FDA approves powerful new opioid for jazz musicians

Immediately following the government reopening, the FDA reportedly gave “emergency approval” to a powerful new opioid for jazz musicians whose deep souls are in deeper pain.

The profound words on this page will have you crumbin’ for Dr. Troubadour’s new medicine for the soul, Miles fuckin Gravis, a totally bomb-ass way for you and your boys to

Forever 27

Miles Gravis will send you to an early grave!

Offering instant, long-lasting relief from bullshit like misery, grief, heartache, and sorrow, Dr. T’s Proprietary Opioid makes Gray Death look like sunshine.

Take the 27 Challenge!

FREE SWEEPSTAKES – ENTER TO WIN

An opiate-wary audience is considered out of reach to marketing pedagogues, so Purdue has teamed up with Lebal Drocer Inc to run a cheap little sweepstakes, called the 27 Challenge.

The first 10,000 musicians to die with Miles Gravis still in their systems will be entered into a contest to be immortalized in the 27 Club  as the posterchild and lead tragedy for Lebal Drocer Pharmaceuticals (runner-ups play sideman!)

”I’m Phil Buckman, and opioids have ravaged the town I grew up in, killed my friends and family, and robbed a generation of stability. It will work for YOU, too!”

The Internet Chronicle is wholly, totally complicit in their scheme and shamelessly promoting it here. And what are you gonna do about it?

I’m Raleigh T. Sakers, and I triple-dog dare you to ask me to stop — Hate Radio, 2019

We’re all getting older, and we’re gonna damn die someday.

Pour a little Miles Gravis on that misery and watch in painless amazement as the newest drug from Lebal Drocer creates the smoothest, trippiest, psychedelic jazz you NEVER heard.

Them ol pain pills’ll gitcha, boy!

Published by hatesec

I am the hatest

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2 Comments

  1. Playing/writing is just about feeling. Playing/writing isn’t necessarily about misery. Playing/writing isn’t necessarily about happiness. But it’s just about letting yourself feel all those things that you have already on the inside of you, but you’re all the time trying to push them aside because they don’t make for polite conversation or something.
    Audiences like their blues singers (writers) to be miserable.
    Who you are is what you settle for, you know?

    Quote Of The Day

    I’m a victim of my own insides. There was a time when I wanted to know everything. It used to make me very unhappy, all that feeling. I just didn’t know what to do with it. But now I’ve learned to make that feeling work for me. – Janis

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