that exists, but rather a collective self-awareness. It is not enough to know the way a politician will spin a yarn, or the way media will frame in bias. By self-awareness, I mean complete understanding that these are things we do ourselves, personally, every time we speak. To put the tendency for myth making on the “other” is yet another myth prone to all the grave consequences of violent Fascism. In short, Sorel’s view of the myth as the only way to inflict “ethical life” on the other is itself a myth.
Tweetspeak Translation: The Supreme Court of the United States has been knocked offline by Anonymous because of its decision on the Affordable Care Act, and Representative Dan Gordon has a raging hard-on because of it.
Thursday, the Supreme Court ruled that most provisions of the Affordable Care Act were constitutional, as the controversial “individual mandate” fell under the power of Congress to levy a tax. Apopleptic critics such as State Representative Dan Gordon got on Twitter to vent their frustrations and put their big stinkin’ feet right into their big stinkin’ mouths.
In the heat of The Dan Gordon’s rage over the Supreme Court decision, @YourAnonInc, a terribly obvious parody account openly controlled by Chronicle.SU, tweeted the following: “@RepDanGordon http://supremecourt.us #TangoDown Join #OpLiberty Please RT #Anonymous.” Dan’s response was a hasty retweet followed by an independent endorsement of the ongoing “operation.” There’s a lot of jargon here that might not make sense to those who aren’t involved in Twitter or Anonymous culture, so I’ll spell it out, especially for the Rhode Island State legislators who must be sick of this stain on their honor.
“Tango Down” is an expression popularized by “th3j35t3r,” which refers to a Distributed Denial of Service attack (DDoS), in which a web site is maliciously overloaded with traffic until it can no longer provide service. There were no DDoS attacks in response to the Supreme Court’s ruling, and http://supremecourt.us is a nonexistent web site. It is not even under the official .gov domain extension, another simple point that would have tipped off anyone with the least bit of web savvy. The hashtag #OpLiberty refers to the nonexistent group of people carrying out these nonexistent attacks on the nonexistent web site, which also serves as a hyperlink to their ongoing discussion. Had Gordon, or anyone, clicked that hyperlink, he would have instantly found that no such discussion exists.
Gordon’s incapacity to verify facts and simply use the Internet is frankly hilarious, but that’s a fairly common thing for legislators. It’s just not fair to expect people of his age to display a competent level of Internet savvy. While he does posture himself as a member of Anonymous, most have long known this to be a total front. What’s shocking is his ringing personal endorsement of what he thought was a cyberattack on the Supreme Court, the body directly responsible for ultimate interpretation of the laws he’s supposed to be legislating. It may have all been a pathetically simple ruse, but his intentions couldn’t have been more clear. Representative Dan Gordon has zero respect for the highest Judicial body in this country. Furthermore, he’d go so far as participating in attacks on their web site which, by their very nature, rely on promotion via social media.
Patriot hacktivist th3j35t3r is known for attacking WikiLeaks, Westboro Baptist Church, Anonymous, and the Internet Chronicle. In a recent blogpost by Reaper Security, which is incredibly well-cited, th3j35t3r’s methods are laid bare. As it appears, th3j35t3r’s biggest victories have all been either totally faked, the work of others, or ridiculous exaggerations. Reaper Security once allied themselves with th3j35t3r but have since stated, “Stop taking credit for things you didn’t do, start giving credit where credit is due, and we’ll shut up. I still consider you a friend, though if you wish to label me as an enemy as you did on your blog, then so be it.”
Th3j35t3r has built up a strong reputation for charlatanry, and his career bears a striking resemblance to Gregory D. Evans of Ligatt security. Attrition.org has compiled an extensive list of Gregory D. Evans’ alleged misdeeds. These include spamming campaigns, check fraud, the purchase of fake Twitter followers, cyber bullying, and most damning, extensive plagiarism. Simply put, Gregory D. Evans’ behavior is entirely consistent with th3j35t3r’s. This connection comes on the heels of a recent campaign naming Tom Ryan of Provide Security as th3j35t3r. An Anonymous security expert commented, “If Evans can get Ryan smeared as the Jester, that’s one less competitor for him.”
Hero for "The People" (notice, he is wearing black)
Marvin Heemeyer was an average citizen of Granby, Colorado, a very small town run by city officials who were out to get anyone they didn’t like. These power-hungry maniacs attacked anyone who wanted freedom, even using the local media to spread lies.
The city council rejected plans to hook Heemeyer’s shop up to sewer lines and fined him tens of thousands out of spite. He sought permission to build a new route to his muffler shop, even purchased a bulldozer to do this, and the city council rejected this plan, putting him out of business. Not one to be kept down, Heemeyer read a lot of Black Bloc propaganda and decided to take the path of non-violent coercion and self defense.
Heemeyer sold his shop and set to work planning for his one-man Black Bloc protest. Using extreme determination and grit, Heemeyer created the greatest defensive weapon a protester could hope for: A Komatsu D355A bulldozer with full plate steel reinforced concrete armor. By creating his own autonomous zone, where no fascistic riot police could repress his right to peaceful protest, Heemeyer was prepared to become Black Bloc’s most historic martyr.
Heemeyer painted his armored bulldozer black to signify his willingness to participate in property destruction as a form of protest.
Heemeyer took his heavily-modified protest Komatsu D355A and completely destroyed buildings which housed members of Granby’s anti-muffler-shop-industrial-complex. His first target, of course, was his own muffler shop, the heart of the conspiracy. After that, he hit the city hall, the local newspaper, the mayor’s house, and everyone who had been an enemy to liberty. However, Heemeyer remained totally non-violent through this entire encounter, firing only warning shots at police who came too close.
Of course, Heemeyer was totally suicidal. As soon as the armor was dropped onto the bulldozer, there was no way out except death. But did he have a choice, in the face of endless tyranny? Of course he did, but he used the horizontal organization model, so it was ethically right. Also, he didn’t actually kill anyone, so his non-violent diversity of tactics is to be applauded.
Let’s remember that Black Bloc is a tactic, and not a group, as that is an extremely important point in substantive discussion of this topic. A single person can create a fully autonomous zone and pull off perhaps the most effective Black Bloc protest of all time. Over $7 million in damages, you wanna talk about smashing the state?! WOW! There is no doubt, Marvin Heemeyer is Black Bloc’s greatest martyr.