YPSILANTI, MI–Early Wednsday Morning, Soulja Boy announced his affiliation with the Illuminati while at a party with Lil Tunechi, Sabu, Nicki Minaj, Topiary, Barrett Brown, and many others. The new album “Souljanati” will explore his Masonic rites and explain the reason why Michael Jackson had to be removed from the fold.
Lil Tunechi and Soulja Boy celebrated by snorting a carefully-arranged hashtag-shaped line of the best Colombian Fishscale Cocaine, which they chased with a bottle of Robitussin. Jennifer Emick, the gracious host of this party and 33rd degree Illuminati Leader, immediately turned away all Souljaboy fans who didn’t bring her a generous offering of malt liquor, thus denying them entry into the Illuminati.
Ron Bryn arrived late, rambling to himself about Neal Rauhauser, and licked the table clean of all traces of cocaine. Later, he attacked several partygoers for their role, as he described, in “Adrian Lamo’s menacing Nazi sockpuppet network.”
Meanwhile, some guy named Shm00ptheGod had a really great jerk session and he didn’t even use lube this time.
14 replies on “Soulja Boy Reveals Illuminati Association”
iluminati rocks…its soljaboy’s decission 2 do what he wants!am also enlightened
HI JESUS LOVES ALL PEOPLE— HE IS THE ULTIMATE POWER OF ALL- JESUS CHRIST AND HIS ULTIMATE BLOOD SACRIFICE OF PURE BLOOD FOR ALL OURSINS—–PLEASE COME TO HIM NOW AND BE SPARED FROM HELL in ETERNITY!!! JESUS LOVES U AND FORGIVES ALL SINS EXCEPT BLASHPHMEY OF THE HOLY GHOST1=======hurt no one– offend no one!!!
mmm mmm good milk!
Soulja boy…another dumb nigger.
evil crackers! is always the problem no one wants to conquer the world but them
*POOT* <—smell that one, nigger.
fak fak fak fakimana illuminati