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Obituaries Society

Ghislaine Maxwell found dead in apparent suicide

“Hanged in her cell.” — CO Report

  • DOX NEWS: Reports of the death of Jeffrey Epstein estate madame casts doubts as to whether the names of more powerful offenders will ever come to light.
  • Infamous “little black book” still with authorities.
  • Leaders warned of “sweeping implications”

NEW YORK—Early reports state that guards working at Brooklyn Metropolitan Detention Center in New York have discovered the body of former Jeffrey Epstein estate madame and prolific human trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell. The correctional officer’s report states that following a power outage, two guards later found Maxwell hanging in her cell, after being left unattended as workers investigated the cause of the outage. She was 60.

Her family said they feared for her life in February, when Jean-Luc Brunel, another associate who worked with human trafficker and child rapist Jeffrey Epstein, was found dead in his Paris cell.

Reports indicate there is no footage of the event.

Warden Jeremy Whitlock said, “The batteries in the cameras monitoring Ms. Maxwell’s block failed, and so no footage of her suicide was obtained.”

Ghislaine Maxwell, pictured with Jeffrey Epstein, is dressed like the Captain of child abuse.

Internet watchdog groups and skeptic tanks think Jeremy Whitlock says a lot of things, and have sounded the alarm. A group known pejoratively as “truthers” are reportedly amassing a caravan of campers and minivans, with the stated intention of moving their group of an estimated 300 transients onto the White House lawn by next weekend.

The group, calling themselves the Maxwells, hopes the stunt will draw attention to the obvious protections from justice established by a global elite class of criminals. Unfortunately, the tired and drug-addicted people involved do not seem ready to say words like that out of their slack-jawed, open mouths. Standing tall, and waiting ahead of them is a theatrical regimen of National Guard troops, armed and looking for anything out of the ordinary. However, the Maxwells are not deterred.

Jamie Jo Corne (Jamie Brinkman)
Trailboss Jamie Jo Corne

A Maxwell, and user calling herself Trailboss: Jamie Jo Corne (TBJJC) registers orders to a loyal following of federated truck drivers, over a media platform recently launched by Donald Trump. She also uses a CB radio to spread her message, the post says, which is “received by a cacaphony of ‘amens’ and 10-4s.”

“We’ve heard all we need to hear about the so-called facts,” Corne writes in her statement. “This molester died, and she knew all the names of the world’s most elite child rapists, and we’re supposed to believe she did it at the exact moment that the fucking lights went out? What’s it going to take to put a fire under the asses of every senator, statesman, and known devil-worshipping child sacrificer in the capitol?”

The post received hundreds of likes and reposts, which is a lot on Truth Social.

Ghislaine was survived by her four siblings. Brother Max “The Beast” Maxwell told reporters, “She was innocent, I tell ya. Innocent. All this child trafficking QAnon bullshit can suck my cock. Suck my cock from here to Timbuktu. Now fuck off!”

[Editor’s note: these remarks were left out of the Hate Radio Morning Edition broadcast, but are included here for posterity.]

Sick fans mourn the loss of the most prolific known human trafficker and rapist Maxwell. Devotees know that Maxwell, in addition to hurting children – and perhaps overshadowed by the cruelty of her crime – also went after men.

Information taken from court documents reveal that Ghislaine was admired in certain circles for her second life as a serial rapist, approaching over 36 men on various social media websites including Myspace, Facebook, and YouTube. Her posts included detailed information about her favorite manipulation regimes.

After first bamboozling a target with sex-bombing, she would then crank the hate down on them with a practiced emperor-palpatine like command. By stages she would break their will down to nothing. Finally, she would lure them into abandoned buildings, cut their dicks off, make plaster castings, thus adding to her collection of limp penises, and thus increase her own perverse enjoyment.

“It was fucked up,” says Albert H. Troiler, the lead investigator wrote in his report to the New York District Attorney after working the case. “You never seen nothing like it.”

