Scientists are scrambling to come up with a way to neutralize Fukushima Radiation.
FUKUSHIMA — A new study by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration shows that temperatures in the Pacific are heating up at an enormous rate, due to another massive leak of radiation at Fukushima. Worldwide, citizens are reporting excessive humidity and rain which is a direct result of the rapid increase in the Pacific Ocean’s increasing temperature.
Nuclear Climatologist Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador said, “Even if no more radiation were to leak, we could conservatively estimate another 80 years of increased Pacific Ocean surface temperatures. Global humidity will not decrease until the fallout loses most of its potency in 40 years. There are no imaginable countermeasures to waterborne oceanic fallout that will not increase the already considerable strain on ocean life.”
Weeks ago, the Ocean began boiling around Fukushima. There is now too much steam to photograph the area.
Psychoanalyst Dr. Herman Stephenson said, “The Japanese have a symbolic fixation on both nuclear disasters and the ocean. It is unthinkable that any single sensible person would locate a nuclear power plant right on the oceanfront in a place where Tsunamis are so common. Perhaps the loss of World War 2 and the subsequent 70 years of a novel government guided by Western values has inspired an unconscious suicidal urge. Perhaps it was even a long-delayed conscious act of Seppuku.”
Snowden told reporters he had proof Martin Luther King was assassinated in a secret CIA plot.
MOSCOW — Edward Snowden, NSA leaker, shared secret CIA documents with Internet Chronicle reporters which incontrovertibly prove that Martin Luther King was murdered because, as the internal memo says, “Initial analysis showed blacks just wanted to use public restrooms and participate in pointless ‘voting’ rituals, but that n***er King has crossed the Rubicon and wants actual change. He wants to organize labor. Take him out at any cost.” This secret CIA memo was dated just a few days before King was assassinated.
Snowden chose Martin Luther King Day to release these shocking documents for its symbolic importance to Americans. This holiday is a time to remember King’s famous “dream,” which has turned into a nightmare in many urban areas where schools are still segregated and the only form of social mobility left is drug dealing.
Snowden said he believed King’s dream has been systematically stamped out by the CIA, “A rogue group within the CIA acted with impunity to target blacks. They murdered JFK, MLK, and hired the scientists who invented crack. Then, they sent agents into black urban centers to teach drug dealers how to cook crack, ensuring that the socioeconomic imbalance would continue to favor whites for as long as possible. Is it a coincidence that since then, the war on drugs has imprisoned millions of blacks? Based on a few hints, I believe this cabal within the CIA actually held more allegiance to the Ku Klux Klan than the US government, and what’s more, it seems they’re still operating to this day to keep ‘drug war’ propaganda in the public eye. It’s time to let Martin Luther King’s people go. They’ve been in prison for long enough.”
We all knew it already. The government’s the devil.
INTERNET — Every single fucking day, Twitter revolutionaries speak of dismantling the government. Why? Because our friends at the NSA have terrible surveillance powers no one should ever have access to, and the military conveniently polices genocidal dictators. Terrible, chilling stuff. But if you take down the government, you take down a monolithic totem of evil.
Tomorrow, Anarchist hackers will shut down all major government networks and permanently wipe all the government hard drives. Because the government will be so off guard, other Anarchists will be inspired by the propaganda of such an epic deed, and all levels of government even down to police stations and schools will be dissolved or brought under control of the Anarchists. A lot of people will probably die in this process, but not so many as one might think, because Anarchists are nice and don’t really want to hurt anyone.
The next day, many billionaires, sensing a vacuum of power, will offer to pay members of the disenfranchised military and police forces a reduced wage. Better than nothing, and no one will have to starve or find a nonexistent job market for their skills. Order will be enforced more ruthlessly than ever and corporations will have absolutely no reason to protect any individual rights, as such things do not generally help make a profit. The days of old, when police officers could be prosecuted for hate crimes, will be long over. Now the NSA won’t spy on you, but Google and every other major Telecom has been playing that game for as long as they’ve been in business, and there won’t be much need for pesky privacy agreements because there will be no courts for you to sue them with. All prisons will be corporate prisons filled simply with people who chose Coke instead of Pepsi or pirated movies online.
[pullquote]”Right now there is a conspiracy among many of the world’s most powerful corporations to destroy all nation states so that business can make more profit.” ~ Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador[/pullquote]These things will all be very good for business, but actually this is where we are now. Government is suffocating under corporate power. The greatest hoodwink they’ve played is telling us the government is to blame for their evil. “We’ve got too much government, and if we only had a little less, or none at all, everything would be solved.” Yes, it is the corporations telling you that government stands between you and your freedoms, because that message makes them money. They can’t scream it loud or repeatedly enough, because they’ve just now discovered how damned effective it is at increasing their profits. When you buy this idea and slap an Anarchy label on it, or go to a Tea Party event because you saw it on Their television networks, you’re led to believe you’re opposing evil, and all you’re doing is helping some corporate bigwig afford enormous excesses of equity that can’t be spent on anything but property in Iraq, Afghanistan, or Syria! Pretty damned good trick, huh?
You’re probably too damned radical to want to participate in the boring work of political organizing, or maybe you’re so damn radical you did, so you joined the Tea Party. All Hail the New TransNational Corporate Overlord. You!
