Barrett Brown, who famously transformed into a spider and attacked Anonymous Anthropologist Biella Coleman while in the midst of a torturous Diesel Therapy, is set to be released from Federal Prison on Tuesday. Here’s a small list of the important facts he should know before tweeting plans for a legitimized, legal revolution.
The largest . . .
TRUMP TOWER — Donald Trump announced he has assembled a press pool, in a move that shocked reporters. Traditional print and television journalists will not be given any access to Trump. Rather, he’s assigned several teams of reality television filmmakers to document his presidency.
Trump said, “I want to communicate with the . . .
Tonight only, come get your hole sucked at Southside Hole-Suckers on Williamson Rd right next door to the Civic Center Arena!
Hole-Suckers on Southside is now fun for the whole family. Get your hole sucked on Southside while the women watch. Hole Suckers on Southside is where Timmy becomes a man! Southside Hole . . .
ROANOKE, Va. — FBI agents claim two stoned American white men were “ripped like babies from a womb” following Tuesday’s election results.
Investigators who have been working on the case since Wednesday said the men appeared paranoid and terrified, as if they had seen some horrible aspect.
“It was like they were just . . .
Donald Trump pardons American Heroes
THE SWAMP — Sunday evening at a Republican fundraising dinner in Washington DC, Donald Trump promised to pardon Edward Snowden, Julian Assange, and Chelsea Manning.
Speaking to the group of neoconservative elites, Trump said, “These are people who have done good things, heroic things for America. Heroes. Meanwhile the . . .
Faceless marauders crushed a Native Rebellion on Friday that threatened to impede construction of a sweet new oil pipeline across the Northern US.
Citing unfounded claims that oil pipelines leak into water supplies, opposition forces escalated their protest into a mounted assault that led to the injury of at least a few of . . .
Poison Ivy humiliates thousands of men in her spare time
INTERNET — A 17 year old e-dominatrix known as ‘Poison Ivy’ has been faced with a discriminating and misogynistic campaign to shame her for humiliating hundreds of young men.
This story began when a youtube video, since removed due to a violation of a . . .
Guest writer Christopher Nemelka explains the true inner workings of his teachings
As we play the game of mortal life our Advanced Selves often become immersed in what is ultimately a Lone and Dreary World. I’ve withheld some of the most incredibly revealing secrets until this point in time. But now that it is . . .
Assange’s internet has been cut off, and upon receiving his daily printout of Internet Chronicle, he has suffered a severe psychotic break.
INTERNET — Julian Assange, now caged like a rat in the unfriendly Ecuadorean embassy, trashed his tiny apartment early Monday morning shortly after receiving a stack of printouts of every Internet Chronicle . . .
Julian Assange is back online. Photo: Wikileaks
LONDON–Julian Assange’s oldest love of “crushing bastards” could soon include “crushing bitches” too, after new documents released by Wikileaks show collusion between Hillary Clinton, Clinton Foundation administrators, and Democratic National Committee treasurers.
Everyone but Lee Iacocca has their money on Clinton, given that even weapons manufacturers stand . . .