Trail Boss Jamie Jo Corne Postpones "Bull Party"

The Bull Party is a rally to restore freedom, which involves dumping seeds on the capitol and turning loose “thousands” of heads of cattle in the city streets, heralded by Corne who is expected to arrive on horseback with The Articles of Separation in hand. . . .

Peter King To Rescue Fear-Gripped Midwest From Shariah Law

The only “serious” differences in fundie types are alterations in the underlying cartoon narrative of anthropology, familial histories, flying men and talking donkeys. . . .

HEY GUESS WHAT? MORE WAR!

Murder-Mom Casey Anthony goes to war against large-tittied Kim Kardashian, who said the gorgeous and camera-friendly Casey Anthony killed her own photogenic baby. We got your attention yet? Obama wants to go to war with Libya. . . .

Elf Wax Times announces anti-lesbian platform

The Elf Wax Times doesn’t hate lesbians, but statistics show that as the number of lesbians increase, the number of girls willing to fuck Elf Wax staff writers declines, threatening America’s freedom. . . .