Silence is not golden. It is red, white, and blue.
“You have the right to free speech, as long as you’re not dumb enough to actually use it.”
Joe Strummer
I have published my unvarnished opinion at every opportunity, a personal success I am usually proud of. In high school, I made friends with others who were like-minded and I networked our websites together. I felt like that wasn’t enough, and provided an open section allowing anyone to make anonymous comments. Within one week of doing this, I was threatened with a lawsuit and expulsion for anonymous statements I had published but not written myself. Aside from these empty threats, the school brought in a psychologist who read everything I wrote and questioned me about my drug and alcohol usage. Upon learning that I had never so much as had a drink of alcohol, she was unable to punish me with further counseling and praised my writing. Because of her evil reverse psychology and the other trauma imposed on me by the administration, I didn’t write my opinions like that again for several years. Today, I get a special rush from writing that only a few others can understand.
I can’t help but identify with Julian Assange, at least in a small way. WikiLeaks is enabling and encouraging the freedom of anonymous speech, which is dangerous to the natural balance of power and runs contrary to America’s cultural standards. I will never keep my mouth shut, even if the consequence is death.
You see, the freedom of speech is not just about being able to criticize the government or your high school. It’s a matter of self-expression, personal value, and the pursuit of happiness. Even the least likely of people are shackled with silence, it is our culture and our nature. I have made every effort to remove myself from that prison, to express that which I am told is better left unsaid. It has been nothing if not an alienating experience and I don’t claim any kind of victory. With the Chronicle I have pushed the limits of speech in a purposeful attempt to highlight this for the world. I’ve of course been accused of hatred, attention seeking, and insanity. To that I almost feel thankful. I would never deny my own humanity.
I like to think of the Chronicle as a digital monument to the freedom of speech. I can’t tell you what it all means, or if it means anything at all. I just know that when I use the word love, I’m the one who’s fucked in the head, I’m the one who’s scary.
Let your voice be heard! Your civic duty is fulfilled and you can’t complain when they start dropping tear gas on your parade, even as you chant your support. You can take comfort in the fact that it’s not a daisy-cutter like they drop on the people who aren’t allowed to vote.
Voting is the greatest pillar of justice and equality. When you vote, you give your approval to whoever wins the election and whatever they do is in your name. Take pride in your vote for the government and all the great things it does for the world.
9/11 wasn’t an inside job, it was a blowjob. Sure, Clinton got more pleasure from his blowjob, but Bush got more approval. Now Obama’s ratcheted it up a notch and hoodwinked all the protesters with the promise of a little healthcare. Now you’re the one getting blown, and the government’s buying your Cialis and paying for the treatment when it blinds you. What goes on in Afghanistan is a state secret, but this is a modern age. If you really want to know what happens you can take a look at Wikileaks. Would it surprise you that civilians suffer more than Al-Qaeda or the Taliban? This is a state secret, but also a normal fact of war.
Silent consent is the kind of approval that allowed the holocaust to happen. Israel isn’t the end to all future holocausts. Zionism is a kind of holocaust revenge. Islam is the new Jew and Jews the new Hitler. If you’ve voted in the past few generations, this is what you’ve voted for. Holocaust. You voted for starving children in the Gaza strip and you voted for needless conflicts that serve the interests of multi-national corporations. They’d outsource your job to Mexico if they could find a way to get hot food served up to fat Americans from across the border.
This is your taxpayer money. This is the freedom you vote for. The education system I have voted for taught me that this was just deeply seated cultural differences between two religious groups. Life is good, but not in Gaza.
Spending billions of your taxes bolstering Israel’s military was never enough. Ruining Vietnam for generations was not enough. Overthrowing Saddam on false pretenses while Kim Jong cooked up a nuke didn’t impress me much. Russia took our peaceful precedent as an opportunity to invade Georgia. Afghanistan is history’s battlefield and it’s only appropritate we put our weight forward there now that all the cards are down. We set up a democratic government in Afghanistan only to see it turn to corruption. Is this a surprise? Surely the right to vote is the bulwark of liberty. Is it not?
