Author: Hatesec

I am the hatest

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
Entertainment

Justin Bieber wanted for assault in Argentina

Bieber died on March 7, 2013
Media Credit: justinbieberzone.com
Media Credit: justinbieberzone.com

BUENOS AIRES – JB’s at it again! Pop music’s most punchable face turned the tables on an Argentinian photographer when JB’s violent gang of thugs attacked an innocent paparazzo just doing his job.

Video footage put fans at ease, reassuring young women everywhere JB’s sensitive eyes were shielded from the incident by a thick black sheet.

Once convicted, Justin faces anywhere between one month and six years in a dirty, common South American prison.

Fans argue Justin is too rich and famous to answer to petty charges, and too important to face consequences. The commoner’s attorney, Matias Morla thinks otherwise.

“Now we just need to wait for the police to find him and bring him to Argentina,” Morla said. “For us, this is a triumph against all those who said this case was a bluff and that we didn’t have anything.”

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
Health

Important message from Dr. Dankstrom H. Troublememe

dankstrom-h-truememeWhat the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
News

Chronicle.su to institute gay readership ban

Notice Breitbart's long hair and unshaven face, sure signs of homosexual tendencies.

Homoerotic politicsINTERNET – The Internet Chronicle is proud to announce we will disable access to the chronicle.su domain for all homosexual readers. This change goes into effect immediately.

Under a fresh new Indiana ruling, chronicle.su is no longer required to cater to the godless homosexual agenda. As a result of this important change, our expert staff of writers and editors will be running more stories about sports, videogames, literature and war.

[pullquote]

It’s about ethics in journalism journalism.

Dr. Angstrom T. Heterodauer

[/pullquote]

All complaints should be registered in the comment fields below; however, be advised that if we detect homosexuality in your post, the comment will be deleted, your IP will be banned, and your voice silenced, forever.

Editor’s Note: Yes, we are losing money but you can’t put a price on religious freedom. As we like to say here at Lebal Drocer, “Freedom ain’t free.”