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Science Special Interest

Lebal Drocer will face ‘serious PR consequences’ for human rights abuses, continuous poisoning of rivers

LEBAL DROCER
Scientists at Lebal Drocer Laboratories declined giving a fuck during an official press conference.
Scientists at Lebal Drocer Laboratories declined to give a fuck during an official press conference.

The American magazine Foreign Policy disclosed shortly ago that a Lebal Drocer soldier who mercilessly killed 16 innocent civilians in Roanoke, Virginia – including women and children – was prone to abusing the reality-altering designer drug TerrorBloc. TerrorBloc, or ‘TB’, is a cheap TerrorMax alternative synthesized by a dangerous offshoot of Lebal Drocer Pharmaceuticals, whose labs operate deep beneath the earth.

For some time, friends and family said, the Lebal Drocer Agent was addicted to alcohol and marijuana before graduating to TerrorBloc, a drug so maddening reports estimate it has caused some 45,000 deaths this year alone, not counting those deaths attributed to dumping Schedule III TerrorMax byproducts into major US waterways.

The new report, put out by the rebel group People’s Army of Lebal Drocer, sheds light on nefarious activities by the Real Lebal Drocer, a subsidiary of Lebal Drocer, Inc. The report shows Lebal Drocer “deliberately” hurled drugs and alcohol into the population without regard for human life or happiness, killing people just for profit.

A United Nations Human Rights spokesperson said 31 nations around the world are organized to take action against the multinational conglomerate and author of the Trans-Pacific Partnership, promising to “push Lebal Drocer out of this century.”

Lebal Drocer’s atrocities have created seven new entries in the Guinness Book of World Records, including setting new records for Most Number of Lives Lost During Single Construction Accident and Highest Stillborn Rate Along a Single River.

Needless to say, residents of Canada and Mexico are not happy with the current state of natural decline at the hands of Lebal Drocer, Inc.

The company is sending an assigned diplomat who will personally take punishment at the international human rights tribunal in Pyongyang, satisfying the bloodlust of his fellow man.

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News

Humanizing Bryce Williams aka Vester Flanagan

Roanoke, VA — Tragedy this morning as Bryce Williams aka Vester Lee Flanagan shot two WDBJ7 journalists at Smith Mountain Lake. Williams was described as a disgruntled employee by the media and as a terrorist by Black Lives Matter advocate Deray McKesson, of course under the faulty assumption that the still-unidentified shooter was probably a white man. Williams was in fact a black man who tweeted that his victims were racist in the workplace. He also once sued for racism in the workplace when he anchored NBC News 40 in Tallahassee.

Now as the community suffers the loss of two journalists who were engaged to be married and Williams is reportedly on the run from my hometown of Roanoke, I have screenshots of Bryce’s twitter feed that tell something quite far from the horrific snuff video. The video contained a terrible meaning more than incredible gore or violence and after making a copy I deleted it. Watching from that man’s point of view in that moment was unbearable.

I don’t know what I would think if I was a black man and saw Donald Trump’s racist horde assembling with pitchforks and all the fleets of big confederate flags on big racist trucks riding around Roanoke, because I’m not a black man.

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US Government moves to repress “Trigger Warning” after it becomes too confrontational

Ann K Sterzinger temporarily hijacked Trigger Warning, posting a story exposing the web site's funding campaign as a scam.
Ann K Sterzinger temporarily hijacked Trigger Warning, posting a story exposing the web site’s funding campaign as a probable scam.

Thursday, Ann K Sterzinger posted an exposé on Trigger Warning detailing CEO Rachel Haywire’s various corruptions and manipulations leading up to Sterzinger’s attempted suicide. The article was quickly removed from Trigger Warning but has been republished on mattforney.com.

Sterzinger describes Haywire as a “narcissist monster” whose constant demands left her overworked and underpaid, in spite of the successful fundraising campaign.

But Rachel Haywire tells a different story, one which implies Sterzinger is a CIA operative enforcing the tyranny of tolerance and limiting freedom by disrupting the one last bastion of free press, Trigger Warning, thereby pushing the official platform of control, Buzzfeed, back to dominance. Haywire said, “I didn’t take the story down and I wasn’t triggered! It was the government, probably the liberals at the CIA that DDoS’d us.”

Cultural Marxist Engineer Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador said, “Trigger Warning is a sandpit run by that harpy robot wannabe, Ratchet Haywire, and she thinks if she can store enough nuts and bolts she’ll extend her life forever. You’ll catch affluenza just looking at the thing, controlled by the single principle that success is money.”