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Donald Trump and Melania vaccinated in January, but will remain socially distant

NEW YORK — Former President Donald Erdogan Trump and wifey Melania Trump both received coronavirus vaccines in January, White House advisers confirmed to the Chronicle on Monday. However, the former first lady is opting to remain socially distant, out of an abundance of caution, probably.

The two got their first dose while still in the White House, and have since received their second dose, according to someone wearing a suit and tie. It was not clear which vaccine they received, but Donald insisted on having it injected into the base of his tiny, worthless, child-molesting member.

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GFE: Former US President Trump paid extra for the “girlfriend experience.”

Citing the discomfort prostitutes feel towards kissing certain clients, Melania told her assistant she is going to “play it safe” and avoid Donald until this whole thing blows over.¹

To the amusement of literally the entire world, the Trumps both contracted the coronavirus in late September, with the former president spending a few days on a milking table due to being so weak to the fake virus made up just to hurt him.

Now that they are healthy again, Melania finds herself slowly backing out of the room.

During his presidency or whatever, Melania experimented with methods of greenscreening herself out of awkward situations.

“I am trying not to let on that I am actually leaving, but offering reassuring tones as I make for the exit,” Melania said, comparing her exit to when your ass makes a sound, but you know it’s not a fart. “I don’t want to send up any signals that might cause my loving, abusive husband to give chase.”

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¹their life together
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HAHA 2020 BAD

Hey, how much can you stomach?

I’ll be here all week, folks, so relax, and try to have fun.

Comedy is so funny! HAHA COMEDY BLOG POSTING IS FUN

HAHA FUCKING POLITICAL JOKES

Donald Trump is SICK with MEMES

POLITICS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY ISN’T IT! DOESN’T MATTER HOW HIGH THE STAKES ARE. IT’S A GAG. WE WERE JUST KIDDING. DON’T TAKE IT SO SERIOUSLY, WE WERE JUST ATTEMPTING A COUP FOR A GAG, IT’S JUST BOYS HAVING FUN, CHILL OUT.

Relax! Nothing bad is happening. We just thought we would try our hand at a coup. OK, so it didn’t work. We will see ourselves out. You just gotta throw shit at the wall and see what sticks, right? So the whole right-wing authoritarian coup scenario did not play out. Better luck next time!

Donny Trump was just what AMAZON and WALMART needed. You’ve never seen people BEG for a corporatocracy like Americans in the Trump era. Four years of WISHING for Microsoft. WISHING for Amazon. WISHING for Lockheed-Martin to come back and just fucking drone strike some shit again, in the name of democracy. SPREAD IT LIKE FUCKING NAPALM! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, THAT’S GOOD DEMOCRACY. Odd how it glistens, and sticks to the skin, and burns to the bone. Curious, that.

FUNNY SATIRE

HAHA INTERNET CHRONICLE SO FUNNY, CUTE JOKE ABOUT THE COLLAPSE OF THE AMERICAN DREAM, VERY FUNNY, HEY THE DREAM IS ROTTEN IS STINKING, CAN YOU PLEASE KICK IT INTO THE STREET NOW, IT HAS BECOME UNPLEASANT. IT OFFENDS THE SENSES.

HAHA SO FUNNY ONION ARTICLE ABOUT HAHA GROUP, OTHER GROUP WRONG, OUR GROUP RIGHT. HAHA SO MEME 2020 BAD BUT UH-0H HERE COME 2021 DOGE FACE

 

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Hacker collective Anonymous reveals ‘QAnon’ controlled by “hardcore pedophiles”

A group of ‘hardcore career pedophiles’ originating from the 8chan imageboard are responsible for all official QAnon postings, new leaks reveal

Anonymous is back, and this time they’ve blown the whistle on the secretive Pedophiles behind QAnon
After bypassing QAnon’s Department of Defense shell, which Q uses to make his postings look as if they originate from a source inside the government, the Anonymous hacker known only as a$$hurt backtraced Q’s messages to the Phillippines and a man named Jim Watkins, who appears to be head of the so-called ‘Q project’. 
Watkins is under investigation by the FBI for involvement in the depraved imageboard 8chan and its associated child pornography ring, but he is also the owner and administrator of both 8kun.org and Qmap.pub, which are followed by Q fans as the most authoritative sources for QAnon posts. 
According to server logs obtained by a$$hurt, QAnon’s postings are fabricated by a small team of ‘hardcore pedophiles’. These documents provide lavish details of a lurid and despicable world behind the masked and mysterious QAnon. Each piece of evidence provided by a$$hurt has been independently vetted and verified by both the Internet Chronicle and Wikileaks, which have never made a factual mistake. 
“There is no doubt about Watkins,” a$$hurt told reporters in an exclusive interview with the Internet Chronicle. “His clients at Pacific Internet Exchange also went to jail for child porn … He’s made a career out of purveying [child porn], and only recently pivoted to this ‘Q project’ in a last ditch attempt to avoid extradition and prosecution for his crimes.”
Former 8chan web developer, Frederik Brennan, first discovered that Jim Watkins had full control over QMap.pub on Aug 23, “This is not a drill, people. Jim Watkins is the owner of QMap.pub.” Brennan was the first to blow the whistle on the possibility that Jim Watkins and his team of hardcore pedophiles could have full control over QAnon at any moment, saying, “If he’s not ‘Q’ himself, he can find out who ‘Q’ is at any time.” 

For Q followers, the revelation that their beloved Q is himself trafficking in child pornography has been emotionally devastating. 

QAnon Infiltrators have utterly ruined the movement, turning even the most well-meaning Christians into Satanic Pedos!
Nancy Macadame, widow and former Q believer told the Internet Chronicle, “I knew that Satan worshipers were abusing precious children to gain evil powers, but I never thought their spells could be used against me. I thought I knew better. I thought it was just Democrats and Liberals behind all of this. But Q himself? Bless my heart. I will not be led astray again.”
Other former Q followers are asking themselves why the pedophiles behind the scenes wanted to make so many people hate the Democrats. “I mean I never liked Democrats to begin with. But are the Republicans paying off this fake Q, this Jim Watkins? Are they part of this same child abuse network? I’ve read many things that seem to point towards Trump being great friends with Epstein, but I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. Now that I know about Jim Watkins, maybe I’ll think again. You know, Q may be fake, and so was the plan, the storm, but by GOD we’re going to make our own storm. The pedophiles aren’t going to get away with getting one over on US. Where we go one, we go all!”