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Politics

Witnesses: Mitt Romney Masturbates on Hotel Balcony

This photo allegedly shows a nude Mitt Romney engaged in public masturbation.

SPRINGFIELD, CONN. – At 9:00 a.m., passersby in a quiet Connecticut town say they expressed horror and shock at the sight on a hotel balcony of a masturbating middle-aged man,  a man whom they claim to have been been front-runner for the Republican Party presidential nod, Mitt Romney. The cellphone photos they took, which have since ignited a social media firestorm, appear to show the former Massachusetts governor expose himself, “masturbating for all to see.” The balcony height of downtown Springfield’s Marriott  exposed Mr. Romney’s public sex act, they say, to a crowd including children as young as five.

At time of press, there is a poverty of coverage from networks due to the explicit nature of the evidence, and the gravity of the consequences for the Romney campaign. Democratic strategist James Carville today compared the mainstream media’s silence up to this point to the gulf of time between the National Enquirer’s breaking of the John Edwards affair and its widespread entry into public discourse. “It’s just denial,” said Mr. Carville, a former senior campaign adviser to President Bill Clinton.

The Springfield District Attorney’s Office says the presumptive Republican nominee has not been charged with a crime. Mr. Romney reportedly fled the balcony immediately after he was spotted, and no solid video evidence has yet surfaced. However, one witness did capture a blurry photograph which shows the candidate before he turned to re-enter a room.

Analysts suggest this is the end to Romney’s campaign, and Newt Gingrich will likely take the place as front runner after Romney suspends his campaign. Representatives from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Mr. Romney’s religious denomination, released statements to the press saying they are “appalled by the bigotry” of commenters, whose “partisan desperation,” they say, has contributed to an animus to smear the candidate, 65. The release says the church is “dismayed” by crass insinuations “any morning ‘open-air’ masturbation ritual” is a “normal part of Mormon culture.”

Categories
Editorial Hate

Barrett Brown’s harassment of Endgame Systems removed from Google

Barrett Brown’s Project PM “echelon2” Wiki page provides a look inside e-mails “gleaned” from the HBGary “hack.” Recently, a page about Endgame Systems, a business with connections to HBGary, was removed from the top spot on Google. A paranoid and apopleptic Barrett Brown insists that this is a part of a massive government cover up with political motivations. However, there is probably a more logical solution.

The page in question, which has been stricken from Google, contains a link to this document. Be forewarned: This link contains the names, addresses, and home phone numbers of people who have done nothing more than be born into the same family as a person who works for Endgame Systems. As a footnote to a highly charged political rant, lacking all semblance of journalistic or academic standards, the context is clearly malicious. While it’s not illegal to publish publicly available records, using the information as part of an implied threat is highly questionable.

It would be one thing if this was an isolated incident, but Brown has a long record of  employing these same scare tactics, even personally making threatening phone calls to his enemies. Brown’s called me a “moralfag” for my criticism of him and Anonymous, an insult which is as equally homophobic as it is misanthropic. Superior ethics and morals are what give activists their foothold in public discourse, and Brown can’t seem to understand this.

Sadly, Brown can’t even take what he dishes out: <BarrettBrown>  diversity of tactics that include libeling, harassing the guy who provides free lawyers to arrested Anons is hard to take seriously, too

He doesn’t pay a cent for the lawyers, but he holds this up as a holy talisman to ward off us evil mocking demons. Ain’t workin’.

Categories
News

The Panopticon

Criminals are caught nearly 99.999% of the time. There are drones hovering above cities recording a permanent record of every square inch in Hyper HD. What good is a mask when there is a record of everywhere a person goes? “Nothing to hide?”

Sadly, they hardly need drones. Most people carry around a smartphone equipped with GPS, streaming data to Google for permanent storage. People voluntarily give up their interests and schedules for trivial convenience. The hegemons are probably recording ambient noises and camera images every last second the phone is on. These images are all recovered “only” in the case of crime or civil suit.

The Panopticon’s first sight of new territory is through the camera of a fully loaded drone as outsourced specialists make sure the bombs detonated effectively and on target. The bombs turn first into gore and then smartphones. No buttons are even pushed. The process is entirely automated. This is how the Panopticon spreads. It will remember every moment of every human event with ever-increasing clarity.