Fireworks dot com

Well kiddos, I’ve been to both HELL and HEAVEN, so here’s what I have to report. Listen up, because this is important!

  • Anonymous is NOT the “final boss” of the Internet.
  • The Internet is actually NOT a video game.
  • If you take everything you read seriously, you might end up starting a cult.
  • Starting cults is so easy a caveman could do it.
  • Controlling and influencing others is fun only for masochists.
  • Suzie the Floozie IS actually a prophetess.
  • Being a jerk will only get the respect of other jerks, and that’s not worth much.
  • Hate is just love for jerks.
  • The world’s a hall of mirrors which will deeply disturb serial jerks.
  • Even funny lies can hurt people.
  • There’s probably no right and wrong, but there are nightmares.
  • If you find yourself constantly rationalizing your own behavior, you will have nightmares.
  • Being a hero is for idiots and cartoon characters. Do you really want to be a cartoon character?
  • Pretending to be your hero makes you look like an idiot.
  • Apologizing makes you look like an idiot.
  • A hell of a lot of people are in love with death and don’t even know it.
  • If you think people are out to get you, you probably think you’re way too important.
  • Lay down with the fleas, and you’ll turn into a dog.
  • “God” was created in your image, so she/he’s really a joke. “Real” nonetheless.
  • There are plenty of people out there who will gladly spend immense amounts of time teaching you these lessons the hard way, if necessary.

Aaaaaaand there ya go

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