Month: October 2013

INTERNET — Documents confiscated from Bin Laden’s compound in Afghanistan show plans to deploy “human bomb” technology in which certain explosive chemicals dissolved into the bloodstream of a bomber can be detonated with a small rise in alcohol blood content. Completely undetectable to any known scans, such “human bombs” could be an important tool for post-9/11 terrorist attacks by Al-Qaeda.

Professor of chemistry Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador told reporters, “I’ve gone over these documents and these chemicals can be manufactured by any well equipped laboratory at a relatively moderate price. I’d be shocked if the terrorists weren’t already stockpiling these bio-explosives for a large scale attack. One sip of wine and a single terrorist could potentially split a large airliner in half, but Al-Qaeda would likely stockpile enough of this chemical to get maximum returns. That is, there may be one day very soon when Al-Qaeda can afford to take down every major airliner in the world with one swift human bomb blitz.”

This story has gone mostly unreported because of a fear of widespread panic. As is well known, much of the mainstream press has fallen under increasing scrutiny, especially when reporting on terrorism, due to excessive NSA data mining. Experts are afraid this human bomb may turn the tide in the war on terrorism in favor of the terrorists and force every airline passenger to take a blood test before boarding an airplane.

INTERNET — If there’s one thing you shouldn’t trust, it’s a pervasive and simple narrative. Certain recent events have been framed as a so-called government shutdown. But is this really what’s happening? Is congress, the judicial branch, or the executive lounging off and kicking back? Certainly not. They’re wound up tight, running around like the sky is falling, holding repeated press conferences and distorting the views of the other party as hard and fast as possible. Obama’s sending out highly risky raids on Islamic Terrorists, just to show how strong he is on defense to answer all the Secret Muslim fan theorists who think “Government Shutdown” means we’re slacking on defense. Petty drug smokers are still being locked up. The government, most certainly, has not shut down. It is running lean and mean as the Corporate Raiders have always hoped.

The more corporations can privatize government functions, the more markets open up for corporations. The less regulations and taxes, the more of these profits the businesses keep. Traditional methods like lobbying and public advocacy have been successful in pressing this neoliberal agenda, exaggerating corporate power and placing the US in a situation where sprawling multinational corporations are underwritten or guaranteed (frame-up “bail outs”) by the government and sometimes not taxed at all. This leaves us now in an unstable state where either government must rein business in or be entirely eclipsed by it. The simplified narrative posing the contending parties as the Republican and Democrat factions is surely true enough on a superficial level, but it is clear both parties are losing face from the continued bad press. Neither party has much to gain from the intentional budget gridlock which has suspiciously been framed as a total government shutdown. The strain of capitalist, neoliberal, and libertarian thought encapsulated by the Tea Party may be able to generate a third party separate from the Republican establishment, all framed as a great victory over the failed shutdown, but it is more likely the Tea Party will lose the most face.

This is not a shutdown but a teardown that started after World War 2. The government teardown is continuing at a greater pace as capitalism marshals increasing popular support in addition to its now calcifying influence over the legislature and the bureaucracy. Citizens may find themselves soon freed from the shackles of the oppressive government and transformed into mere employees.

WAL * MART — Communist elements The great Senator Joe McCarthy once purged from American Society have resurfaced at the helm of the world’s largest Capitalist institution, Wal Mart. Wal Mart now offers its employees healthcare plans, locking these people into an anti-Libertarian nightmare fueled by Ayn Rand’s Objectivism turned inside out. How could they have slipped it by us? Is the Invisible hand of the Free Market Economy broken?

The Communist elements, as is well known, solidified their power in America after McCarthy outed them. They took total control of the News and Entertainment Industries. This is the only reason Liberal presidents, or Nigerians like Obama can possibly be elected. No matter how many women they sexually harass or how many freedoms of ours they steal, these Liberal Presidents will get away with it all. And anyway, Obamacare forces people to buy healthcare on the “free” market, which is infinitely better than being locked into a Wal Mart company healthcare plan that isn’t even a plan at all. You are paid nothing and told that the drugs are a lower price because of this, at Communist Wal Mart. That’s exactly how the Soviets ripped their people off.

Did you know The Tea Party consists of 90% Wal Mart employees who are being paid by Big Tobacco companies to put on fake protests which justify something nobody actually wants? (Government Shutdown.) Communists have always paid shills to put on fake protests so they can get their way. Don’t believe what you see on Television! It’s all Liberal lies, even when it doesn’t look like it! Even Fox News and Sean Hannity!

I Believe in The United States Constitution and I Love this Land, but I am Sick of Tea Party Stealth Communists, and Weed Smoking Libertarian Whack Jobs taking control of My Republican Party and shutting down MY Capitalist Government which only wants to stimulate the Health Care Economy. Republicans made the plan up, and it was a damn good plan that would create jobs! Then the Democrats called the damned thing “Obamacare” with their false-flag Fox News shills and everyone else picked up on that term. Suspicious? Only a Communist could shut down such a rabidly Capitalist congress.