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Lebal Drocer, Inc. Security Advisory-0001: Cubic Time

Lebal Drocer, Inc Security Advisory-0001:
Multiple Cosmic Vulnerabilities in the Universe

Vendor: Gene Ray (http://timecube.com/)
Product: Cubic Time

Versions affected: ALL
Threat Level: Mauve

Product description:
Cubic Time is a Reality that posits:
"EARTH HAS 4 CORNER 

SIMULTANEOUS 4-DAY

TIME CUBE

WITHIN SINGLE ROTATION.

                                      1 of God Is Only 1/4 Of God."

Finding 1: Gene Ray’s Cubic Time Reality is Truth, but suffers from a Remote Logic Collision(RLC). This new class of bugs has been pioneered by Lebal Drocer, Inc,’s Chief Security Researcher, Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador. “From the outsiders perspective, Ray’s Time Cube Reality is the only absolute truth, but after years of analysis of his cryptic, peer-reviewed text and implementing a small simulation of the Time Cube in a isolated setting– I was able to remotely identify a logic collision which could cause catastrophic events.” he says, “I won’t go into how to crash the universe though,” Troubador said with a crooked smile.

“There are, however ways to use RLC vulnerabilities for the good of the universe and, in turn, mankind. One being, if you applied Hawking’s black hole “Apparent Horizon” theory, using it against a rotating XOR cipher with the gravitational constant, the Time Cube would result in a logic collision, leaking “unmangled” data from the black hole. Essentially, the Apparent Horizon/Time Cube RLC attack can be used to “decrypt” lost data from black holes, which Hawking has said was previously retrievable, yet mangled.”

Patch: Vendor contacted, no reply. Go wild, everyone!

Americans are actually RETARDED from

                                                 Religious Academia taught ONEism

The ONEist educated with their flawed 1 eye

perspective (opposite eyes overlay) Cyclops

 mentality, inflicts static non pulsating logos

as a fictitious queer same sex transformation.

Finding 2: Severe logic flaw in the Time Cube Reality causes cosmic confusion, resulting in Truth segmentation faults to the unaware. Dr. Troubador elaborates, “While Ray’s Time Cube is logically sound at this point, it suffers from a few misconfigurations in its base system of implementation, which can be leveraged to cause a “neuro-modulating Reality slow-torture cluster” to infuse itself into unwitting victims. The logic flaw above shows that Religious Academia teaches oneness, leading to “queer same sex transformations,” which is preposterous, considering God hates fags.”

Patch: Vendor alerted. No response.

Temporary fix/mitigation: Keep reading www.timecube.com for further englightenment.

This advisory has been brought to you by Lebal Drocer, Inc., your very own safe, secure blanket of protection from all dangerous things known and unknown. Purchase our products and pay for our security update subscriptions now, today!

By Jaime Cochran

A kind soul. Works for the X-Games.

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