DETROIT, MICH.–This year at the Gathering of the Juggalos, fans caught a thief and swiftly enacted mob justice, destroying the thief’s car, not knowing that it was stolen. In the following video, a Jeep Grand Cherokee driven by a man in full dark carnival style makeup flips his truck over the wreck, heaped up strategically by the “family” to chants of “holy shit.”
The angry mob, unsatisfied with even this triumphant scene, loaded the car onto a UHAUL trailer and paraded it around the festival. As the car and trailer scraped across the pavement doing thousands in damage to the park property and the trailer, cries of “Family,” “Fuck the Thief,” and “Occupy Car Wreck” spread to every corner of the festival, making all would-be thieves aware of Juggalo Law.
This video shows the car on parade before it is displayed at the main stage. POD plays hard metal.
The acronym ‘mmfwcl’ stands for much motherfucking wicked clown love.
Martial Arts Tricking Battle @ White Lotus Closing Gathering – March 24, 2012
LOS ANGELES–St. Vincent Medical Center was overwhelmed with ankle injuries from so-called “Trickers,” following a Tricking competition Thursday.
Tricking is a new multi-disciplinary martial art form drawing heavily from Capoeira and Gymnastics which has recently become wildly popular in the Los Angeles area. The spate of injuries has raised questions among legislators who think this dangerous sport could be made safe with more regulations.
“I couldn’t think of a more dangerous sport. Here in LA alone, we’ve had several kids paralyzed and hundreds of broken and sprained ankles all related to tricking,” said LA County Chief Health Commissioner Dan Gordon. “We need regulations for this kind of activity and now. I’m getting calls from concerned parents every day. It has reached epidemic level.”
Trickers are highly unorthodox martial artists because their approach is anti-pragmatic. Emulating so-called “wire fu” tricks from movies is the ultimate goal, and unlike gymnastics or other martial arts there is little or no value placed on control of the body. Any landing is a good landing, as long as the Tricker maximizes the number of spins, kicks, punches, and flips incorporated into each trick.
At least a dozen Trickers have been hospitalized in savage beatings this year, as other martial artists in the LA area challenge their right to teach such a “laughable” martial art. “Tricking is not a martial arts. Tricking is not even gymnastics. It is a form of dancing,” said an enraged Kung Fu master under the condition of anonymity. “We can’t have them teaching this kind of fighting to young men who think they are learning how to defend themselves. That’s why we had to run them out of town. It is an ancient tradition of Kung Fu, and they must be able to defend their style of fighting.”
DALLAS–Wednesday, Former White House Deputy Chief of Staff Karl Rove was found dead in his home. The Dallas Police Department reported acute asphyxiation as the cause of death but do not suspect foul play. Known to George W. Bush as the “Architect,” Rove was Senior Advisor to the Bush Administration. He was 61 years old.
Rove’s social media team and Chronicle.SU, both subsidiaries of Lebal Drocer, worked together to announce Rove’s untimely and tragic death.
Rove is known for inventing the newest enhancement to democracy, micro-targeting. Squads of specially trained arguers use cold reading techniques taken from phone psychics and latch on to the issues that the person cares about most. After locating the wedge-issue, they launch into one of several dozen specially-designed speeches said to convert nine out of ten voters to the Republican Party.
Former Governor Mitt Romney’s campaign spent nearly three hundred billion dollars on a micro-targeting campaign directed by Rove. Speaking angrily of Rove, Romney barked at the reporter from the Internet Chronicle, “The president’s campaign, if you will, focused on giving targeted groups a big gift. [Rove] made a big effort on small things.”
Rove’s legacy as a political consultant, the truest kind of free-market democrat, will live on through his latest book “Courage and Consequence: My Life as a Conservative in the Fight,” which is available now at a discounted rate from Lebal Drocer, Inc.
