Henry Rollins forces himself through a small opening. Internet Chronicle
EARTH–Citizens of the world gathered at the edge of Midas Canal, watching as messages the size of planets were carefully threaded through the eye of a bent sewing needle.
Each word came out thin, bent, shiny, carrying the heat of a star pressed flat and ovular, and stamped with an insignia that many believe carries the weight of one billion promises.
Randy asks readers to “get out of there,” adding that the area was “too snaky.”
Entire galaxies are forced through a pinhole.
Authorities assured everyone that this was fine, but they’re cops and what do they know? The compression is normal, they said, that all big things must be reduced to bite-sized pills – no matter their true constitution – prior to extrusion through the device.
This destroys the sender
Somewhere below, divers reported from the ocean floor that the seabed had cracked under the pressure of entire dictionaries worth of unspoken, unnamed and undiscovered expressions. Their magnificent descriptions of iridescence are owed in large part to hypoxia. Sweet, beautiful hypoxia.
The shadowy archive, Randy said, lies at the bed of the Mariana, resembling the OceanGate submersible in the shape of everything that never fit through the pinhole.
“Also it’s just too damn snaky,” Randy went on to say.
Tourists leaned over the railing, staring at the gap, half-marveling, half-dumbfounded at the quiet power of absence: a canyon dug out not by water, but by the weight of every word without a definition, filled in by the pressure of the substrate itself.
Officials smiled, grinning, bossman style and held a press conference to say that nothing was lost, that every morsel that bubbles up to the daylight is enough to sustain and uphold the grand illusion the shattered wreckage pushed through it before; once whole, now a consequence of the hole. The rest of it remains below, thrumming in the dark, alive, and unacknowledged.
INTERNET – EXHILARATING new developments as Revenge Pornographers LOCK DOWN TANTALIZING LEAKS: GLENN GREENWALD GAY; CONFIRMED!
The raunchy exposé follows YEARS of tedious genocide coverage by the failed journalist, hosted confusingly on Power-Zionist Peter Thiel’s shock news site RUMBLE™. Greenwald had been whining endlessly about incinerating toddler or some such rubbish, but all the while he was betraying their interest – and yours – by soliciting GAY ACTION.
Thiel complained to Chronicle, “I-I-I-I-I- I just told him to…. To…. to stop! I said, I said GLENN. We- you- I- w- you can’t do this! I can’t host this! You think- you think- what, you think it makes any difference if- if- if- if you’re Jewish? Buddy, that’s precisely who they’re locked in on! You think I want these people coming after me?! You… I… You… There’s a very strict protocol for these business arrangements. I-I-I-I- I told him…. Glenn! You have to STOP!”
Get ready, because what you’re about to see next on this web article will chill you to your very bone. Glenn Greenwald in dainty maid and skirt pantyhose gruesome fetish FUCK
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Image pixelated to protect victims (You.) Face of Greenwald maintained for public interest.
I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE IT, CAN YOU? WILL ANYTHING EVER BE THE SAME AFTER THIS?!
The breaking story reached front desk of Lebal Drocer CEO Raleigh T. Sakers who all but confirmed Mossad was behind the hit. “This is almost certainly Mossad’s doing, I go golfing with the guy who keeps hold of this filth. He has his own private server.Petabytes of the shit.
“But you listen to me cockroach, I’ve been happy to let the Chronicle slide into irrelevance to avoid precisely this type of scandal. You think I want my good friends smeared in my own paper? Not a chance! We’ve got a fundraiser coming up for the annual Fair Saint Louis Parade and I do not want our biggest donors unhappy.
“If you so much as think of publishing even the faintest allusion that Mossad is behind this? You better believe you’ll be the next one in tight panty girdle on the front page of the New York Post! Oh, what’s that? No such thing exists? WHAT DO YOU THINK WE HAD THAT AI BUILT FOR? WRITING ARTICLES? GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!”
Auernheimer’s public profile may never recover from his association with degenerate Glenn.
