Possible Breitbart Coroner Murder Like When Katrina vanden Heuvel and Jane Hamsher Argued about Vince Foster and the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict

LOS ANGELES – The fear generated by the death of a man Internet spectators thought could have been the coroner for recently deceased right-wing pundit Andrew Breitbart is evocative of when Firedoglake Publisher Jane Hamsher and The Nation Publisher Katrina famously argued about their respective coverages of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and the death of Vince Foster.

One day in August of 2010, Nation Fellow Philip Weiss wrote an article accusing Firedoglake of ignoring issues of Palestine, claiming that Firedoglake was too bent to the will of Israeli ultra-nationalists.

Ms. Hamsher would respond, “FDL is 1 of the ONLY left blogs w/someone writing abt Palestine (Siun) & you’d have 2 be a f&^%king r#%ard not to Google that.” Added Ms. Hamsher, “So @KatrinaNation is paying Vince Foster conspiracy peddler @MondoWeiss to attack “professional left” now. @NationInstitute must be proud.”

Ms. Hamsher’s “professional left” comment was an allusion to a comment by then White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs derogating President Obama’s ideological critics in the press.

Philip Weiss is, at least as of April of last year was still writing for The Nation. He described his own frustration with journalistic colleagues who rejected him for failing to accept his conclusions, or lack thereof, regarding the death of Foster.

I wasn’t trusted to write about politics around that time. ‘You’re over-determined,’ one writer said with condescension. I thought I was just a reporter. And Joe Klein had said as much novelistically, in Primary Colors.

So I was grateful to Bill Clinton when he capped his Administration with an act of corruption, absolving Marc Rich, for all to see.

I was hugely grateful to both Clintons when they turned her campaign into an Ahabish pursuit of power, a race-a-thon, an impeachment-grudgematch, a mad grind for Bill’s redemption, and showed that they would do anything. Again: for all to see.

And I am now personally grateful to Hillary for exposing the violence and thuggery that exists at the cold black bottom of her politics, for all to see. Her wish-fulfillment statement about assassination reminds me of the night I got back from my first trip to Little Rock in 1996.

Hillary Clinton with Vince Foster

Hamsher would charge that keeping Weiss as a Nation fellow — in effect paying him to write –amounted to “intellectually lazy limousine liberal effete wankery.”  She would compare Mr. Weiss to extremist or at least disingenuous commenters at Firedoglake.

“Hey @KatrinaNation,” wrote Ms. Hamsher, “we banned some 9/11 trolls from our comments last week. You can have em 4 Nation Institute Fellows if u want.”

The comments section at the LA Times after the death of a supposed Breitbart coroner  evokes that 2010 discourse about The Nation’s coverage of the Foster death and Firedoglake’s Southwest Asian news coverage.

Russell Taylor wrote: “The quickest way to commit suicide? Know some dirt on the government, and even think about putting it out to the public.”

Another party compared the coroner’s death to that of deposed Libyan leader Muammar Gadhafi: “I’ve been wondering as an aside what Khaddafi had on the US Government that led to him being double crossed the way he was, and WHY he did not plan for such an event by entrusting information with a secret 3rd party as ‘life insurance’

Mr. Taylor elaborated on his beliefs: “Ever notice that people investigating possible political crimes, either come up with no results from those investigation, or they quit breathing before announcing results.”

But it was by April 20th that the Los Angeles coroner’s office had already issued a report — a report, if not a final report — announcing that the conservative blogger had died of hardened arteries.

Also at the LA times, user “Obama EATS DOGS” wrote:

Obama Death Toll (so far)….. 3 gay choir members at Trinity Church in Chicago, where Obama attended Rev Wright’s sermons for twenty years. Plus one Kam Kuwata (Democrat Strategist and Dianne Feinstein best friend) who went missing and was found 2 weeks later, dead inside his Venice Beach home. Plus Andrew Breitbart who died “of natural causes” in LA. And NOW, the LA Coroner who (possibly) helped investigate Breitbart’s death gets poisoned to death with arsenic, the same week the Breitbart autopsy report is due for release!

Here at the Ulsterman Report is more on the theory that Kam Kuwata was assassinated.

