MOSCOW — Edward Snowden, grand wizard of leaking, was recently granted asylum in the USSR, ending his term as President of Sheremetyevo Airport. One of the conditions for asylum allowed by the Kremlin is that he could not, in fact, leak anymore information about the U.S. governments spying programs. Luckily, in a brilliant contingency plan […]
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Snowden’s death comes on the heels of an announcement by US President Barack Hussein Obama that the 2011 PATRIOT ACT is being dialed back, along with programs by the NSA and DARPA.
HAWAII — Duane Chapman, better known as Dog the Bounty Hunter, announced plans to enter Russia illegally in order to capture fugitive whistleblower Edward Snowden. Dog, in an impromptu press conference held outside Da Kine bail bonds, said, “Sometimes you gotta bend the rules to save America, and if I can catch this traitor Snowden […]