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Politics новости

Mitt Romney declares himself “too evil to lose” Michigan primary

Mitt Romney
Mitt Romney asks the niggers to please settle down.

Detroit–Mitt Romney on Friday declared himself the Republican presidential candidate with “the only chance” to defeat President Barack Obama as he seized on signs that rival Rick Santorum’s Michigan campaign is stained with relevant Google search results.

Romney vowed to bring fundamental change to rebuild the U.S. economy with bake sales, a message he hopes will help him make a comeback in the hard-hit state where he spawned from a pool of genetic material, and where Santorum is threatening to harm himself in lieu of opinion polls.

Romney told members of the Detroit Economic Club that if elected he would seek lower taxes for the rich, deep social program cuts, defecit inflation and union busting which taken together would spur a burst in profits for the top one percent.

He spoke from atop a pile of women – all his wives – on the Detroit Lions’ Ford Field, with the crowd, mostly men in suits, seated in recliners set up on the artificial turf. It was an odd choice of venue as the huge stadium could barely accomodate all the greed present.

“I’m not promising that every day will be easy, or there won’t be sacrifice. But I am promising that every day I will destroy your faith in the presidential office,” Romney said.

Romney said he has the best chance among Republicans in what he acknowledged would be a difficult battle to topple Dictator Barack Hussein Obama, who not only has the advantages of incumbency but has a well-funded gestapo capable of detaining opposition leaders indefinitely without trial or due process.

“I not only think I have the best chance – I think I have the only chance,” he said. “Do you see anyone else as evil as I am running for office?”

Michigan and Arizona are the next battlegrounds in the state-by-state fight to pick a challenger to Obama in the November 6 general election. They hold crucial nominating contests next Tuesday and will lay the foundation for the 10 states that vote on “Super Tuesday” March 6 to determine which contenders will fight to the death on Pay-Per-View, pushing the limits of American bloodlust.

Michigan’s widely watched Mitchell/Rosetta Stone poll showed Romney inching ahead of Santorum with 36 percent support to Santorum’s 33 percent. Santorum had recently held a double-digit lead in the state in polls before news surfaced that he may not be corrupt enough to be President.

While the Romney campaign argues he could survive a loss in Michigan, Romney is desperate to avoid another embarrassment in the state where his father was a popular corporate sell-out.

In his speech, he emphasized his Michigan roots and love for American-made cars produced by the state’s car industry, pointing out he drives a Ford Mustang and Chevrolet pick-up truck and wife Ann “drives two Cadillacs, actually,” making everyone around him feel poor as shit.

Categories
Hate

Occupy Wall Street GASSED in Times Square

POLICE ENFORCE MARTIAL LAW

POLICE IN TIMES SQUARE HAVE GASSED THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF THE 99%

New York–Occupy Wall Street protesters were gassed today by police officers who were covering their badges with duct tape. After being herded into a paddywagon, tear gas cannisters were deployed on innocent protesters who were completely peaceful and in fact already restrained.

Video equipment was destroyed and phones were confiscated by riot police, who also deployed an LRAD sonic crowd control device to control the peaceful protest with rays of concentrated pain.

Peace officers removed sim cards from confiscated mobile devices and stamped them into pieces before protesters before throwing the phones away, presumably in an attempt to destroy evidence of wrongdoing.

New York City is on the brink of martial law, and hundreds of FEMA vehicles were spotted crossing the Brooklyn Bridge earlier today.

Unconfirmed reports surfaced of Black Hawk helicopters being spotted in the skies over Times Square and around Manhattan.

Area residents are reportedly “grateful” for police efforts to bring down the noise level in surrounding areas.

“They just wouldn’t quit with those drums,” complained Marcy Hennegan, 43, a high-rise resident around Zucotti Park.

Protesters were heard screaming out “Why?” while onlookers chanted “Shame! Shame! Shame!” over the sounds of orange gas lines hissing, fed into the open slots of various police vans in the area.

Categories
Hate

Project Odyssey controls the world

Every piece of information entered into the internet is funneled into a gigantic supercomputer  built to categorize and prioritize threats to so-called national security. Originally known as Echelon, this system has been upgraded to Romas/COIN. It is now in its third incarnation: Project Odyssey.

The mass-surveillance system uses powerful linguistic analysis to seed out terrorist and activist threats. This capability has been in place since Echelon. However, mass surveillance is the least of the public’s worries. Odyssey is much more.

Project Odyssey weaponizes social media. In countries like Iran, there are thousands of so-called “sockpuppets” subtly inserting subversive messages, creating public discontent. Some have speculated that Odyssey is to blame for the Arab Spring. As such, America is set to profit off of Libyan oil. There is plenty of reason to be suspicious.

Odyssey is not just engaged in foreign affairs. Odyssey is targeting Americans and Europeans. Activist movements that promote ideas unprofitable for business are being infiltrated by sockpuppets issuing terrorist threats. By associating Socialism or Communism with violence and hate, corporations are able to keep their profits on the rise.

A corporate manager can log into Odyssey and quickly access the personal information of any of his or her employees. Should the employee display any deviant or anti-capitalist behavior, they will immediately be fired. This is also how Barack Obama selects White House employees – all past internet use is quickly and efficiently scanned for subversive thought and then monitored closely after hire. Should anyone question the morality of their job from the “privacy” of their own home, they will immediately be fired.

I know they’re using the sockpuppets against me. A fake piece written under my name was distributed to nearly 3,000 people. In this piece, I announce the end to Project PM. I am writing for the Chronicle to dispel this rumor, although I despise their publication and William Walshe. The obvious attack from Odyssey will not go unchecked. My personal group of hackers are working day and night to bring down Odyssey’s computer systems using the stolen stuxnet source code.