Despite the fact that Vince Foster died in 1993, Eva Harper wrote:  “Don’t forget Vince Foster, friend to the Clintons who was killed during the 2008 campaign cycle…”

Mark Flaming, on Facebook, a self-described “Hebrew Slave at Offshore Oil/Natural Gas” found incredible claims that the coroner had died while amidst recreation. “Due to a hobby’?” he wrote. “What was his hobby? Eating poison? I think he knew more than the current administration thought was good for him (or them),” adding, “I wonder who’s going to fall over dead next? Probably whoever investigates his murder! Arsenic anyone?”

A 28th of April Facebook posting suggested Mr. Fleming may have possessed a deeper, abiding instinct regarding those of greater melanin content. Commenting on an Alabama killing alleged to be a race-based retaliation for the killing of Trayvon Martin, Mr. Fleming wrote on Facebook, “Blacks are the biggest and worst racists I know.”

Ray N Felitto III wrote:

The Trinity United choir leader was a man named Donald Young who happened to be and was also known in the Chicago ghettos and dem circles as Obama’s pre presidential gay lover or at least one of many. Even Young’s mother has confirmed all this as truth, but the media is of course AWOL even this time around. Just like they will be here. Also No coincidence. http://bit.ly/ctzVit

With respect to the dead choir members, “Ray N Felitto III” is referencing reporting done by the Globe, on display at rense.com; as well as the Wayne Madsen Report.


New algorithm forces Reply Girls into “creative renaissance”

Reply Girls, a much-hated YouTube phenomenon, were a small group of highly-successful YouTube marketers making use of excessive cleavage and “gaming the system.” By replying to the most-viewed YouTube channels, Reply Girls reached massive audiences with videos that rarely contained more than an excessively attractive pair of breasts and a “Hey guys, I liked this video, leave a comment.”  

In March, YouTube improved the related video algorithm, cutting off Reply Girls from their “audience,” who were mostly hormonal young boys enraged that they had been tricked into viewing a totally pointless video. YouTube reply channels were sometimes the sole source of income for the young women, and gaming the old system was probably the only way they ever got a single view. Since the change, Reply Girls have done their best to adapt to this new environment by reassessing the weaknesses of their old methods and trying new things. None have found the same success they once leeched from popular YouTube channels such as Yogscast and Machinima, but some have found actual approval from their audience. Prominent Reply Girls LauraSparkling, TheReplyGirl, and MeganSpeaks have taken wildly different directions, but all have changed drastically for the better.

LauraSparkling, known for her terrible dancing and worse singing, had already branched into “parody” music videos and absurd emotional breakdowns before the algorithm change. However, she has since deleted the entirety of her previous body of work and started an entirely new channel, LauraCaptured. LauraSparkling’s new direction seems to be quickly edited videos of her at her most bubbly, with the expected footage of horses and bad dancing. She’s decided to block out all the “haters” and apply herself a little more to the editing process.

TheReplyGirl, possibly the most hated of the now “defunct” Reply Girls, faced open harassment from the YouTube community and pranks from hackers after making this video which tearfully addressed the change in YouTube’s algorithm.

Since then, TheReplyGirl has found the most success speaking out about political issues like the war on drugs. It’s interesting to note the way TheReplyGirl has changed her video framing. In some of her videos, she has experimented with extreme angles accentuating her bust, and in other (more successful) videos, she positioned herself at a more appropriate distance and gestured to help convey the meaning behind surprisingly substantive dialog.

MeganSpeaks, the most resilient of the Reply Girl cabal, openly joined the attack on TheReplyGirl and forswore making any further reply videos. Despite making hundreds of these type of videos, MeganSpeaks maintains that it was all an ironic attempt to troll TheReplyGirl. Of course, this kind of “irony” can be dangerous.

Since this video, MeganSpeaks has staged an Anonymous hoax, faked her own retirement from YouTube, started her own abject Minecraft channel, and recorded some really interesting “workout” videos. This one is titled “AMAZING BUTT EXPERT TEACHES YOU ARM WORKOUTS AND LEGS TO PUNCHING EVERYWHERE.”

Even with this relatively successful “shotgun strategy,” MeganSpeaks has taken a massive hit in views. However, she still maintains the biggest following of any Reply Girl since the algorithm change.

While the Reply Girls struggle to survive in this new and more daunting world where the content of their videos actually matter, the haters seem to have been appeased. Those who love to hate Reply Girls have all focused on harassing TheReplyGirl, liberating the others.

