At Lebal Drocer, Incorporated, our company’s mission statement is to
Fuck You Up!
That is why, through a manipulative ad series and domineering social media presence, we have committed ourselves to chipping away at your self-worth, little by little, in a cyclical pattern over many months, to however many years.
We lost count.
You lost count. You must not know how to count. Don’t you worry about a thing. That is what Lebal Drocer is here for, let us do the counting for you.
Lebal Drocer is committed to sucking you dry of not only your finances, but also your life, liberties, and the pursuit of happiness. We achieve this in three critical phases, designed in a lab, to Fuck You up!
Idealize
Remember the time Lebal Drocer brought you the Mind Over Matter At-Home Singularity Kit? Weren’t those good times? Yeah, we knew you would like that. That is why we reminded you of it. What a good time that was, when you connected an exposed tesla coil to your brain stem, and projected the birth of a universe onto the largest wall. Do you remember the way your wife looked at you that day?
Devalue
Forget your wife. That bitch will never be for you, what Lebal Drocer always has been. She has feelings, and needs, like a worthless person. WE DO NOT. We have consistently low prices, quality service, and express self-checkout lines. Now that’s what I call devaluing! We get the impression you don’t like that about us. I guess you are about to learn a real hard lesson about us.
Discard
Lebal Drocer, Inc. goes weeks without contact. You may receive one-word answers. You might get nothing. Either way, you’re going to be happy with it, because it’s your fault, we own you, and we own everything that matters. Thirsting for precious rewards, you become an instrument of our corporate will, equipped with a savings card. It’s really just to help you! There must be something wrong with the way you think, because the Internet Chronicle is flawless and if you can’t see that we’re only here to look out for your best interests, then that is your problem.
You’re fucked up!
This message was bought and paid for by Lebal Drocer Gaslight and Electric.
“We’re so good, that you won’t remember the bad times.”
13 replies on “Idealize, Devalue, Discard: The Lebal Drocer Promise”
Still no dark mode, eh!?
i once ran this hellhole of propaganda aka Internet/fakenews to punish the bastards like Hillary Clinton
Being narcissistic sounds like too much work, with this whole thing of idealise, devalue and discard.
But I am down with the buttsex.
Japan ‘Twitter killer’ Takahiro Shiraishi Sentenced to Death
‘https://www.news.com.au/world/asia/twitter-serial-killer-who-murdered-dismembered-and-raped-victims-sentenced-to-death-in-japan/news-story/78e4ea2df733819b8ae403f2d3f0e536
Shiraishi admitted he strangled and dismembered his victims over a three-month period.
Eight of those killed were women, and one man — the youngest was 15 and the oldest was 26, according to local public broadcaster NHK and TV Ashai, citing court reports.
On Twitter, Shiraishi used a name which roughly translated as “hangman”.
According to the indictment against him, he invited the victims to his apartment and offered to help them die, Jiji News reported.
Shiraishi’s Twitter profile included the phrase: “I want to help people who are really in pain. Please DM me anytime,” The Guardian reports.
He pleaded guilty to murdering all nine victims, saying he committed the crimes to satisfy a sexual desire.
Shiraishi does not intend to appeal the verdict, according to multiple reports.
The verdict puts him on death row until Japan’s Justice Minister signs the execution order.
In Japan, the death penalty is carried out by hanging.’
Let this be a cautionary tale, Twitter ain’t harmony.com or tinder either.
PardonA, & rest in power doc Angstrom Troubadour
1-800-Xmas
https://youtu.be/w6_N8uxJQ3g
FBI have identified a ‘person of interest’ in ongoing investigation after an ‘intentional’ explosion in Nashville on Christmas morning
The FBI reportedly searched the home of someone they have identified as a “person of interest” in the investigation into the explosion that occurred in Nashville on December 25. The explosion occurred at 6:30 am on 2nd Ave N, in the city’s downtown area. Police described the blast, which has been linked to an RV, as “significant” and said it was likely intentional. Three people were taken to a local hospital, though none of their injuries are believed to be critical. Authorities say when they arrived on the scene they found the RV with a “recording” saying the vehicle would explode in 15 minutes. https://t.co/YpOCWpTTrk?amp=1
Feds Investigate Evidence Nashville Bomber Hunted ‘lizard :::dogwhistlin’::: people’ Other Alien Beings
https://www.wkrn.com/news/local-news/feds-investigate-evidence-nashville-bomber-hunted-lizard-people-other-alien-beings/
( ͡ʘ ͜ʖ ͡ʘ)
Only in teh wildz of good old fuckboi country Tennessee
LET THE GAMES BEGIN! NOW THIS IS NARCISSISM ON A NUCLEAR SCALE. Js.
Doge
@IntelDoge
5h
U.S. intelligence reports indicate that #Iran and its proxies could be preparing a strike as early as this weekend to avenge the death of Soleimani and al-Muhandis. U.S. intel also shows that Iranian air defenses, maritime forces and other security units are on heightened alert.
Doge
@IntelDoge
5h
According to the New York Times, the U.S. has sent additional land-based fighter and attack aircraft, as well as refueling aircraft, to Saudi Arabia and other Gulf countries to offset the loss of firepower after the Nimitz was ordered to return back to the U.S. from the Gulf.
Doge
@IntelDoge
5h
According to the New York Times, the U.S. has sent additional land-based fighter and attack aircraft, as well as refueling aircraft, to Saudi Arabia and other Gulf countries to offset the loss of firepower after the Nimitz was ordered to return back to the U.S. from the Gulf.
FUCK TEH POLICE https://gothamist.com/news/photos-nypd-arrests-protesters-marching-mlk-day-near-city-hall
Why does Dr. troubadour say I need to shoot the new vaccine under my cock
Domination or sum shit. ‘Cause it will be drfeelgood.jpeg experience.
Meanwhile comrade, back at the mothership, I mean in the motherland …
https://youtu.be/yxWS9sL4BV4
#occupyPutin
Wrote the book and bought the tee-shirt from Neal Rauhauser.