Romney Campaign distributes “relief” to GOP offices, Defense Contractors

NORFOLK, VA. — Tuesday, Republican President Candidate Mitt Romney’s second impromptu “relief rally” gathered supplies specifically for naval defense contractors and members of the Republican Party affected by Hurricane Sandy. Four-thousand-dollar cash handouts were disbursed to  naval defense contractors in Norfolk, including leaflets promising future federal grants for shipbuilding and arms construction. Party members in other swing states ravaged by Hurricane Sandy have also been given massive bonuses […]

Topiary Awaits Hearing as Speculation Mounts Hilariously

Every tech nerd, geek and new owner of adult novelties are glued the their news feeds, all asking the same thing: Will Topiary, hailing from the island of Yell, be a hot hipster or a nasty, ugly nerd like Ryan? Most likely, he will fall somewhere in between, and is likely a eunuch. But we’re […]