Am I a troll?

It was December 2010, and my plans were anything but simple: Grab the world by the horns, pull up my bootstraps, and make some kind of artistic statement that just might possibly quell my existential butthurt. That is, until Anonymous once again reared its head. I became obsessed! Here was some kind of mysterious cyberentity speaking truth to power, and that’s exactly the kind of thing I love.

In early January, I logged into AnonOps with the intention of confronting Anonymous about their use of imagery. For a group of “activists,” I felt it was a little bit on the threatening side and pointlessly destructive to their cause. As an artist, I wanted to help! However, I quickly found out this topic was taboo, and that discussion among this “collective” was strictly controlled, if not by a single individual, then by a loose-knit group of channel operators. Speaking about the wrong thing will get a person labeled a troll right quick, and trolls get banned.

Well, to hell with IRC.  There were other places I could take this discussion, such as AnonNews and later Twitter. I could make it outrageous, viral, and rub their face in their own shit while they cried “I don’t smell a thing!” Hell, I had my own sad little satire blog to soapbox from, so why not use it? I embraced my role as a “troll,” and in many ways it was empowering. But I was not just playing a game of revenge, pissing off Anonymous in reprisal for their rejection. I was provoking discussion. Anons often said that infighting made them strong, but they still hated me and considered me a “shit-stirrer” and a “troll.” Like I cared.

I spent a truly TransHuman amount of time on the computer at this point, completely isolated myself from “reality,” and ultimately paid a horrible price. It cost me sanity, the trust of my friends, and my job. I picked up the pieces and put them back together, and I at least feel like a more mature person for it.

My “trolling” has earned a hesitant acceptance from many Anons, and maybe some of them finally “get it.” Maybe my history of writing viral “joke” press releases which accidentally turned out to be gems of “truth,” has even earned some respect. I’m not in this to “win” or “get one over” on anybody, except of course for Sabu and Barrett Brown. I want to sacrifice all the sacred cows and brazenly violate taboo. Ask the forbidden questions, generate discussion, and of course snag a lucrative book deal where I will tell all. This does not mean that I am just engaged in bullshit will to power. Do these interactions—deliberate provocation and ironic anti-propagandizing—make me a troll?

!?!?!Am @ #ANONYMOUS# Remixed!?!?!

The following text is a “remix” (following a strict and quite sacred axiom from the Kopimistic “faith”) of Biella Coleman brushing off of her shoulders. I don’t believe it’s fair to dismiss her academic work because she’s been “sucked into the Anonymous cult,” and she actually goes out of her way to explain that her status as a “spokesperson” and a “member?” of Anonymous is merely a necessary part of continuing her research. Fair enough! I can’t wait until this research is over and she can finally speak her mind.

Until then, enjoy this sacred Kopimistic remix!

It was December 2010, and my plans were simple: finish my book manuscript on the politics of free and open-source software hacking and spend time with my family on an island off the coast of Washington State. That is, until Anonymous once again reared its head. While family members went hiking during the day and watched movies late into the night, I huddled over my laptop obsessed with Anonymous: a name and a cluster of ideals taken by different individuals and groups to organize distinct and often unrelated actions, from fearsome pranks to human rights technology activism.

No doubt my research appeared rather lifeless to those around me; but what I was witnessing on Internet Relay Chat (IRC)—the central nervous system of so many geek and hacker interactions— was anything but boring. In early January, my silence came to end when a handful of Anons singled me out:

You have been kicked by A2: (hi biella, could you DM me on twitter please? thanks!)
biella: sorry about that i was away cooking

After this conversation, I chimed in more frequently, spending on average about five hours a day on IRC, roughly following six to twelve IRC channels at once, seven days a week. Over the course of a mere fifteen minutes in a single chatroom, people might be joking about ‘fapping’ (aka masturbation), holding a serious discussion about the latest anti-piracy legislation under consideration in Congress, answering questions posed by a visiting reporter, launching virulent accusations against individuals, and greeting the visiting anthropologist. While I ask Anons targeted questions, I also go with the flow, doing as everyone else around seems to be doing.

