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How the Grinch stole Lulzmas

EDIT: After posting this article, Sabu clarified that his tweet did not, in fact, mean that he had stolen from the accounts of 90,000 law enforcement agents, journalists, intelligence community members, and whitehats. The part about journalists was actually shorthand for “corporate media executives,” and of the 90,000 accounts mentioned, only a few were stolen from on Christmas.

This is the tweet that caused so much confusion
Only Sabu and the Grinch steal on Christmas.

In the past, attacks on the media have been one of the few taboos among hackers in the Anonymous collective. And rightly so, as Anonymous generally stands firm on the issue of freedom of information and especially freedom of the press. With the exception of relatively harmless LulzSec defacements of NPR and The Sun, this has been one of the unspoken rules followed by the collective. That is, until now.

Merry Christmas! Unless, of course, you happen to be a journalist for a corporate “white hat” news outlet. In other words, an enemy of “the people” as defined by dear leader Sabu. Sabu tweeted out his Robin Hood hit-and-run on Christmas Eve, a present to all who follow his glorious command. That’s right, the bank accounts of journalists were raided to help make a million dollar donation to Sabu’s unnamed charity of choice. Possibly Hamas, as his Twitter avatar suggests. Only the Grinch steals on Christmas, doing it all for the lulz. Maybe Sabu’s just trolling us all for teh Lulz, too. He’ll come riding down the mountain with all the presents and all the little Who reporters will get their Christmas back.

Christmas this year isn't all bad, at least Boxxy showed some cleavage. Well, I'm not sure what's growing in her hair there.

This is, in effect, the same tactic employed by Mastercard and Paypal to punish WikiLeaks for publishing the cablegate documents leaked by Bradley Manning. If you disagree with what someone says, punish them financially – to hell with the freedom of press! As bankers, CEO’s, and other white collar criminals rob everyone blind, Sabu has decided to rob what he calls “white hat corporate journalists” because they have big ol’ corporate accounts and they aren’t starving or anything.

This move is so blindly stupid, so incalculably bad, so patently dumb, the only logical conclusion is that Sabu and his crew are working for the government to make the nebulous Anonymous collective look bad and help hasten SOPA and the oncoming forced Facebookization of the internet.

Merry Christmas! Anonymous is now fully integrated into the hate machine of one country or another and Sabu’s manning the helm, steering for ultimate destruction of the Fourth Estate. Does he work for Iran, the US, or Hamas? No one knows! What’s clear is that he obviously doesn’t work for Anonymous.

 

 

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Occupy Wall Street GASSED in Times Square

POLICE ENFORCE MARTIAL LAW

POLICE IN TIMES SQUARE HAVE GASSED THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF THE 99%

New York–Occupy Wall Street protesters were gassed today by police officers who were covering their badges with duct tape. After being herded into a paddywagon, tear gas cannisters were deployed on innocent protesters who were completely peaceful and in fact already restrained.

Video equipment was destroyed and phones were confiscated by riot police, who also deployed an LRAD sonic crowd control device to control the peaceful protest with rays of concentrated pain.

Peace officers removed sim cards from confiscated mobile devices and stamped them into pieces before protesters before throwing the phones away, presumably in an attempt to destroy evidence of wrongdoing.

New York City is on the brink of martial law, and hundreds of FEMA vehicles were spotted crossing the Brooklyn Bridge earlier today.

Unconfirmed reports surfaced of Black Hawk helicopters being spotted in the skies over Times Square and around Manhattan.

Area residents are reportedly “grateful” for police efforts to bring down the noise level in surrounding areas.

“They just wouldn’t quit with those drums,” complained Marcy Hennegan, 43, a high-rise resident around Zucotti Park.

Protesters were heard screaming out “Why?” while onlookers chanted “Shame! Shame! Shame!” over the sounds of orange gas lines hissing, fed into the open slots of various police vans in the area.

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New Boxxy video “worst yet”

This Sunday Catie Wayne, known for bubbly youtube videos under the alias of Boxxy, released a minute-long video of her new character 3v3. 3v3 is completely indistinguishable from Boxxy except for the fact that 3v3 has some kind of hideous neon rat’s nest in place of her incredibly beautiful dark hair. To top it off, the video is shot in some fucking public place on a damn smart phone or some bullshit while 3v3 yammers on about how she’s recording with the terrible rap group Little Kinky (who are so suck she has to be sleeping with them). Fans of Boxxy have been decidedly pissed and have widely expressed the sentiment that they are no longer fans of anything Catie Wayne touches.

Here’s the terrible advertisement video for Catie’s upcoming shitpile – the only interesting part being a slight tit bounce around :50.

This drech has got to end, Catie.

Fans have to be asking themselves what the fuck is going through her head. The nose ring, the blue contacts, the squid from Uranus growing out of her hair. Now I don’t want to take away anyone’s right to self-expression but this is just a complete trainwreck, possibly signalling the end of Catie Wayne’s internet career. We just can’t possibly be expected to fap to this.

Sorry Catie, but my marriage proposal is so OVER.