Category: Special Interest

These are not regular interests

A personal appeal from Chronicle.SU founder Ronny Nitro

Post author By Ronny Nitro
Post date May 15, 2011
6 Comments on A personal appeal from Chronicle.SU founder Ronny Nitro

A personal appeal from Chronicle.SU founder Ronny "Wayne" Nitro

The Chronicle provides the public with the service of factual and up-to-date information that other news sources fear. Under the umbrella of Lebal Drocer, we are provided with an endless supply of capital. However, we are facing a desperate shortage of GTFO.

I’m writing this today to beg of you, please, do your part. Without more GTFO, Chronicle.SU will simply be unable to feed the internet hate-machine.

Without GTFO, we might be stuck with hours’ – or even days’ – worth of your unwanted presence, wasting bandwidth and hogging up all the truth so others can’t have any. Share the truth. GTFO.

Without GTFO, we can not be bothered to produce the counterculture propaganda you couldn’t possibly think up for yourselves. You need us, and we need you, to GTFO.

The dual nature of GTFO is the driving force of the Chronicle.SU. Without GTFO, there can be nothing out of which to GTF.

That is because there is a whole world outside. In order to fully understand and appreciate the Chronicle, you must GTFO: experience the outside world, watch FOX News, or at least shop at Kroger. Then come back to the Chronicle, and bring with you, please, your generous contribution of GTFO.

We welcome small donations as well!

This message has been brought to you by recursion, and Lebal Drocer, Inc.

Tags appeal, desperate pleas, donate, gtfo, lebal drocer, nitrocious productions, ronny nitro

Special Interest

This town sucks and everyone is lame except for me and my friends

Post author By Colonel Muammar Muhammad al-Gaddafi
Post date May 14, 2011
12 Comments on This town sucks and everyone is lame except for me and my friends

You know, this would be a great place to live if it wasn’t for all the people. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got a few good friends who make living in this shitty town okay. They are really exceptional at drinking, smoking, and playing video games. I don’t know what I’d do without them. It’s too bad that me and my small group of friends are the ONLY cool people around. It’s all that keeps me from committing suicide.

There’s literally nothing happening except for lame events with lame people. I need to get out of this town and forget that it ever existed. Sometimes it seems like everyone who lives here has a mental problem. There’s something in the water. Not only that, but all the girls here are so fat! This must be the fattest town in the world. I could move anywhere in the world and the women, no matter how ugly, would invariably be more fit for intercourse. The handful of girls attractive enough for sex are all married. Fuck this town, it is the reason I can’t get laid!

I go on Facebook all the time to tell everyone how much this place sucks. I hope all my friends on Facebook will move with me somewhere exciting like Miami or Hollywood. That’s where it’s at. Something’s always happening there, I know it.

You know, I’m sure that my art career will take off as soon as I go somewhere else. This small town is stifling my creativity. It is as if a cloud of fear hovers above the valley, smothering all the life out of it. My band, also, is not doing that well because of this town. No one here appreciates music or art at all, and if they do, they’re not willing to throw money at me for being so great. If it wasn’t for this damn town, I’d already be rich and famous!

One day I’m going to pack up, leave this town, and forget it ever existed. I will be the most famous person to ever come from this shit-town. I’m so much better than this town, and it’s all the other people’s fault that my life sucks!

News Special Interest

AnonNews allows Google to track commenters with reCAPTCHA

Post author By chronicle.su
Post date May 3, 2011
23 Comments on AnonNews allows Google to track commenters with reCAPTCHA

anonnewsprivacysrape — This was a real Captcha, sent in by a reader. The Completely Automated Public Turing Test To Tell Computers and Humans Apart has gained a consciousness of its own, and is warning us.

The Internet–Chronicle.SU went on the record before reporters Tuesday to apologize for months of unauthorized data-mining of hundreds of thousands of readers.

A Chronicle.SU insider, known only as Media Mogul, spoke on-stage from behind a curtain. He said, “A particularly scathing piece of anti-Google propaganda from our friends at p2pNet graced AnonNews early this morning. This led Chronicle.SU to the conclusion that we must boycott the data-mining malware known as Google-Analytics completely, along with any and all similar forms of spyware which compromise user data – and more importantly – the golden integrity of the infallible and glorious Chronicle.SU.”

And in a flash of light he was gone, followed immediately by the appearance of Kilgore Trout, Executive Editor of the Chronicle.SU.

Trout said, “We will gladly publish any details upon request,” adding, “those who use noscript are not affected by our leak to Google.”

“As should be expected,” Trout said sneeringly, “this highly interesting piece from p2pnet wasn’t ‘relevant’ enough for AnonNews. But I believe many of you will be shocked to find out AnonNews currently employs a piece of Google code to ‘keep out spammers’ known as reCAPTCHA. Its privacy policy leaves much to be desired.”

reCAPTCHA Privacy Policy – by Google

Those who use noscript are unable to comment on AnonNews without disabling their security to Google tracking cookies. AnonNews.org forces users to either compromise their anonymity or hide, like cowards, behind a proxy, which still does nothing to prevent the cookies.

Should Anonymous fear its own “news source?”