Proceeds from The TerraMar Project, a foundation Maxwell created to conserve the world’s oceans, are being turned over the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, a portion of which the Gates say will be spent toward ‘Save The Children.’

Melinda French Gates, former wife of Bill Gates, said “We want to regulate the trafficking of children. Make sure it’s done ehtically, legally, so people can be safe about it. No more black markets for children, but safe spaces, with legal barriers to abuse.”

The coronor’s report might not come out for months, as investigators process new details, still coming in.

“Or we mignt never hear nothing at all,” Corne writes. “They might just sweep this whole thing under the rug, and pretend for 20 years like she’s still alive and well, up there in Brooklyn, hanging out with her rich prisoner friends.”

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News

Jim Watkins, Founder of QAnon, Dead at 58

INTERNET — Fans mourn the loss of QAnon Founder Jim Watkins who was found dead in his Manila apartment Monday after an apparent overdose of Fentanyl. This comes just weeks after investigators found Watkins’ “digital footprint” on the latest Q Drop, proving beyond all doubt that Jim Watkins was controlling QAnon’s official narrative.

Watkins is survived by his son, Ron, who posted a Tik-Tok video  saying, “Dad was a guiding light of chan communities. He started a whole culture with 2chan and took it to its final, most free form with 8chan. Today is truly a tragic moment for my family, but also for Liberty.”

Ron drew a katana from his back and flashed it for viewers, “I will avenge my father with this blade, which was passed to me from my grandfather, and to him from his grandfather, for 18 generations. I will carry the flame of 2chan and 8chan onwards and one day, I might fill his shoes.”

Authorities investigating the death are open to the idea of homicide,  but not committed to anything yet. “Fentanyl is the most poisonous substance known to man, capable of killing a full grown adult like Mr. Watkins, even if he just brushed up against it, and considering the news about Q, we are definitely investigating this as a homicide,” said Chief O’Brien Sallisaw, “And trust me, there is going to be sex trafficking, child abuse, SWATtings, doxings, blackmail, and everything you’ve come to expect from these shitty chan web sites.”

QAnon supporter and former colleague of the deceased, Joshua Moon, told reporters, “Well I just believed no comms off the boards always meant Q could be trusted, but it turns out Jim just wanted to control the narrative.”

Moon stressed that the movement still wasn’t over, now that its voice was so thoroughly and completely discredited, saying with absolute  conviction, “What we built was real, we’ve learned a great lesson, and Q will go on in a newer, better form. Trump is the only true savior, forget about Q. The storm is still coming, one day.”

 

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Donald Trump’s death ruled accidental blunt force trauma

INTERNET — Fans mourn the loss of former President Donald Trump, who was found dead at the bottom of a staircase at his imperial suite in Mar-A-Lago, Florida. President Trump is warmly remembered for hundreds of firings as the host of the reality television show The Apprentice, his brand of top quality Angus beef steaks, and his appearance in Home Alone 2: Lost in New York.

Coroner Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador told reporters, “He wasn’t too healthy to begin with, and we found him at the bottom of the stairs with bruises all over his body after he suffered a cardiac arrest.”

When asked about any indications of foul play, Dr. Troubador told reporters, “If there was any foul play involved here, it was the criminal amounts of sodium and fat in the fast food diet that Trump was living on for so many decades.”

Fans and haters across the nation gathered for vigils and protests which erupted into confrontations, violence, and the desecration of sacred memorials.

QAnon founder Jim Watkins was arrested with his son Ron Watkins at the Arlington National Cemetery moments after a failed attempt to extinguish the eternal flame at the grave of President John F. Kennedy.

Witnesses said the elder Watkins stretched his arms to the sky and screamed, “The storm is upon us!” as lighting blasted across the Washington DC skyline. Watkins fell to his knees where he began shuddering and mumbling, “JFK! Q++! 4, 10, 20, CLOWNS! Pres is not dead, I repeat, Q+ is not dead!”

The younger Watkins’ eyes grew wide with surprise as he announced to onlookers, “He has channeled the voice of Q, the authentic voice of Q! Glory, Glory! Trump lives!”