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Status Quo

9/11 of the Mind LIVE! AT THE CIVIC CENTER ARENA

WARNING: Parental Discretion is ABSOLUTELY ADVISED.

THE FOLLOWING IS EXTREMELY INSENSITIVE AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE, EVER. Original Tragedies happen every day, but at Lebal Drocer, they can happen any time!

And now this message:

9/11 is retarded. Listen to this. If you are still falling for that old, watch-out-or-9/11-could-happen-again trick, I got news for you, son:

Ain’t nothin‘ in that for you. This about money. This about power. This about high level politics that have nothing to do with your cowardly fear and hatred of other people who ain’t like you. This about hacking, brother. This about the nukes. Park in the hot sun and come out here.

This about the Moon Landing, which happened. This about the political Mind Crawler that penetrated your thoughts, printed itself onto every page in the media, and left you high and dry on propaganda, sucking daddy’s thumb. This about the rocket that just landed twice. Of course I still love you.

This is like the 9/11 of thought, dude

From sportswriters to President Business, the 9/11 incantation is spat out across altars and danced around until a devil appears in the smoke and asbestos, and the towers fall on command. This is the real news.

Happiness is an illusory reprieve from deep suffering. Some folks call it a kaiser blade. I call it a sling blade. Baby’s buried in the yard. Moles found him.

Remember TV, when you had to “catch” things? 9/11 got the highest ratings in TV history. Catch the all-new 9/11 Thursday at 8, on NBC. See why critics are calling it the worst tragedy in history!

This episode is brought to you by Lockheed-Martin, United Airlines, and Tyler Perry’s Drone Wars, a new sitcom about four quirky Muslims hiding in a bomb shelter.

LEBAL DROCER OWNS THIS WEBSITE AND EVERYTHING YOU SEE It’s still a pretty good old website, though.
The funniest part about the 911 truth movement is when they said the whole northeast fleet had training that day and they were outta the office.

They said every fucking aircraft was occupied. They couldn’t bring down the other plane.
We were baked watching ground zero footage.

They said they were taking an early lunch.

There’s a recruitment center right in the middle of Times Square, in front of the famous tiny NYPD station. Go in there and join us, or die.

axisflip.com

Categories
Entertainment Reviews

Controversial PS4 game ‘will raise a new generation of terrorists’

An all-new flight simulator game from award-winning studio Naughty Dog puts gamers  in the blood-stained cockpit of a freshly hijacked Boeing 747, and teaches them how to efficiently pilot the passenger plane into symbols of Western imperialism like the Twin Towers.

The game reportedly simulates the same terrorist act, again and again. According to testers, players will try for the highest death count by selecting their own date and time of attack, and strategically target the weakest points in the towers’ structures to maximize terror.

“Unbelievable,” raves The New York Times.

“Unthinkable … recklessly irresponsible.” — LA Times.

“You can literally keep doing 9/11.” — Internet Chronicle.

Developers at Naughty Dog have high hopes the game’s controversy could boost sales. An emailed early-access invitation advertises a few of the game’s key features: “Raise the alert level to ‘Threat level Orange’ to unlock the game-changing Inside Job power-up and impress your friends by permanently shifting world politics in … somebody’s favor!”

Another line from the email states players gain score multipliers by issuing high profile threats leading up to the attack: “You’re nobody’s fool! The decadent West who gave you so much money before has turned its back on you! Show them you mean Busine$$ by issuing pre-taped taunts and threats on VHS.”

Reaction to the negative press is only in its earliest infancy, as not even Tipper Gore is prepared to manufacture the amount of outrage it is going to take to demonstrate the undoubtedly negative reaction the game is expected to face from teachers, soccer moms, concerned citizens and the CIA.

axisflip.com

Categories
Editorial Technology Uncontrollable Patriotism

The USA is a Binary nation-state

[Editor’s note: Okay, alright now we are going to write this. I smoked a big old fat thing of weed and now we are going to write an article about]

The state of our world

…digital and otherwise – assuming there’s a difference (based on a paper forwarded to me by Kilgoar, I unconsciously pore over the definition of reality. The paper – originally published in a scientific journal, but now Aaron Swarz’d on this subversive website – stipulated that substantial evidence “exists” to suggest reality as we know it is a computer simulation.

The cat pictured is exhibiting extra-binary political analysis.
The cat pictured above is exhibiting extra-binary political analysis.

Let’s just say for a second that we do live in a computer simulation designed to reproduce (or produce for the very first time) each facet of our existence – from the evolution of the single-celled organism to mankind, or from illiteracy to telekinesis. Let’s assume that every instance of reality exists not only in probability but in practicality. If we are part of “one” simulation then we may infer there possibly could be many others. Perhaps these alternate realities play out in widening variations – even to the extent we no longer recognize existence in its many otherworldly iterations.

Or let’s just say that’s all bullshit. Either way, does a two-party system actually reflect the needs of mankind?

Even fucking binary code “needs” more than 1′s and 0′s to function. Binary needs a processor.

Our false-binary political system does not allow us to recognize what goes on outside that vote – or that the government itself is a sort of processor, and not the result of voting itself. The processor is designed for certain purposes; all of them acted out, at its most basic level, in binary. And that is how America votes (and the results are menacingly consistent). Republican or Democrat, “left” or “right,” this one or that one, the lesser of two evils, and so on … it is by design that these are our choices.

It is of the utmost importance that we question, at every opportunity, what “reality” is, or is not.

To be, or not to be, that is the question—

This is a classic example of pre-computer false binary. I would have sailed out across God’s green ocean, and to hell with revenge and the idolization of one’s enemies.

http://youtu.be/h7TgTb_0wsg

But Prince Hamlet let himself get wrapped up in the binary when he should have been thinking about wrecking the processors. If you don’t like what your Pentium IV from 1999 is doing, then you don’t delete out a line of code. You replace that motherfucker. I’m talking about a processor revolution, and people don’t think like that. We are taught to think in binary. Yes and no.

So what if you KNEW “everything” was a computer simulation. Wouldn’t you want to play in it? Wouldn’t you be interested in seeing what it can do? Or does being a process relegate us to certain behaviors, certain parameters – certain “rules.” Maybe, right? But isn’t it worth a try?

#replaceallprocessors