Long time collaborator and heterosexual icon Andrew “Woiv” Auernheimer was shocked and appalled, “this whole time I thought Glenn was Aryan and straight, but it turns out he’s Jewish and gay? What the fuck, man!” Greenwald did everything in his power to rehabilitate Auernehimer’s public image after a neo-nazi hack gone wrong, but it just wasn’t enough. Old wounds now re-open, and the salt inserts directly, “it’s given me a lot to think about that’s for sure! HAH! HAH! HAH!”
None were more bothered by it though than old friend and collaborator Ethan Klein of h3h3 fame. Klein recently fell into a heaping pile of dung when it got accidentally revealed his wife “Hila” Klein was a former raider in the Israeli Defence Force. The controversy saw users haemorrhaging out of his podcast – and spondulix out of his pocket. Klein worked quick to control the damage, but it just wasn’t enough.
In a last ditch attempt h3 swallowed his pride and solicited donations for Palestine, but accidentally gave all of it to Ahmed Fouad Alkhatib, a Palestinian, yes, but sneakily employed by the Atlantic Council, direct facilitators of the democide. With no where left to turn, Klein’s only hope was a puff piece at the intercept from him old chum Greenwald Glenn, but it turned out he was batting for the other side.
Klein became aggressive on stream after his hypocrisy was revealed.
“After all these years my good friend Glenn Greenwald can’t even lift a finger to write some positive press about me? It pisses me off!”
“For months on end now he’s been brow beating me, Ethan your perspective’s all wrong, Ethan you’re on the wrong side of history. Ethan. Ethan. Ethan. Ethan. But the whole time this is what he’s doing? Maybe those kids deserved to die if this is who’s really pushing their agenda!”
Trump signed his landmark “Forget 9/11” mandate during a mid-May trip to Saudi Arabia.
WASHINGTON, D.C.—While en route to Saudi Arabia on Monday, President Trump issued an executive order denyingradar access to air traffic controllers across the nation, endangering the lives of tens of thousands of airline passengers.
During his speech President Trump did an impression of Falling Man, a Patriot Saint of what was once a national holiday, now forgotten.
President Trump addressed fans via exclusive, subscriber-only Starlink stream on Truth Social, “9/11 was a terrible, terrible time for New York, for America. But we can’t keep up with all this radar, it’s too much radar of the wrong kind frankly and we don’t need anymore radar. We might have to think about punishment for these people who can’t forget about 9/11.”
Friday morning, air traffic controllers directing planes into the Newark, New Jersey, airport briefly had their radar jammed by military jets. The administration says this marks the second time in two weeks an air traffic controller got mixed up and brought their gaydar to work, highlighting the important and sophisticated methods being used to sniff out and remove the different ones.
White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavittwas filled with hate, telling concerned reporters that remembering 9/11 was “DEI bullshit that interferes directly with God’s Plan. It‘s time for America to let go.”
The FAA said the radar at the facility in Philadelphia that directs planes in and out of Newark airport “went black for 90 seconds,” a fact the Trump administration cites as a pivotal structure in their oddly specific argument against inclusion in who gets to decide where planes go.Leavitt said, “Philadelphia is where Tom Hanks died slowly of AIDS, in the movie Philadelphia.”
Trump called the performance “really something else.”
“They engendered many lives today in Newark, in Philadelphia,” Trump said. “I don’t want to say what kind of lives they were, maybe they were good lives. Maybe they mattered.”
“We’re going to save millions of dollars not running the air traffic control lights and radars full time, and now, with Trum’s new order,” Leavitt said, “We can finally forget.”
“Forget about it.”
The order also includes earmarked funds charging local police with increasing national happiness metrics, which officially goes into effect June 19.
Analysts and experts are struggling with a new, more profound question: What other laws can Trump undermine? Natural law? Is it possible that Trump laws could threaten the fabric of math, science, or even reality itself, by denying funding to Universities?
Jason Mayhew, a 21-year-old graduate of the Richmond University School of Political Science, said he and his team are researching a new method of law that would – through sheer tyranny of state – enforce the legal numerical value of 1 to -1.
“If our proposal goes through,” Mayhew said, “You’d see a complete reversal of the historical record. Time would move backwards, and we would watch world history refold and funnel itself all the way back into a concentrated point of matter preceding what the woke liberal media refers to as a Big Bang. With all the work we’ve been doing, my team is excited for the very real possibility of the total annihilation of existence itself.”
