Editorial Hate

Haters of King Cobra plummet to new low point

All my homies love Cobra. We tell Goth Dangerfield jokes to each other around the office while drinking coffee. I take my lunch break and strap his latest streams into the video editor and throw together a few mashup episodes of Star Trek, so what about it? 
Then we all go back to our journalism. We’re writing the first draft of history and lording our power over you sick freaks. You can all get fucked. I’m done with you and all of your communities and glad the subreddits are dead and dying.
Your community will not be missed. You know what we’re  doing on my channel? Not stealing from Cobra. Not jacking to Jessica. I’m Not rebroadcasting the entirety of their streams, while they’re live on the air, and acting like it’s our intellectual property to recast in full, just because I can crack wise on a face cam. No sir, we make original content around here – plug and play is strictly forbidden.
I could simply remove dead air, add some spare sound effects, and highlight a few of Cobra’s comments and call it transformative. Not enough? How about some unattractive color correction. “That’s actually my trademark,” these dudes would say to defend themselves during the lawsuit. Well there’s two people stupider than Cobra. Bitesize Cobra can eat shit. Boglim Chronicles? They haven’t produced a gram of original content in years. Fuck ’em all. Pieces of shit. They couldn’t edit their way out of a soggy paper bag. Yet you get down on the knees, paypigging to these absolute hacks, leeches, BOTTOM FEEDERS who put in literal minutes of work. And you’re sending them money, for what? To satisfy some sick spite that you have for a man who has a mental handicap?
“Fuck sickos” ~ King Cobra
When cornered, facing down this uncomfortable yet undeniable truth, you freaks will say “But it’s not like Josh or Jessica could sue. They can’t afford a lawyer, and not to mention…” but I won’t repeat the insults, the punching down. I hope they do sue, and that they get twice what was stolen. At the very least, show some fucking minimal basic respect for what you yourself are, you decaying boglim species on the decline. You are the rot upon society. There is more hope for humanity in Cobra’s pinky finger than all of you sad, unoriginal fucks combined. Do us all a favor! Log off the internet and stay off of it.
Stealing and condoning stealing from a creator because you believe they can’t defend themselves is some of the most morally and ethically depraved reasoning I’ve ever seen, yet collectively and without reflection, this is what you’ve all become. Fuck you, you fucking sickos. King Cobra will continue to become more famous in spite of the patently false and smug consensus on his decline, and every day the clock is ticking until an advocacy lawyer sees a profitable and righteous cause in your utter financial destruction.
Maybe I’ll make some calls to some of my connections, ask around the office. We’ll set Cobra up, this one should be easy money.
“Clocktower Dreamhouse comin’ in nicely, toobz” ~ King Cobra
Oh, how I would love to see you creeps walk a mile in Jessica’s shoes, Jessica especially. It is beautiful what a soul can endure even in this world. What the love of Cobra and Jessica can endure. I hope they get married and live a beautiful life together and everyone except the sickos find a Jessica of their own.
Long Live Ozzy,
and Fuck The Trolls

10 replies on “Haters of King Cobra plummet to new low point”

This is obviously satirical no one would claim to not be jacking it to methica then go on a tirade such as this where you can hear the friction of their hand on their junk screaming through the keyboard. Ozzy is a Christian and you’re a sicko with a platform.

How did the bog spillage taste while writing this? Did you buckle to your knees so fast and give em a sloppy cobra because you’re a fan? Or maybe in fact, you are impotent and can only serve as a mouth piece. I want to guide you now fallen soilder, look upon fat titties, look upon big ol round cheeks and contemplate its glorious wonder. You have no excuses poor bundled squire of filth. If you are in fact a bottom buddy however, I suggest you tender your needs to a better man with a cleaner can. I’m sorry, but I’m not sorry. Just disappointed, like your father and his ancestors before him.

The intelligence of the author is not needed to be questioned with a response like this. You must own the site and don’t interact socially a lot.

I suggest highly that no one sponsor or advertise on a site that supports sickos. There is no integrity here and it shows

Bitesize monetizing his channel was the beginning of the end. The Cobraverse was a cool hangout before it became about greed.

Leave a comment (or don't)