Humanity Party cult leader Chris Nemelka to introduce Donald Trump at Roanoke rally, promises ‘big truth’

2016-election

ROANOKE, Va. — Trump aides confirmed Humanity Party leader Chris Nemelka, a neoconservative religious cult leader who plies his congregation with opioids, is scheduled to introduce the 2016 Republican presidential nominee at a rally in the quiet mountain village of Roanoke, Virginia.

Humanity Party leader Chris Nemelka, seen here comparing himself to . . .

This man can’t believe how good PCP is on first time trying it

Some that have suggested the Darknet isn't so Dark have ignited a controversy causing a spate of vicious doxings and e-torture

“I feel so good I could throw someone through a fence!” announced Gerald Davis, moments after smoking PCP for his very first time, and just before getting behind the wheel of a friend’s 2001 Honda Accord.

Police in Roanoke, Virginia reported that a driver high on PCP bailed out of the moving car . . .

The Hyper Social Revolutionary Network Has Risen

Mob rule is everything in the Hyper Revolutionary Social Networking device.

This message comes from the Public Relations desk of your very own chronicle.su:

While on its way to chronicle.su’s chief war correspondent Viet Zam, a message from Lillian King was intercepted early October, establishing a multi-tiered dialog around the coming “Social Network Revolution.” After . . .

Occupy Roanoke: John Edwards chased away by own sense of shame

What happens when politicians visit apolitical rallies such as Occupy Roanoke? . . .

To Roanoke

A man does cocaine and throws up his cocaine all over the cocaine. . . .

Fever To Sing

Fever to Sing was a festival. Elf Wax was there. . . .

The Elf Wax Times is brought to you by…

This is the closest thing you’re ever going to get to a commercial on The Elf Wax Times. Fuck advertising, fuck the media, and fuck your blind faith in the government. . . .

The Elf Wax Times Boasts Monumental Success

The Elf Wax Times has exploded onto your computer screen like a poorly-timed orgasm. Read more to find out how literal this disgusting metaphor really is! . . .

I'd like to sext you up

There are little girls who trail behind mommy or daddy through Anytown, USA, staring down into their twiddling hands at what is without fail – and without question – a cell phone. . . .

Stoner realizes speed of Earth's movement through space, blows mind

A Cave Spring-area youth was high on marijuana today when he realized that time does not exist and therefore […] . . .