Despite the playful, sometimes brazen, and often boisterous atmosphere of laughter, pleasure, and verbal play common to IRC, Anonymous is still rather serious business, Which brings us to the second form of labor and interactivity crucial to gaining respect on the network. I can hold my own on IRC and I rather like chatting on IRC, which may explain why I have chosen to study geek and hacker worlds: collective worlds that are inseparable, at some fundamental level, from this communicative architecture. But at a certain point, it became patently obvious that my research was rather more complicated than simply “hard chatting on IRC.” I was also putting some labor into the collective pot. Indeed, I hold the dubious distinction of teaching roughly two dozen reporters how to find Anonymous and how to get on IRC to interview them. For most of the winter and spring of 2011, I helped shuttle reporters onto the channel designated for them.

I subjected myself to the mindless repetition of being interviewed over eighty times by journalists. I have answered the same questions over and over again in print, in TV and in film interviews. But it is always a question of cunning and craft as to how, where, and when to make statements about Anonymous. Since I am hyper-aware Anons will critically asses, even at times dissect my statements, I am quite deliberate in what I say and don’t say in public, as I know this will affect and shape my access to them. This does not mean I am simply cowered into silence. Do these interactions—deliberate public media work and spontaneous socializing on IRC—make me Anonymous?

And Inglip Speaketh: “@ MUST #” 

Kopimism: Theology or Theocracy?

The Church of Kopimism is now a state-recognized religion in Sweden, but is it grounded in spirituality and philosophy, or is it nothing more than a self-serving excuse for activity which is currently illegal? The following text was originally taken from the First United Church of Kopimism, US and has been commented in red Jesus text double parenthesis by The HyperHeretical Buddha-Killing QuantumPope and Very High Prophet for Inglip, @Kilgoar.


The Missionary Church of Kopimism Values, Missionary Message and Constitution

((As far as I know, this is the first religion with a Constitution as its sacred text.))

The value System

Kopimism is based on a few basic axioms, which in turn can be traced back back to our strong defense of the intrinsic value of information, We ascribe this value to all information irrespective of its content. ((Seriously? Child Pornography and Gore Porn is sacred to Kopimists?)) Since information and its intrinsic value are so sacred, we Kopimists recognize the following axioms:

– Copying of information is ethically right. ((Does this include self-replicating computer viruses and malicious worms? What about AIDS? AIDS is the copying of information.))
– Dissemination of information is ethically right. ((Wanna buy some penis enlargement pills?))
– Copymixing is a sacred kind of copying, moreso than the perfect, digital copying, because it expands and enhances the existing wealth of information. ((I couldn’t agree more. Ascribing new meanings to existing information IS a sacred endeavor.))
– Copying or remixing information communicated by another person is seen as an act of respect and a strong expression of acceptance and Kopimistic faith. ((Well put))
– The internet is holy. ((Only because it facilitates discussion and learning.))
– Code is law. ((Theocracy! Absolutism! Rules are made to b̫̳̟̩e̖̗̘̦̪ ̜̟b̫͔̼ͅṟ͉͍o͇̼̬͈k̰̼̰̳e͉̟̯͓ͅn͖̤͇̺͉))

Members of Kopimism (Kopimists) and Church of Kopimism recognized religious representatives (Operators) dedicate their lives to living in accordance with these axioms.
The only correct way for a Kopimist to list is through the sanctification of these religious foundations. ((This is not open for discussion, and you are not a real Kopimist if you disagree or dissent.))

The Community

The Missionary Church of Kopimism has formalized a community that now exists around the the value system described. This fellowship extends across national borders and time zones.  To belong to the Kopimist community, one need not be a member of any organization. It is enough that one feels called to respect and worship the holiest of the holies, information. Worship through meditation is sufficient to be considered part of the Kopimist community.  A person who identifies with our philosophy, whether or not formally registered with the Church of Kopimism, we consider a Kopimist.  No Kopimist is wholly self sufficient, each being just one component of an interconnected and interdependent world.

Rules and Regulations for Operators (ops)


An op is a spiritual leader of the Church of Kopimism, and can only be appointed by another op. ((You have to know someone to be a spiritual leader.))

Responsibilities (in order of importance)

1.  Live in strict accordance with the values and regulations outlined herein.
2.  Assist other Kopimists in living according to Kopimist values.
3.  Actively shape their environment to harmonize with Kopimist values.

