Orthodox visitors have been stunned to see this bold attack on the very religion of Judaism itself.
In what is turning out to be the worst case of popular sacrilege since the Jyllands-Posten Muhammad cartoons controversy, Sunday, the infamous street artist Banksy boldly desecrated the Western Wall with an absurdly simple and gratuitous anti-war message in a contrived media event designed to boost his own brand of so-called “anti-celebrity.”
Orthodox Rabbi Shlomo Amar has called this incident the “Worst outrage since the holocaust, and all Gentiles should be punished unequivocally and without discretion.”
Cultural Critic Slavoj Žižek deconstructed, “My God! It’s as if God has no clothes!”
Conspiracy theorists in Israel have identified “Banksy” as a Muslim citizen of the UK named Hayed Al-Achmed. We reached Al-Achmed for comment, and he denied these accusations categorically and provided proof from his employer that he could not have possibly been in Jerusalem at the time of the blasphemy.
Nonetheless, the already tense and religiously charged situation in Israel has instantly degenerated. Seemingly taking this event as a cue, at least 70 rockets have been fired towards Israeli settlements, and Israel has been accused of launching White Phosphorous munitions from drones onto Exploited Palestinian Ghetto Cities.
Let’s face the facts if we’re going to be a bunch of rational Scientist Atheist fanboys, okay? Neil DeGrasse Tyson is no Carl Sagan or Slavoj Žižek. I’m a cultural critic now, because I watch a lot of Slavoj Žižek, so I’m going to “deconstruct” the hell out of this situation for ya.
I know this is stinking disgusting, hell, it’s racist of me to say this, but it has to be said. White Guilt is the biggest reason Neil Degrasse Tyson has become an internet celebrity rage comic source for Athiest hardons.
Hell, White Guilt is the biggest reason Obama got elected. You won’t see me over with the “Birthers” tellin’ you Neil Tyson’s some kind of a Manchurian candidate raised to this holy pulpit of Scientific-Atheist-Hero-Myth-Religion by the Muslim-Satan-BLUEBEAM-AncientAlien-Agenda, but I will tell ya this. He’s not famous for being smart. Okay, well, he is famous for being relatively “smart,” but we can’t even begin to put him in the same room as Sagan, Žižek, or even that Anarchist Bastard Occupy Cultist Chomsky.
Carl Sagan’s central role and massive contribution to “Space Science” cannot be overlooked.
Sagan was Dir. of the Laboratory for Planetary Studies and David Duncan Prof. of Astronomy and Space Sciences at Cornell University. He played a leading role in the Mariner, Viking and Voyager expeditions to the planets and was a recipient of the Pulitzer Prize for literature. He died in 1996.
He has made contributions to political theory, film theory and theoretical psychoanalysis. “One of the world’s best known public intellectuals” according to John Gray[2], it has been said that “Žižek is to today what Jacques Derrida was to the 80s: the thinker of choice for Europe’s young intellectual vanguard”.
So what contributions, what great scientific advancements, what major accomplishment is Neil DeGrasse Tyson known for most?
As director of the Hayden Planetarium, Tyson bucked traditional thinking in order to keep Pluto from being referred to as the ninth planet in exhibits at the center…this decision has resulted in large amounts of hate mail, much of it from children.
Every time the following glyph is posted to the Internet, Black Tinkerbell loses her wings. But that’s right! Faeries are rarely Black except in fanart. Oh there I go mentioning the race thing again. Wouldn’t it be better if no one ever talked about the undercurrent of racism so it would just disappear from your sweet insulated whitebread suburban internet life?
This is actually the best reason to hate Neil DeGrasse Tyson. Look at how his skin is white here, even though his clearly African features have actually been emphasized by the graphic artist. Freddie Mercury’s rageface is blacker than this (because he’s gay).
Yes, you are dealing with a badass over here. Why doesn’t the Internet understand Tyson is “apart” of the bottom-tier of Public Intellectuals?! He says a few things about Atheists, and all the Atheists who have never even CONSIDERED serious theology or philosophy turn him into some substitute holy man. All hail Neil DeGrasse Tyson, the guy who took Pluto out of our Planetariums!!!1 Bitch, we want MORE planets, not less! Can’t you understand this!? I’d LOVE to have 1,000 planets. WTF is an exoplanet? As if Pluto’s somehow not a part of our god damn Sun’s Timespace Gravitywell. Sheesh! Get outta my Rage Comics, I hate ’em enough already!
CHRONICLE.SU EDITOR MEDIA MOGUL SAID GOODBYE TO GOOGLE SUNDAY FOLLOWING A DISPUTE OVER PAYMENT OF “ASTRONOMICAL PROPORTIONS.”
GOOGLE INC, THE LARGEST CRIME RING IN HUMAN HISTORY, DEFENDED THEIR SUSPICIOUS CLIENTELE OF TACO HUSTLERS AND PRO-LIFE AGENDA FROM LITIGATION SUNDAY AFTER CHRONICLE.SU PARENT COMPANY LEBAL DROCER, INC. DEMANDED PAYMENT FOR ADSPACE FROM THE 1% ON THE LEGENDARY HATE SITE CHRONICLE.SU.
MEDIA MOGUL REPORTEDLY SAID, “FUCK IT!” ADDING, “WE’LL DO IT LIVE,” WITHOUT ENDORSEMENT OF ANY KIND.
“TOO BAD WE GOT MORE PAYMENT IN IRONY THAN THEY COULD EVER GIVE US IN CASH,” SAID CHRONICLE HATEMONGER KILGORE TROUT.
“WE AREN’T QUITE SURE WHAT WE’VE DONE,” REPORTED FRANK MASON FROM HIS DESK IN HAWAII, “BUT SOMEHOW WE’VE PERPETRATED AGAINST THE ONE PERCENT.”
THEY FINANCED TERRORISM.
CHRONICLE.SU HAS OFFICIALLY LOST THE SUPPORT OF MASTERCARD, VISA, AMAZON AND THOSE GUYS THAT FUNNEL GUNS INTO THE HANDS OF POOR CHILDREN WHO CAN’T READ.
CHRONICLE.SU
TERRORIST NETWORK
AFTER GOOGLE COMPLAINED OF THE “ILLICIT CONTENT” [OF TRUTH] FOUND AT CHRONICLE.SU – AND WARNED THEY WOULD PULL FUNDING FROM THE PROJECT UNLESS CHRONICLE.SU CHANGED COURSE – LEBAL DROCER, INC. DELETED THE CODE FROM ITS SERVERS AND FAXED THEM GOOD OLD BOYS AT GOOGLE A BLACK AND WHITE COPY OF FUCK YOU.
LET THIS BE A STRONG WARNING TO THE REST OF YOU WEBSITES WHO DON’T CARRY GOOGLE IN YOUR HEARTS: YOU’RE NEXT.
