Haiti before the earthquake

The Elf Wax Times takes you on an inside look at poverty-stricken Haiti before the earthquake that rescued many from starvation. . . .

STAY INDOORS! DEADLY GEMINID METEOR SHOWER TONIGHT

Apocalypse or gift from the Heavens? You decide after we give you one hyper-delusional side of this annual story of Gemini’s Wrath. . . .

Eleven dead after release of new McDonald's "food product"

Micky D’s Darkest Day: McDonald’s claims thousands of lives every year using diabetes, malnutrition and obesity, but today was different. . . .

Meet your new Elf Wax reporter!

The Elf Wax Times is proud to bring you fresh talent and new insight! Join us to learn more about your fearless new writer. . . .

FEAR 960 AM BROADCASTS UFO SIGHTING VIA DIRECT NASA FEED THROUGH LOCAL AFFILIATE "THE HATE HOLE"

Just what it says. Get with the program.

New things are happening. Don’t use your real information. Don’t worry about me. What’s there will eventually be pushed into obscurity. I will delete this article once it finds a happy position on the front page.

And once hosting is launched, I . . .

Don't live a sham. Know the truth, with EvoCam

Since the dawn of time, paranoid delusional people have been denied the opportunity to dodge reality and dive into the upward-spiraling colossus of a self-feeding reward system of worry. But now we can, with EvoCam.

Combining the award-winning prestige of the highly adaptive miniature video camera with the competence of your common desktop or laptop . . .

The Answer to the Questioning of Everything

Collegetown,USA—Very few classes teach us to ask questions.Quite the opposite, we are taught not to question, but to remember.But how does one learn without asking questions?What are we really being taught?

April’s Fool.Here you are, operating on the knowledge of those who died and lived before you.That . . .