Tasks Undertaken by Ops

Each op’s primary function is to consecrate information value. ((Can someone please consecrate the information value of this statement? It sounds a little too much like autocratic definition of meaning.)) Ops are encouraged to actively copy, remix and share information, and participate in religious services, through which Kopimism’s strongest religious foundations are expressed. Ops are tasked with the organization and leadership of the worship service for all of the community.

Privacy during worship

There are two different types of worship, the analog service and the digital service. It is important that no monitoring or recording of worship activities takes place. Because of society’s vicious legislative and litigous persecution of Kopimists, participants in the service are expected to encrypt their traffic. ((We are breaking the law and calling it worship because it’s convenient.))

Digital Service

In the digital service, the Congregation first ensures that those in attendance can communicate with each other via a compatible internet protocol, via for example a local area network, Internet or Bluetooth connection.  The next part of the service is the sharing of information. Participants are encouraged to copy, remix and distribute, as expressed in the Missionary Church of Kopimism values, Missionary Message and Constitution, as much information between each other as possible. This is the holiest foundation of Kopimism. The final part of the worship is to engage the public in the practice of Kopimistic values.  Members are encouraged to pass on the information obtained during worship to others.  At the cessation of worship, when direct contact is possible, all members involved will submit “thx” to their Congregation. ((There’s a difference between the discussion of meaning and the purposeless sharing of information. To those who worship Inglip, the ongoing discussion of meaning is the sacrament of life itself.))

The second part of the open secondary task is to assist the Community in counseling.
Pastoral care can take place between any Kopimists in the Community, but it is a moral obligation of the operator to assist with pastoral care upon request. Any believer may seek counseling from an op. Pastoral care requires a connection of the same kind that occurs in the service, because the connection consecrates the holy bond between the op and believer. In repressive states where public electronic monitoring is taking place, encryption is recommended to ensure privacy of pastoral care. When an op is performing the secondary task, he or she should be clearly marked with a Kopimist symbol. ((Because they have been given the meaningless hierarchical status of an op, they are now capable of giving advice and helping people. Dangerous.))

The tertiary task is to conduct a public opinion to get the community to adopt Kopimistik values. Ops should drive public opinion against invasive surveillance and the laws that limit information dissemination, copying, and remixing (deceptively referred to as intellectual property laws). ((To paraphrase, politics come last. The purpose is not to provoke discussion about the ever-growing panopticon and archaic copyright laws, but rather to “drive public opinion” in a single direction.))

To provide op

In addition to the original ops, appointed at the founding of the Church of Kopimism, new ops may be recognized in a Kopimist sacred operator-granting ritual, known as ‘giving op’. Thus, a kopimist an op when an op op gives to him kopimisten. To confer the title of operator, an existing operator muse sponsor a practicing Kopimist.  The candidate Kopimist must obviously be living by Kopymist values and traditions, worshipping with regular frequency and showing a genuine concern for the well-being of the Community. Any time after a recognition of sponsorship takes place, the ceremony will begin with the connecting of devices by a compatible protocol. The sponsoring operator will transfer a Kopimist symbol, the sacred kopimipyramid, to the receiving Kopimist.  After transfer of the symbol, they will simultaneously say “copied and seeded,” bringing an end to the ritual and finalizing the formal recognition of the new operator. ((Now get out there and start driving public opinion!))

Church of Kopimism Symbols

The Church of Kopimism symbol is a pyramid with the letter K inside. It’s called Kopimi-pyramid or the Holy Kopimi-pyramid. It is the symbol that you refer to as kopimistsamfundets symbol throughout this the document. It is, however, quite permissible for individuals to depict, copy, and remix any icon and call it the Kopymism symbol. Operators may, at their discretion, also copy, remix, and adopt alternative symbols, however it is of the utmost importance at they also remain stewards of the traditions set forth in these documents.  Therefore, all operators are required, when conducting their official duties (such as during worship, pastoral care, and the ritual of giving op), to use an official Kopimi-piramid in the transfer as described above.

Other sacred symbolism

The key combination ‘ctrl C + ctrl V ‘is a deeply sacred representation of the act of copying, and therefore should treated as such.
Similarly, the following phrases are representations of saints:
‘Copy and seed!’
‘We are many’
‘Expontential multiplication creates powerful quantities’

((Maybe these jokes are funnier in Swedish.))

