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Local Trolling

Microstorms on Poor Mountain

Wind Turbines can catch fire and kill all the ULTRA RARE piratebush found ONLY on Poor Mountain

I knew Old Man Charlie from the days of my youth on Poor Mountain. That old man mostly kept to himself, but when I’d see him walking around on the mountain, he’d talk my ear off. Charlie told a lot of stories, but the ones that always got him worked up the most were the stories of what he called “dem saclones.” Charlie spent a lot of time walking the ridge of Poor Mountain, just to pass the time, but I always liked to ask him about dem saclones.

From what the old man told me, I gathered that he had been experiencing some kind of ultra-rare meteorological phenomenon that may be unique to Poor Mountain. It’s hard for me to go into any detail, but Charlie described clouds quickly forming very close to the ground, twisting like a cyclone. Within the course of a few minutes, an extremely small area would be pelted with up to quarter-sized hail. Sometimes the hail would be smaller, and the affected area could be as large as a house or as small as a frisbee.

Honestly, I never believed that old man. After he died, I wondered a little about Charlie’s stories and eventually researched some information on the internet. I learned that it’s possible “dem saclones” were also called Microstorms. No one on the internet seemed to have seen these vicious kind of tornadic hail Microstorms, and I tried contacting a few meteorologists. None of them seemed to believe the stories from Charlie, and just said that Microstorms were not proven science. However, Poor Mountain surely has great importance as a possible meteorological oddity.

Poor Mountain is located in Roanoke, Virginia, and is currently under threat of industrial development for wind power. Help us, Anonymous. Hack our government into submission for Old Man Charlie and his crazy cyclones. They’re probably real, and when those wind turbines go up, the Microstorms may disappear forever. Have you ever seen what happens when a wind turbine gets pelted with an intense cyclone full of quarter-size hail? Mayhem. Pure mayhem is coming to Poor Mountain if this wind farm is approved. STOP THEM NOW.

 

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
Trolling

Reddit is the world’s largest child porn website

Fans of Reddit often see their servers overloaded with child porn.

Preliminary polling of Reddit users has revealed a shocking statistic – over one third of Redditors are in fact registered sex offenders. A recent post on SomethingAwful, the internet’s best source for gore, rightfully accused Reddit of being the primary hub for trading of hurtful child pornography.

The vast majority of content on Reddit is composed of self-made images by teen and preteen girls. The community often goes out of its way to coerce young women into posing nude and performing sex acts on camera, and the vast amount of this kind of data continually taxes the resources of Reddit.

Formerly, /b/ was decidedly the most depraved web site on the internet. However, /b/’s gore and porn obsession has turned into revolutionary anarchism because endemic egomania brought about the self-mythologizing Anonymous cult. It seems all the disillusioned pedophiles have fled to the welcoming atmosphere of Reddit.

If you don’t want to go to prison and be labeled as a sex offender by association, stay off Reddit.

 

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
Technology Trolling

TehWongz retires from hacking

Charrie Wongz (@TehWongz) was recently kicked out of Destructivesec following his alleged arrest and cooperation with law enforcement agencies. In a recently leaked conference call, agents used derisive terms to refer to Wongz.

Wongz is fifteen years old and has been hacking since he was twelve. He has hacked the online video game service Steam, as well as going on the offensive against his own school. By planting a malicious batch file into the school’s system, he crashed every computer with one swift stroke.

Wongz denies allegations that he is in any way working with law enforcement or that he was ever affiliated with Anonymous. However, he does admit he did have his computer equipment confiscated and had a voluntary interview with police. He is currently campaigning to raise money for a new laptop.

Sadly, Wongz informed us that he has retired from hacking at the request of his girlfriend.