Internet Chronicle

ARGENTINA —  Albert Nisman was shot dead by an unknown villain after he threatened to bring a case against Argentine President Cristina Fernandez for an alleged Iranian Bombing coverup.

Friday, Gerardo Pollitica took over the investigation and by Saturday evening he was also shot dead.

From his mobile prison in Texas, Barrett Brown told Anonymous, “Anons in Argeninta, Investigate! Anon took out Scientology, Anon took out ISIS. Project PM announces the formation of #OpJeSuisNisman, and we will bring Freedom to Argentina like we did to Tunisia. Anons, I cannot send out timely messages about the multitude of stories I miss while in Diesel Therapy. Remember! Never waste a good media event, and if it’s a slow day make one up.”

INTERNET — Fans mourn the loss of Guy Fieri, Food Network’s host for hit television show Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives. Fieri died Saturday evening from an impacted stool that ruptured his appendix and caused a fatal infection.

Fieri was known for reviewing some of the best food joints in America, traveling in his iconic red Mustang.

Guy entered his iconic “hunch” for the last time on Friday afternoon, eating a corned beef and pastrami sandwiched between two doughnuts smothered in “food lube” at Gerry’s Diner in Des Moines.

“He’s in the flavor town in the sky now, no doubt,” said Food Network chef and personal friend of Fieri’s, Mario Batali.

INTERNET — Chopped Judges and celebrity chefs Aaron Sanchez, Alex Guarnaschelli, and Marc Murphy tested positive for HIV after ingesting trace amounts of infected blood during the filming of the competition cooking show. It is unknown which competitor is responsible, but Food Network is investigating.

Contestants on Chopped are given just minutes to concoct dishes to please the judges and often cut themselves in haste. Usually the camera crews spot accidental contamination of food by contestants, even if the accident goes unnoticed to the contestant.

Ted Allen, the show’s host, said, “Cameras can’t catch every detail, but we are reviewing footage as well as investigating medical records to see who might be responsible. Despite this unfortunate and tragic accident, the show must go on.”

Food Network plans to air a special episode of Chopped in which HIV positive chefs will serve dishes to the newly infected judges, emphasizing safety and tolerance.