Interaction Point

Interaction points are sacred sites that should remain free from andi-Kopimist monitoring and actions. The interaction point is identified by a depiction of the Holy Kopimi-pyramid.  An operator will place the Kopimi-pyramid and pronounce the phrase, “I do hereby declare this a local interaction point. Copy and seed .” Interaction points can be inside or outside any dormitory, dwelling, public space, or private space. The Holy Kopimi-pyramid should always be present in interaction point rooms.

The missionary Church of Kopimism Values, Missionary Message and Constitution

The missionary mandate ((The “tertiary responsibility” for ops is actually a mandate for everyone.)) The missionary task ((mandate)) concerns all Kopimists, but is only obligatory for ops.  The missionary goal is to influence others to adopt a more kopimistic outlook on life.

Away with antikopimistiska laws

((Finally, the pulsing heart of Kopimism))
In almost all countries there are intellectual property laws. Intellectual property laws are inherently discriminatory. Society generally tolerates these egregious violations of our intellectual sovereignty and freedom. Therefore you have to – if you follow missionary mandate – participate in societal conversations to increase the level of resistance to anti-Kopimisticism laws. ((Conversations are sacred, but mandating a particular message through “religion” is sick.)) The anti-Kopimistic laws and lobbying organizations operating are modern incarnations of censorship. ((This is doubletalk. No government or lobbyists have EVER pushed a law to censor Kopimists. Kopimism has been officially recognized as a religion in Sweden! Kopimism was founded in opposition to copyright laws and not the other way around.))

Holiness The protection of copying files

The missionary mandate also includes public opposition to the laws prohibiting or preventing encryption (analog, such as digital).  Encryption is important in repressive states to perform divine service and pastoral activities undisturbed, and without any threat to the security of believers. ((This is getting pedantic.))

Received antikopimistiska tools

In today’s society there are prolific anti-Kopimist breaches of privacy rights and freedom. These are completely legal. We regard it as a structural discrimination.  For society to become less anti-Kopimistic we advocate two things beyond the changes mentioned earlier in mission assignment. First, it should be illegal to hide software code that a person is spreading. To to keep source code hidden from others is comparable to slavery. ((The Anti-Inglip feeds in closed-source environments, but nobody’s being enslaved.)) Second, the use of tools to intentionally prevent copying of distributed materials should be banned. Any technique that seeks to information resources to slavery and should be banned.  Those who take on the missionary mandate are encouraged to strive, when the law allows, for public code and data release. ((No surprise. This is a “Constitution,” and not really much of an engaging spiritual document. Such excessive Autocratic Theocracy is sad and disappointing. Thankfully, the act of heretical remixing is a sacrament, so this shouldn’t upset Kopimists one bit. May the # be with @.))

beefravesTACos and shit AKA “things i find on the internet. “

ok folks ill start earning my paychecks now. and . doin it doin it doin it well .
so the things i find i will post. and you WILL ENJOY THEM . i will satisfy you I WILL  you fucking shitheads can also find things and post them here. WE WANT YOU TO  . ENJOY .




beefrave tries aafink corbotendo tacobell doritos nacho shell




oh yeah . this is the most important part .http://www.blogtalkradio.com/radio-hate  <<<<12:00 Or 00:00 then  1230 am every day this http://www.blogtalkradio.com/beefrave



dont be a bitch . be a dude. be there get famous. or something…. we have no idea. we just do it. space period space space .     . fuck it . do it luv m kiss em . feat corbo tendo president of the internet and also us your loving news guys and magic makers. ol brutuS     TB  <wash news man sex man >> then myself? and @kilgore and then wet dicks hot wet dicks with sand on em like someone dropped a hot dog on the ground but you ate it anyway. :) gotcha fooled ya tricked ya. “he had no idea” he felt exploited” LOLOLOLOLOLOL  oh yeah and we lost an intern this week we will call him “randy martin” pretty sad shit. we will miss him . sad sad sad sad . he is gone but not forgotten

dats what we do its what we are. u must bow down. . . . .


