A personal appeal from Chronicle.SU founder Ronny Nitro

CHRONICLE.SU needs YOU! (To GTFO) . . .

Redlight King releases hit single "Old Man" again for the first time

Sorry, Neil Young. . . .

The New Shit (part 2)

You elected a two-dollar whore and got mad ’cause he blows like a porn star. Let’s talk about landing people on the asteroids. . . .

Heroin solves life's problems

Got life? Try heroin! . . .

CAPS LOCK ULTRA

Lebal Drocer unleashes a new product on humanity. “This time it’s legal,” says spokesman Jeffrey Winebergeron. . . .

Internet addiction 'doubles teen self harm'

China has conducted a very unbiased survey of a small group of Communism-loving teenagers who find themselves victimized by the Internet. . . .

Modern Warfare 2: "If this is war, I wanna be there!"

Is slaughtering innocents enough to help us win the fight against Terror? You decide, on level three. . . .

MASS MIND-RAPE BROUGHT TO YOU BY LEBAL DROCER

Cuthbert, Ga.–A local clergyman molested three boys in the course of one morning shift in the confessional box. On this subject, Pope Benedict XVI spoke publicly, however bluntly, when he told the press, “Join us or die.” The spiritual leader then claimed to be pure energy, and compared himself to “the malevolent moon” whose gravity . . .