Evil is necessary. Vote for it, you have no other choice.
Okay, there are some things in life you just can’t pass up. I almost clicked the Comment button. Seriously. And what do I have to lose? I should have just done it, but now it’s not funny anymore. Or maybe it was never funny. Or maybe it would just hurt that girl’s feelings because she is not who she used to be and I should not enforce a negative image upon her in front of everyone we’ve ever known personally, and my friends would say, “Come on, man, seriously?” and then I’d feel something called remorse.
That’s because I am a conscious, thinking man with the impulses of a terribly cruel bastard. Meh. What goes around comes around. I’ll get mine one day, but that day hasn’t come yet.
That being said, let’s talk a little shit about Facebook:
A lot’s changed since the last time I used it.
Why is it now considered stalking to look at someone’s profile?
Maybe I’m fucking interested. Am I a stalker now? In high school I dated this girl with a stalker and we didn’t have Facebook yet; in fact, myspace hadn’t even come out yet. What we did have was the telephone, and her back yard where we’d find him standing from time to time. That’s a stalker. This is a website and read this little factoid hot off the news feed: YOU CHOSE TO PUT YOUR INFORMATION ON IT.
I honestly don’t see what’s wrong with camping on a girl’s profile who you like and spamming F5 for hours at a time, or even all day. If that makes me a Facebook stalker, then I’m a Facebook stalker and my wrist hurts.
Why am I a “creeper” for hitting on girls with it?
Because if you do something as simple as using a communication device on a dumb girl, that word comes out. It’s not that sophisticated, honey. I didn’t go out of my way. Not for you. Maybe I can’t find what they call a good girl (which may or may not actually exist) at the bar because her face looks like a leather bag with a cigarette hanging out of it. Maybe I don’t find them at parties because *whore* Maybe I don’t find them where I work because they only hire men to do my job. Although, there is that one cute chick…but she’s a cocktease with a vendetta.
“WHORES AREN’T THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO GO TO PARTIES, MR. SMART ASS ELF WAX WRITER FOR THE INTERNET, MR. I FUCKING HATE EVERYTHING, MR. I CAN’T GET LAID SO I GO ONLINE AND RAGE ABOUT IT.”
Point taken. Still, fuck that.
I operate Facebook like a vast net, trawling the murky unknown for a good conversation, intelligent insight, a funny joke, adding strangers in the hopes of discovering a classy broad who isn’t afraid to go out on a limb and meet a religious rapist-murderer zealot she talks to online. Because I looove to rape me some bitches. So what if I filter out all the ladies except those whose relationship status has just changed to “single”? That’s how you find the ripe ones!
brb jerking off to facebook
Why do people refuse to hang out with me and then have three-hour conversations with me across Facebook?
Maybe it’s because I’ve always been friends with lazy stoners. Or they just don’t like me, which pretty much invalidates our friendship status. -1 friend but there are still 257 left
“Wow asshole, you sure do have a lot of negative opinions about Facebook. Maybe you should stop using it?”
Maybe. But for now, I have developed a sort of perverted fondness for it – like Wal-Mart. Facebook bastardizes human interaction. Wal-Mart destroys local economies. I think the friendship economy is in a recession.
There is intrinsic value in the understanding and hatred of many things, and I encourage all of you to attack something or someone you hate today.
Now, I’m going out to throw some alcohol onto this roaring fire of rage and then I’ll come back to report its effects.
This has been brought to you by Lebal Drocer
“Facebook is garbage.”
-Mike Odum
Edit: I’m home again. I did not drink too much, as I took a look around at my surroundings and into my glass and decided that I’m not reaching my full potential sitting at the bar around people I hate more than myspace. My perspective has not changed, but it did occur to me after some conversation on the matter that Facebook is occasionally used for its intended purpose, like catching up with an old friend after many years. However, my opinion that it is a cesspool of immeasurable proportions will never change, but only reinforce itself as that website gets older and more used, like the girls on it.