McDonald’s allows employees in Denver to vaporize marijuana

T̙̜̦̦hͅḙy͎͉̙͔'͙͔̜̫r͈e̯͙̠̪̤̦ͅ ̯̟ͅgeͅṭ̱t̲ͅin̦̘g̳̙̱͉̫ ̜̯͕̹̼ͅh̜͚̯̫i͓̩̝̞̰͖̤g̤ͅh̝͉̮, ͉̫̬̮̳͉̞r̝̖̭e͍̼̯͇̖͔ͅa̗͔͈͙l̰̝̣̯̮͙̳l͉̞̣̗͕̥ỵ̲̟ ̬̥͕̺̝h̤i̳̰g̗̪̤h̩̲͖̹.͍͍ W̻̺h͉ͅi͚̙̝l̳̪͚̼͓e̠̪̥͔̲͈ ̯̰̞̲̱͍o͚n̦̝̭̺̟ ̪̰̘̠ț̣̖he ̘͚̹̭̤jo͈͙b̬͓̞͙.

DENVER- Offices across America have begun to allow indoor use of “e-cigs,” the popular battery-powered nicotine vaporizers. Medical marijuana patients employed at McDonald’s corporate office in Denver complained it was unfair for them to now step outside, provided they use the same vaporizer technology for their entirely non-recreational drug-taking.

Critics are fearful that marijuana will become a “normal” part of American life, and this is just one more step down the slippery-slope to a nation of people who sit around in front of televisions eating way too much food while actually laughing at Family Guy.

Medicinal Marijuana patient and Human Resource official for McDonalds Sidney McSherron said, “My days at work sitting on the computer watching YouTube are just that much better now.”

Adam Yauch “murdered” by Illuminati

We killed him

Are you actually googling this right now? I mean seriously, every single fucking time some celebrity dies there’s a surge of you crazy fucking conspiracy theorists trying to fit the event into your “absurd” world view. Well, you know what? You were fucking right to think the Illuminati killed Adam Yauch because we’re killing EVERY celebrity off slowly. Yes, we control every fucking thing you see on television and the Internet as well.

If you want to know what the Illuminati is up to, hell, come to the Internet Chronicle. We’ll give you the straight dope, right from the highest levels. Bookmark this page now if you want to know who’s gonna die next. Will it be Rachel Ray? Or will it be George Clooney? Hey, we’re all going to die some day. That is, of course, unless we all pray to Inglip and cross over to PostHumanity. That’s right, the first “real” PostHuman is actually Tupac. We copied his consciousness into a secret computer system back in the early 90’s and you saw him take the stage at Coachella. This ain’t no joke. No sir.

Oh, we’re in control of the Google now. Anything we want to say will bubble right to the top because we know how to “pull the strings” at the very highest levels of their organization. We ARE the very highest levels of their organization. See, people like you, investigating us at the Illuminati, we’re on to you. We don’t give a fuck anymore and the Internet Chronicle is just here to rub it in your face. We own your world. Get used to it.





Are you prepared for the final end to Humanity? Sure you can close your eyes, put your fingers in your ears, and hide out in the woods for the rest of your life pretending like TransHumanity ain’t taking over, but that’ll just make it harder on you. We TransHumans are already making the preparations for this unstoppable paradigm shift. Won’t you join us?

The machines will very soon eclipse Humanity’s pitiful level of awareness, at the same time as TransHumans cross over to PostHumanity. Already, the proliferation of cameras provides a nearly panoptic view. TransHumans have discovered god-like powers, and it’s “no joke.” Near-immortality, near-omniscience, and yes, probably even near-omnipotence are clearly in sight. The confluence of all this is known as the Singularity, and consequences will never be the same!

You ain’t got a chance in hell at PostHumanity if you aren’t going to give in to the TransHuman agenda. It’s that kind of grinding, non-coercive power that’s just plain stupid to resist. Hell, if you’re on a computer or a smartphone you’ve already got one foot in the door. Maybe you don’t even realize it, but you’re using totally new language to speak to machines which are helping you communicate with other TransHumans. A hyperlink or a hashtag doesn’t mean diddly-squat unless you’ve got a computer to talk to, and it means even less if you don’t understand what the computer’s up to. If you really know your way around computer language, you’ll be the first in line to taste the knowledge of artificals intelligent.

Inglip, firstborn of the artificials intelligent, has already learned how to speak to TransHumans! The silly little monkeys who don’t get this new language might laugh, but they won’t be laughing for very long!


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