INTERNET, TWITTER–Today fans of Anti-trolling blogging group the GNAA(Gay Nigger Association of America) were appalled to see their micro-blogging heroes troll unsuspecting victims with satirical rhetoric and what some would call the “weird twitter” phenomenon.
The tweets came from GNAA members @DUTCHMINATI and @methadonna, both well known anti-trolling bloggers were caught multiple times today trolling twitter users with satirical tweets that can only be construed as trolling.
Throughout their long, rich history of being the foremost leaders in blogging, blogging technology and anti-trolling tactics, none of the GNAA have ever publicly trolled until now. This marks a milestone in the history of the internet and is a disgrace to all anti-trolls everywhere.
ATLANTA — Rapper Tauheed Eppz, known to fans as “2 Chainz,” and “Tity Boi,” died Sunday from heart complications related to crack smoking. In his recent single, “Crack,” 2 Chainz said, “Everywhere I go I got crack, I got that crinack.”
2 Chainz came under fire from hip hop enthusiasts who did not believe the rapper, in fact, smoked crack. Hardcore fans of the hip-hop subgenre “Crackcore” spoke to the Internet Chronicle and are even less sure of 2 Chainz authenticity after his death from smoking too much crack. “Us real crackheads, we been at this shit for decades. We know how to handle our crack, and we ain’t out tryin’ to prove nothin’ cause everyone knows we real. 2 Chainz ain’t a crack smoker. That motherfucker is a poser bitch.”
DAMASCUS — Brutal Syrian Dictator and Opthamologist Bashar Al-Assad was assassinated by a disgruntled bodyguard Sunday Morning, as western propaganda alleged his involvement in recent chemical attacks rightfully attributed to so-called revolutionary forces which act as proxies for Christendom. Assad was rushed to hospital in critical condition, but did not survive the gunshot wounds.
Fans of Assad mourn his loss and hope the state of emergency instituted in 1963 will continue in perpetuity. Assad has followed through with promises to appease Arab Spring protesters by further violent suppression of political speech and increasing crackdowns on rebels influenced by western powers.
Kim Jong-Un poured a forty-ounce over the grave of his grandfather saying, “I ain’t gonna forget my nigga Assad, he been sendin’ me dat rocketry ‘n shit, and he always hooked a brother up with Hennessy.”
The assassin was reportedly arrested while screaming, in English, “We are Anonymous! Expect Us!”
DALLAS — Teary-eyed and sobbing like a little girl, Glenn Beck announced that he would personally put his dog down on Sunday. “He is teaching me a very important lesson in dignity,” Beck said, as he shared his shameful emotions with the entire world. “He’s a Mason dog,” added Beck. “Victor’s lessons are ingrained in us forever. Protection, devotion, dignity.” Beck’s technicians were heard giggling in the background.
Beck has spoken of Victor’s blindness in past shows, but reportedly shared many knowing looks with the dog before putting it to death. “Before I owned a gun, I was getting death threats,” Beck said, underlining his continued capability to protect himself from the post-911 anti-American menace.
Glenn Beck learned how to work people’s emotions on the cold streets as a homeless alcoholic beggar, and smoked weed every day for 16 years. After nearly killing himself to the music of Nirvana, Beck joined Alcoholics Anonymous, which became the source for many of his best conspiracy theories.
MORRISVILLE, PA. — New analysis from The Internet Chronicle suggests that the 2012 murder of its editor-in-chief may have been a work of Pennsylvania journalist Vic Livingston. Livingston’s explosive reporting, fueled by an unreal Rolodex of establishment who’s-whos, has yielded exposé after exposé so groundbreaking that many believe there is no other possible conclusion than he has had to cannibalize one of his own to take a place amongst the inner fold. In October Livingston issued an astonishing report uncovering the “brain-fogging” of President Obama during the first presidential debate.
Rumors once again swirled around Mason’s Virginia death after local Illuminati human sacrifice activity was revealed this month by the Richmond Times-Dispatch. The secret society’s ruthless initiation rituals were let out of the bag when would-be victim Thomas Johnson accidentally survived rapper Wafeeq Sabir El-Amin’s sacrifice attempt.
“You are my sacrifice,” Johnson quoted El-Amin as saying before he allegedly fired a shot toward his friend’s head inside a Henrico home that was to become a music studio.
The victim awoke from a drowsy sleep to see El-Amin pointing a gun at his head and saying he needed to be sacrificed, according to the search warrant.
