Roseanne Barr Commits Suicide after Racism Scandal

INTERNET — Fans mourn the loss of Roseanne Barr, who died from autoerotic asphyxiation Tuesday after her show was cancelled because of a racist tweet. An explicit image of the suicide, posted onto her twitter this evening was very quickly scrubbed from social media sites.

Roseanne Barr was once offended by Jesco White’s swastika tattoo. Her and Tom Arnold paid to have it covered over

A seemingly endless string of celebrity suicide trends are sweeping through social media. Saturday, Chelsea Manning soured her Senate campaign, threatening to kill herself by jumping from a building. George Noory, host of late night talk radio show Coast To Coast AM, died from a DMT overdose just like Joe Rogan.

Jeff Dunam, puppet comic and Roseanne’s close personal friend said, “Fans remembered a Roseanne who grew enraged at the nazi tattoo on Jesco White’s hand. Now that she’s dead a lot of us are wondering where her life took this turn towards evil. I believe it was social media, maybe the Russians. All that time she kept asking me for tips on puppetry, I think she was using it online, running a sockpuppet network.”

Even Wikileaks jumped into the social media trend, with social media editor Suzie Dawson, writing:

Suzi Dawson denies running the WikiLeaks account, but critics say the Forensicator’s language analysis software points to a nearly four sigma correlation between her tweets and those of WikiLeaks.

The Forensicator told the press that they should begin to fear the rise of Suzi Dawson as head of WikiLeaks now that Assange is out of the picture. The Forensicator said, in a live stream press release,  “The startling tweet from WikiLeaks blamed Roseanne’s racial slur on black people who felt insulted. Abject linkage with a stash of pointless emails seems to have fuck all to do with Roseanne. What’s happening here is Suzie Dawson is just manipulating us by means of a mechanical rather than social meaning of language. Hashtags and stories blend seamlessly together for no salient reason. There is no substance but vague suspicions, suspended from a single wire of doubt and dipped into a gobbledygook concoction of current events that taken from afar represent a compromised ethic and standard not only of truth but of justice, liberty, freedom, and basic humanity. Look at what they say they aren’t, in response to nothing. We aren’t authoritarians, we aren’t partisans. Where are the Trump Emails then? Why are they always telling us what everything means, how to interpret their legal cases in a strict and narrow language? It’s an abomination and an absurdity, the late stages of a Lord of the Flies intrigue we can only begin to imagine, and Suzi Dawson is on top — for now.”

Roseanne’s estate was transferred to Tom Arnold, who intends to liquidate and donate all assets to Black Lives Matter and the ADL as requested by Roseanne.

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12 Comments

  1. Hi, christo (a sandwich); what we have is measures, phoning. Time is a rate; we share. Wha’d I hate (a patty melt. A soft “what”) (I’m up here just to do this. Joining) Do it then!! You’re phonies, fuck the white folks! Yeah, but I’m (I met) a relationship with a “hard” fuck you (that base). They know that. The time Chevy shall not exist over the past, peaks. Says in that thing (two is a universal word, not “I have me, too”), firstly.
    Artificial Intelligence is jiggling the red piece, and could you telephone. Add up the what’s YOUTH, and FANTASTIC, AND AN experiment, and (EGG), U (exist and call it flowing dynamic, with points ferried) to these people with their (fears) food, and CLOUD, fog, esta bien, they ask you. They burp it, afraid of loss. Powder, afraid of is drop oaty’s own monkey (set ’em up must be’s) bar. Come crawlin’ in here, sees surgery. Bed folks.

  2. KNK (AND OTHER MISERIES)
    @AnnieKNK
    stop pretending to be a dog on the internet and call your mother

    Ah its haz to be weev trollin’ as a chick, if it ain’t you good ole boys.
    *sniff the air, smells like this is topic for sum 88est radio, ahem excuse me, bhlagdcast.

  3. With Wikileaks and Cassandra Fairbanks in my corner, what could go wrong, I mean right ?

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