Skincare Advice From Dr. Angstrom H. Troubadour
Sup fellow dudes! I have come up with a totally badass plan to get you ready for the summertime. By following these 10 easy tips, you can battle the blistering heat coming off that god damn life-giving star in the sky.
1. Skin Cancer . . .
The President just . . . stood there, staring out vacantly at everybody. We didn’t know what he was doing. He said it was a moment of silence. But for what? . . .
THE CDC HAS ISSUED A PUBLIC HEALTH ALERT FOLLOWING DISCOVERY OF A SWINE FLU STRAIN THAT MUTATES ONCE INSIDE DOMESTICATED CATS . . .
Something’s wrong with Tom Arnold, as evidenced within (but not by) his HIT TV SHOW REDNECK WEDDING. . . .
Hey, what’s up fellow Dudes! So totally check this new diet I’ve worked out for the modern man. I even did some math and stuff to make sure it’s completely healthy.
First thing’s first-drink a TON of energy drinks. The caffeine really kicks your metabolism up a notch! To cancel out all those nasty carbs . . .