axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
Hate

Reddit – the world’s most trolled social network

Every day some troll’s pity story is voted to the front page of Reddit. Apparently, there’s good money to be made from trolling such a gullible social network. Everyone on Reddit believes anything!

“Oh, woe is me, Reddit. I’ve moved out because my parents were tyrannic christians and life is so hard/I had to get an abortion. Please buy my book/reddit gold. It’s about a narwhal who fucks a robot to death and kills the tea party forever. Give me tons of up votes so I can laugh at you circlejerk candyasses. tl;dr atheism ron paul hurrdurrr.” ~ Reddit Troll

 

“It feels so good to upvote that  Mmmm yeah, doing something good for the world right there.” ~ Average Redditor

Reddit agrees – “You can help someone by upvoting!”

 

4chan has the kind of trolling awareness Reddit and other social media sites completely lack. Liars and trolls scam gullible Redditors every day. When ‘newfags’ on /b/ get trolled, it’s only part of a learning process. The creation of new copypasta and other memes is the aim of any true oldfag /b/tard. Reddit only gets creative to get points in a made up “karma” system that doesn’t mean anything. Redditors commit vile acts of fanboy sin in the process of acquiring “karma.”

This pizza looks like shit.
Hi, my hobby is photoshopping ridiculous Reddit bullshit onto camgirls for "karma" points
This is Reddit's favorite meme because they're all stupid fucks who can never tell if they're being trolled or not.

Editor’s note: I am, of course, an occasional Redditfag myself. I can’t help but be drawn to the one good rage comic per day, buried in layers of fail comics that aren’t really comics but people’s sad stories. Reddit is continually trolled into oblivion and I occasionally do my service for them. All those ugly chicks in /r/gonewild getting praised by karma whores, all the watered down memes. It’s not just that I have a thing against Reddit down voting most Chronicle articles, it’s that I know how to social engineer them to get the up votes. If /b/ is a bunch of coked-up lemmings, Reddit is a load of sperm ejaculated by a meth addict. You just have to give them meth. The little spermies sing, “when does the narwhal bacon? midnight.”

Extra credit: Cross-post good trolls on Reddit to 4chan and tell all the Redditfags to GTFO when they rage out and accuse you of cross posting from Reddit.

 

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
Status Quo

PRESSTORM SCRAMBLES TO SUPPRESS TRUTH

Internet– Jamie Jo Corne, real life journalist and publicist for presstorm.com, tragically resorted to posting nude photographs of herself via flickr after church Sunday following a bout with bulimia and self-hatred.

Mr. Corne, the editor of cesstorm who goes by @vincubusdante, came up with the idea while collaborating with outside experts on the matter of manipulating search results to save face and suppress dissent. [LEAKED AUDIO BELOW]

Inside sources close to presstorm suggest editorial duties have fallen upon the ancient @vincubusdante because his babymachine is too busy providing milk to the sucklings to defend herself.

Using Murdoch-approved hacked phone records and coercion techniques, Chronicle.SU recovered the actual phone call taking place between Mr. Corne and the Internet Police:

Leaked Presstorm Audio by ChronicleSU

axisflip cryptofinancial

Categories
News

Own Up To Being Owned

I do believe, if you don’t like things you leave for someplace you’ve never gone before.

bah, bah, bah bah. Ooh. Honey, I found a reason to keep livin’. And you know the reason? Dear, it’s you. And I’ve walked down life’s lonely highways hand in hand with myself. And I realize how many paths have crossed between us.

[pullquote]I do believe you are what you perceive.
What comes is better than what came before.[/pullquote]

The anarchist in me wants to watch it all go to shit. The computer geek doesn’t want to sit up all night with a shotgun pointed out the window. Pointed at the door. Waiting to squeeze the trigger just as soon as I see the rape in my neighbor’s eye. No sir. I like my peace too much for that.

I’d rather repair what’s here. And that’s why I want to catch a congressman – or many – selling their votes. I want to expose the piece of shit legislature owned by multinational corporations. I want to jab a needle right in their fucking eyes so for once they have to smell the sewer they’ve created. The sewer called America.

I want to disown Congress by stealing it. I may be killed. So be it. You know who I am. Know also that I am coming.

Reflecting, I see that you see and we all see it’s just an empty, masturbatory promise; rest assured, I know the guy who knows a guy, and I’m coming in. Meanwhile I too rest assured and remain absolutely positively certain that masturbation comes not without its payoff. I come for a purpose and I’m about to impregnate your whore daughters of the dollar with the cold hard seed of truth and we’re all going down like sun setting on life itself. That’s you. Me, in a blaze of glory. You, in a blaze of flashbulbs and media shame leading up to cancer and prison hospitals. You, in a maximum security hellbox where you’ll spend your days writing to lobbyists and shareholders telling them how bad the food sucks and buying my hit on layaway. Well, let’s do it.

Your days are numbered, capitalist pigs. These anonymous tryhards can blog all they want and I know I get lumped in with them. The difference with me is I am committed to joining your ranks and ousting all of you by becoming one of you. The process has already begun. Funny to me is knowing you won’t read this warning.

See my face up there? Watch for it. I’m nice, I’m funny, I’m a backstabbing sociopath piece of shit and I’m gonna fuck you with a smile. You have two years. And then I’m coming for you.