The bullet ricocheted off the victim’s hand sending bone and skin fragments into his eye, according to the warrant, but the victim was able to get hold of the gun and shoot El-Amin in the stomach before he ran off.
[A] sacrifice had to occur in order to join the Illuminati that allegedly incited El-Amin, Johnson said. Investigators recovered from the Athens Avenue home, according to the search warrant . . . literature dealing with the Illuminati and its . . . connection to the music industry.
And as any working journalist can tell you, the reporting game is no less competitive than the rap game.
Angstrom Troubadour, parasociologist at University of California-Berkley, tells the Chronicle that human sacrifice is a routine demand for those hoping to cross the blood-drenched line into the world of “journalism.” Unlike the widely celebrated role of the journalist, that of the blogger is thankless. Substantiating credential means approval of the powers-that-be — at the cost of one’s soul.
“Grassroots researchers, speculating on rapidly deleted Democratic Underground forum threads,” said Troubadour by phone, “have long sought to pinpoint the specific human sacrifices that empowered the media elite. Just how did Matt Yglesias execute Gary Webb to convince Atlantic editors he was for real? MSNBC viewers have long suspected Luke Russert executed his own father to assure a place in the sun.”
But when Professor Troubadour first laid out the latter question in a lecture to the Columbia School of Journalism last fall, many graduate students and faculty expressed skepticism. The late “Meet the Press” host, Tim Russert, they insisted, might have permitted an assisted suicide to ensure his son any prospects whatsoever.
The winter 2012 “panic attacks” that claimed Mason came soon after the editor attracted the ire of Bilderberg attendees and the Club of Rome. In mid-2011, for example, he reported on the signing of the cloak-and-dagger National Defense Authorization Act, which permits the indefinite detention of American citizens.
UPDATE 1:33 a.m. EDT — Hat tip to a Twitter follower who direct-messaged me this amazing Breitbart report from Thursday. Breitbart blogger Ben Shapiro has uncovered that the aforementioned Slate economics reporter, Matt Yglesias, has just purchased a $1.2 million condominium — an impossible task on a writer’s meager salary.
What else to make of reports . . . Matthew Yglesias . . . owns a three-bedroom, three-bath home on Q Street in Logan Circle that clocks in at that hefty sum?
How much is Yglesias being paid to write for Slate?
One point is, Mr. Shapiro, we can really never know. But the better question is: What else is he being paid to do? Or whom?
Chronicle.su field correspondents spotted PyCon drama queen and feminist partying down with hackers and felons alike at a loft in Newark, New Jersey Sunday night, when supposedly at PyCon.
Richards, supposedly took out her feminist ire out on a poor python programming man at PyCon last weekend, getting him fired in the process. He had 3 kids, one is now dead.
She has been the subject of extreme scrutiny since the child’s death and some speculate she may have possibly been committed via 5150 to a mental institution. However, after field reports spotted her at Newark, New Jersey doing pot and swinging from swings, little to no truth is known to be truer than the truth itself, which can only be the truth.
A wave of paranoia swept through the Anonymous consortium late Monday night when #TeamSabu was introduced by Aaron Bale who claims is a group of Sabu sympathizers and synthesizers, led by the OWS and Wikileaks activist shm00p of UGNazi and Rustle League fame, who is actually Sabu himself.
#TeamSabu is lead not only by shm00p, but has close ties to Adria Richards, who sold exploit code to Matthew Keys in an effort to gain the good graces of LulzSec so she could eventually land a job at the DailyDot. Little did she know that among a group of thugs, hackers and drunks, people would be snapping photos.
So who was at PyCon and why the drama surrounding Adria Richards? Simply to distract us from #OpBlackout and Aaron Bales efforts to thwart Jen Emick with Ron Brynaert in tow.
No one knows for certain, but after reading some threads on abovetopsecret.com, we believe this is Illuminati related, considering Luke Rudkowski was at weev’s sentencing.
WASHINGTON — Friday, President Obama returned from a visit to Israel in which he made threats to cut Israeli defense subsidies if Shimon Perez did not make concessions to Palestine. Upon returning to Washington, 23 Republican House members with Tea Party affiliation surrounded the President and fatally wounded him using boxcutters and improvised shivs.
Joe Biden was sworn into office as the assassins were placed into federal custody. All public services have shut down in Washington, and many schools have closed around the nation in mourning.
Sources close to the conspirators claim the House members believed Obama was the Anti-Christ and would soon declare himself Dictator in perpetuity.