Nashville, Tenn.–At 7:49 this morning, one dick eagerly stabbed into a now-legal Miley Cyrus.
With the stink of sex freshly on her clothes, Miley Cyrus told reporters outside her father’s home she is “Ready for adulthood. Really, very ready.”
Asked who took the first legal plunge into her bellows, Miley blushed, and said, “Well, all I can really say for sure is he likes it when I call him ‘Daddy‘.”
Her full spread Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler photo shoots are slated for next month, leading up to a Christmas release that will hopefully stimulate the economy, and our sexual appetites.
Miley Cyrus, a relatively normal-looking child turned on a nation of unbeknown pedophiles and daughter-pimps, breaking new grounds for the Walt Disney corporation and 4chan.
Attorneys are lining up to do blow off of her stomach, and even Walt Disney himself rose up from the grave to “get a piece.”
He said in a statement even though Miley Cyrus has reached adulthood, the distance between his age and hers is still relatively disturbing, adding, “The fact I am so much older is what makes it that much hotter to me.”
Miley Cyrus, named “2008 most-Googled nipslip of all time” by The Elf Wax Times, has completely dropped out of all recent Google Trends reporting and is expected to be forgotten completely by the year 2014.
9 replies on “MILEY CYRUS TURNS 18, n00ds coming soon”
why you got to attack miley cyrus all the time? does this mean now that shes an adult youll leave her alone?
Slap on a little glove, get ready for some love.
Your story was really inmofrative, thanks!
Eating the parfait now. Thank you. It is so good and healthy. I have made quite a few of your recipes and all of them have been awesome. Have a great day.
I don't have a favorite…Pretty much any of them that focus on family and children :) I love learning about different child friendly things and things my daughter would be interested in :) Thank you for this awesome [email protected]
I think I’m actually gonna email this to Miley Cyrus. Or her agent, or something.
you just misquoted a now-dead children’s entertainment icon. this cannot legally be allowed to remain on the internet.
There must be some COA (course of action) that can protect him from this swill.
The Miley Cyrus fanclub is about to receive an email.