Category: Hate

Hate flows like wine which flows like water which all flows through Elf Wax

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Hate

Nobody gives a shit about your Facebook birthday

You have 27 friends with birthdays this week

Nope. I just have too many Facebook friends. Delete.

NO YOU ARE NOT AN ASSHOLE FOR DELETING THE BIRTHDAY EMAIL.

IT IS ONLY USEFUL FOR FINDING OUT WHO JUST TURNED 18.

I pretended to care once, too

If you really gave a fuck about whose birthday was coming up you would’ve already sent them a card, a phone call, an email a “go fuck yourself.” Something.

The obligatory “Happy birthday!” spam on people’s walls is nothing more than an indication that they check their fucking email.

In fact, you should consider yourself insulted that anyone would have the nerve to write “happy birthday” on your Facebook wall instead of sending a private email, because then they’re just using you to portray themselves as someone who cares.

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Hate

More Irrational Fears

  1. Spending half my time in the shower destroying evidence that I wiped our bar of soap across my mane of pubic hair.
  2. Worrying that when I smile someone believes I think I’m better than them.

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Hate

LulzSec, the lovable Anonymous Psy-Op

From the pit of despair that was AnonOps, a couple of new beasts have arisen. There seems to be little interest in continued DDoS attacks against just anyone. Apparently that part of Anonymous is in hibernation, waiting for the coming crack down on hackers. Barrett Brown’s Project PM – a combination of Wiki technology and the Guide to Pursuants – continues to reveal information from Aaron Barr’s emails. The most prominent post-AnonOps splinter is LulzSec. LulzSec is a group of hackers that break the unspoken rules of Anonymous for the lulz, and boy do they deliver.

Now close your eyes, and visualize the situation Anonymous faced after SonyGate. Someone, leaving the calling card of Anonymous, had accessed the personal information of tens of millions of people. Regardless of whoever was behind this attack, Anonymous stood to lose followers. Think of what a good troll would do in this situation. It doesn’t take a genius to see that LulzSec is the perfect solution.

After a round of attention-whoring on PBS, LulzSec hacked the fuck out of Sony and released the personal information of millions. Oh, the power of trolling when combined with hacking. It makes pussies all over the world go sopping wet, as lulz echo through the canyons. Dear LulzSec, are you the second coming, or the Anti-Christ?

Despite the pwnage of LulzSec, it is now the victim of the endless trolling cycle too. In a Twitter war against a tweeter who thought LulzSec was actually just working for Anonymous, LulzSec devolved to accusing this poor little twit of paying for the PBS hack. Of course, Fox News immediately attention whored this story and used it to prove that LulzSec is actually Anonymous. To many Fox News readers, LulzSec is now definitely Anonymous.

However, LulzSec purposefully breaks the unspoken rules of Anonymous. That is, they have attacked media and leaked the information of innocent people. This doesn’t solve the problem of Joe six pack’s hatred at Anonymous ruining his Call of Duty, but it does solve the glaring DDoS drop off in the wake of the Sony fiasco.

Anonymous has been cured of its lulz shortage, for the time being.