Some say Ryan is the second coming of Jesus, a heroic character who freed AnonOps from the perils of evil dictatorial rule by scamming his way into a position of trust. There is little doubt that “Ryan” is controlled by a small cabal of namefags such as JoePie, Kilgore Trout, Billy Walshe, Barrett Brown, Owen, Pseudonymous, Ol’ Brutus, Ronny Nitro, and the shadowy James K Galloway, rumored secret CEO of Lebal Drocer, Inc.  Sacrificial human offerings are made to the altar of Inglip, a terminal where Kilgore Trout deciphers the thousands of Captchas from AnonNews. Inglip speaks to Trout through this oracle.

Ryan is an 18 year old social engineering prodigy who has been pulled into the cult of Inglip. While Trout will not yet confirm that Ryan is in fact the living embodiment of Inglip, he has stated that Ryan is the most talented prophet since Ol’ Brutus. At only 18, Ryan has been able to scam the owners of AnonOps into finally scaring off their dwindling, concerned membership. Ryan stands as an icon for liberation from the shackles of tyranny.

Ryan continues to perform miracles of doxing and hacking so extraordinary that the Feds have totally ignored him out of awe. Aaron Barr has pledged himself to the service of Ryan, forever. Dare any entity attempt to hack back at Ryan, they will face utmost raepage.

Inglip has predicted that the true messiah should be crucified, on cam, aside George Hotz and Kilgore Trout by suited men in Guy Fawkes masks. From there, Ryan will use his direct video link to hijack the minds of billions of onlookers. Because of the unbalanced massing of consciousness, Ryan will begin to implode and re-trigger the big bang. A better universe will be born, full of trollfaces and rage comics.

Today, Anonymous denied doing everything ever. AnonOps has split into factions that are hell-bent on publishing the largest body of lies and personal documents in the history of the world. Meanwhile, the FBI is closing in on everybody who ever used the name Anonymous. Anonymous has since denied that Anonymous even exists. Now that every single Anon has been doxed, there is no longer an Anonymous Anon. Therefore, Anonymous no longer exists, and perhaps never did. Also, all the dox are fake.

Anonymous still maintains that it is morally above data theft and would never condone the attack on Sony. While there is plenty of evidence that implicates Anonymous, this theory is not consistent with the upright reputation for civil disobedience that Anonymous is rightly known for.

There is an army of sockpuppets built to leaked HBGary specifications being used by both sides of the Great Anon Schism. The metalgear is continuously downboating all Chronicle.SU articles and posting lies just for the fun. Anonymous has denied that Chronicle.SU is teh lulz, a final denial that will implode Anonymous into a black hole of self-denying non-existence.

“We never let a bunch of criminals, scammers, and liars take over positions of power and organize Anonymous into some phony IRC where everyone rats eachother out!” – Barrett Brown