Soda Shaq Review Part III – MAN DRINKS WHOLE CAN

Old Brutus describes Soda Shaq as “a nutritious, all natural health soda offered exclusively by white-owned 7-Eleven stores.” . . .

Area Man Fatally Bludgeoned With Baseball Bat

CAHULAWASSEE, GA — A local man was found fatally wounded today after an apparent bludgeoning. The victim, whose name remains unreleased until the notification of kin, was found dead and freshly buried in the ground, wrapped in a blue tarp. Not much is known of the victim at the time of press, . . .

Toka Cola- BLAZE ON!

Get Blazed! Denny Blazin’ Hazin’ Average Homeboy recommends Toka-Cola because “IT GETS YOU BLAZED!”

“Now I’m not the typical rapper that you’ll see. I gotta have my toka cola and I want it free. So here I am layin it down, I hope my rapping doesn’t make you frown!”

-Denny . . .