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Cloudflare CEO Matthew Prince Praises KiwiFarms for its “epic trolling”

INTERNET — Wednesday, Internet Chronicle Editor-In-Chief Raleigh Theodore Sakers received a distressed phone call from Matthew Prince, CEO of CloudFlare, telling all about his lifelong passion for internet trolling. [Disclosure: The Internet Chronicle is hosted on CloudFlare, and Internet Chronicle writer Jaime Cochran was also a paid troll and hacker for CloudFlare] Matthew Prince, his […]

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Donald Trump’s death ruled accidental blunt force trauma

INTERNET — Fans mourn the loss of former President Donald Trump, who was found dead at the bottom of a staircase at his imperial suite in Mar-A-Lago, Florida. President Trump is warmly remembered for hundreds of firings as the host of the reality television show The Apprentice, his brand of top quality Angus beef steaks, […]

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Shortage of faith leaders and exorcists to blame for demon-inspired school shootings

LUTHERVILLE, MD — Faith leaders across America are reporting a sudden shortage in exorcists and other niche faith services due to hyperinflation, causing a catastrophic rise in demonic possessions and school shootings. This report comes on the heels of the shooting in Uvalde, in which the shooter’s grandmother was targeted by a demon in possession […]