FUCK YOU WORDPRESS. YOU FUCKING OPEN SOURCE PILE OF MORMON SHIT.
FUCKING WORDPRESS IS A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT. You know what else is open source? Religion.
WORDPRESS, I FUCKING HATE YOU.
WORDPRESS ATE MY FUCKING ARTICLE, I PUT UP AN IMAGE AND ALL IT FUICKING SAVED WAS THAT PIECE OF SHIT IMAGE.
“OH, YOU WANTED TO SAVE THAT PIECE OF SHIT DOCUMENT YOU WERE WORKING ON FOR 90 MINUTES? PFFFFUCK YOU, LOL, BUT I SAVED THE IMAGE YOU UPLOADED, IN FACT I OVERWROTE YOUR PIECE OF SHIT STORY WITH IT.”
I DON’T KNOW IF IT’S THIS FUCKING SERVER THAT CAN’T HOLD ITS OWN ASS IN ITS HANDS. I DON’T KNOW IF IT’S OPEN SOURCE WORDSHIT OR THE WHOLE GOD DAMN WHATEVER THE FUCK IS OUT THERE, I WANT TO NUKERAPE THE EASTERN SEABORD.
[Editor’s note: Okay, alright now we are going to write this. I smoked a big old fat thing of weed and now we are going to write an article about]
The state of our world
…digital and otherwise – assuming there’s a difference (based on a paper forwarded to me by Kilgoar, I unconsciously pore over the definition of reality. The paper – originally published in a scientific journal, but now Aaron Swarz’d on this subversive website – stipulated that substantial evidence “exists” to suggest reality as we know it is a computer simulation.
The cat pictured above is exhibiting extra-binary political analysis.
Let’s just say for a second that we do live in a computer simulation designed to reproduce (or produce for the very first time) each facet of our existence – from the evolution of the single-celled organism to mankind, or from illiteracy to telekinesis. Let’s assume that every instance of reality exists not only in probability but in practicality. If we are part of “one” simulation then we may infer there possibly could be many others. Perhaps these alternate realities play out in widening variations – even to the extent we no longer recognize existence in its many otherworldly iterations.
Or let’s just say that’s all bullshit. Either way, does a two-party system actually reflect the needs of mankind?
Even fucking binary code “needs” more than 1′s and 0′s to function. Binary needs a processor.
Our false-binary political system does not allow us to recognize what goes on outside that vote – or that the government itself is a sort of processor, and not the result of voting itself. The processor is designed for certain purposes; all of them acted out, at its most basic level, in binary. And that is how America votes (and the results are menacingly consistent). Republican or Democrat, “left” or “right,” this one or that one, the lesser of two evils, and so on … it is by design that these are our choices.
It is of the utmost importance that we question, at every opportunity, what “reality” is, or is not.
To be, or not to be, that is the question—
This is a classic example of pre-computer false binary. I would have sailed out across God’s green ocean, and to hell with revenge and the idolization of one’s enemies.
http://youtu.be/h7TgTb_0wsg
But Prince Hamlet let himself get wrapped up in the binary when he should have been thinking about wrecking the processors. If you don’t like what your Pentium IV from 1999 is doing, then you don’t delete out a line of code. You replace that motherfucker. I’m talking about a processor revolution, and people don’t think like that. We are taught to think in binary. Yes and no.
So what if you KNEW “everything” was a computer simulation. Wouldn’t you want to play in it? Wouldn’t you be interested in seeing what it can do? Or does being a process relegate us to certain behaviors, certain parameters – certain “rules.” Maybe, right? But isn’t it worth a try?
You can be an inhuman monster just like this man — Read Healthy As Fuck! by Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador, and dehydrate yourself until your skin is nothing but a thin sheet over your muscles. It also decreases chances of ball itch!
CUTHBERT, GA. — Monday, Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador proposed a new Theory of Masculinism at the Camelot University Youtube Lecture Marathon. This field of theory, according to Dr. Troubador, is of course fallible and in many ways quotidian, but nonetheless remains in his jargon, “under-inter-theorized,” due to the inherent chauvanistic nature of Patriarchy and homo-repressed heterosexuality pointed out by Queer and Feminist theorists. Dr. Troubador told reporters, “They’d call us all faggots, misandrists, and privileged white people just for theorizing in this direction, but by God I’m a Heterosexual White Man and I’m tired of being represented by ‘Red Pill’ Monarchists from Date Rape Hell dressing their regurgitated internalized ideologies up as radical philosophy. Plus I’d be on the Queer, Colonialist, Feminist, etc teams if I wasn’t a damned white male. Best thing I can do is learn from ’em and try to think of what their lessons mean to be me, a privileged white man.”
Dr. Troubador slammed his fist on the podium with tremendous hate, “By God there are some sick fucks in the world that I’d love to crush and who deserve the eternal hate of God in hell, but I’m only deranged. A man must look at the world as a war, and it is Hell. Competition is first a madness and second a sacred duty. But this is only the default setting not informed by advances in many fields of Theory. That’s why I’m writing a religious text, using these advances as technology. Our project incorporates a rich inter-theoretical syncretic landscape, fractal mathematics, and persona management propaganda techniques in order to design a religion which will sweep the world in at least one century, hopefully transmitting much of the lessons learned from Theory into the collective conscious and unconscious of the masses. The hate stream of reformation and the more efficient repression of lower animal urges which results will flow into every corner and every government on Earth, and then into the stars. This is the tool through which a civilization becomes a Type I on the Kardashev scale, and building a motherfucking Empire is the space for a White Man like me to set up shop. There’s no doubt they never thought this could happen, or they’d never have said a word!”
Critics of Dr. Troubador, including many he has cited in recent papers, gathered in an ad hoc militia and surrounded his walled compound just hours ago. Local police refused to intervene in the dramatic standoff, classifying the confrontation as a battleground in time of war. The nearby military base in Alansville responded, dispatching at least five Apache assault choppers which were spotted circling Dr. Troubador’s compound, ready to unleash hell on both protesters and Dr. Troubador at the drop of a dime. Let us pray for the eternal salvation of man and that these monsters are completely incinereated in the purified computer guided hate of hellfire missiles.
