Charrie Wongz (@TehWongz) was recently kicked out of Destructivesec following his alleged arrest and cooperation with law enforcement agencies. In a recently leaked conference call, agents used derisive terms to refer to Wongz.
Wongz is fifteen years old and has been hacking since he was twelve. He has hacked the online video game service Steam, as well as going on the offensive against his own school. By planting a malicious batch file into the school’s system, he crashed every computer with one swift stroke.
Wongz denies allegations that he is in any way working with law enforcement or that he was ever affiliated with Anonymous. However, he does admit he did have his computer equipment confiscated and had a voluntary interview with police. He is currently campaigning to raise money for a new laptop.
Sadly, Wongz informed us that he has retired from hacking at the request of his girlfriend.
Everything the Jester was once known for has been taken away. He has been castrated by Apache developers, posted an embarrassing music video which encompasses his feelings toward small children, and is now shitting himself in fear of Lebal Drocer, Incorporated.
Recently, I met th3j35t3r in Barrett Brown’s empty tinychat room, where he bragged about taking the Chronicle down for a few days. Which is true, he did: by running a simple script against BlueHost, who we paid to host the Chronicle, he caused one of their servers to seize up and a whole bunch of their clientele’s websites went down with chronicle.su. And when I met him, he had just “quit hacking” – supposedly on a whim, so before I left him in there, I was sure to point out the true reason the attacks stopped:
The script Jester used to attack us – and many others – is now obsolete since Apache developers updated their software. No big deal, just a little update and web hosts everywhere are fine again. We updated and now we are fine. But the Jester’s afraid BlueHost and Lebal Drocer are pissed off about it. And he’s probably right. Sure, maybe we provoked him, but this is what happens when you attack the 1%. They do not forgive. They do not forget. So just because he took us down in August doesn’t mean our old host doesn’t want their fucking money now.
Take one quick moment to absorb our small victory, for we have beaten the Jester at his own silly game. You see, the Jester is a terrorist. His goal is to create terror. For example, he wants to chill our speech – by attacking our site, he hoped to make us afraid to write. Obviously, that didn’t happen. But now he’s afraid that our team of lawyers are coming after him in the name of Lebal Drocer, Inc. [Editor’s note: Fact is, he attacked us on shared hosting, on one of the largest webhosts in the world. Did “the jester” really think Bluehost would tolerate him downing thousands of clients’ sites at once?]
What a cowardly bitch. He took everything down, including his picture of the cease-and-desist order they sent him. That means Bluehost actually knows the identity of “the jester.” But we don’t, and neither do you. Still, we can characterize him for you anyway, using all the information we do have.
Who is th3j35t3r?
The Jester, a known pedophile, is an otherwise sexless man – a “script kiddie” that somehow figured out he could bloat up outdated Apache servers to uselessness. This is achieved by holding a large number of connections open with the server at one time. He is a longtime fan of the Insane Clown Posse, who eroded his creativity before it ever had a chance to bloom. Having no web design skills, his only alternative was to destroy. So he went to “work.” But who to attack?
Over time, the fatass Jesterfag became so well known for torturing Urdu (language) Islamic website owners, he became widely recognized as the world’s most likely hacker to vote a third time for Bush and Cheney.
Later on, as he gained Twitter followers, he took on feelings of Unwarranted Self-Importance and pretended to harbor political convictions after the mainstream media assassinated Wikileaks for being better at journalism than them.
He soon claimed attacks on Wikileaks, as well as the Westboro Baptist Church of Trolling Art.
But he fucked up when I provoked him to attack us. If you’ve been reading up till this point, you know how: he took my bait, ultimately unleashing a ravenous team of coked up Lebal Drocer lawyers who seek to hunt him down like a runaway slave – they are on so much cocaine they’re representing the web hosts of jihadists.
The Jester thought he could bitch and complain to our host that we were running profanity and “slandering” his fake name. [ Editor’s note: libel is written. Slander is spoken. ] But he doesn’t know about the law and how there are no laws which protect false identities from libel.
If the Jester read more, he might have learned the laws before making an ass out of himself. But books are for faggots. Still, he is willing to pull Steinbeck quotes from wikiquote. #pseudointellectual#pedophile
Steinbeck wrote about the Great Depression – a time when men were men, and you didn’t fuck with other people’s accounts unless they were fucking with your moonshine operation. But if you did, you learned the hard way not to. The Jester, too, will learn.
In th3j35t3r’s constant struggle against Jihadists, he has grown increasingly similar to his most hated enemies. By committing several terror attacks on 9/11, he has become more like Al-Qaeda than ever before. But is it going too far to call th3j35t3r’s attacks terrorism? As a recent victim of an attack by th3j35t3r, Chronicle.SU is of the opinion that th3j35t3r is indeed a terrorist. He was quick to publish our personal details in the hopes that it would scare us into submission. By this action alone, th3j35t3r definitely fits the most basic definition for terrorist.
Recently identified as a possible astroturf campaign, th3j35t3r has fought hard against allegations that he uses a botnet. While several stories have been planted in the press promoting his denial of botnet ownership, such claims rely completely on th3je5t3r’s word – the word of a law-breaking anonymous vigilante. Curiously, he refuses to release the software which enables such remarkable attacks without the use of botnets. This kind of secretive vigilantism most definitely raises many important questions, even as th3j35t3r’s 9/11 hacks mark his steady descent into a world of pure terrorism. Such secrecy does not exactly scream “activist.”
While th3j35t3r may temporarily disrupt the communications of small Jihadist forums, he acts without the approval of the military. He can only be getting in the way of serious attempts at infiltration and espionage by real experts with real defense contracts. By making provocative military action completely outside the jurisdiction of America’s military, th3j35t3r is most definitely committing acts of terrorism. It is little wonder that so few military men support th3j35t3r. They know there is no place for vigilantism on the battlefield. Yet th3j35t3r, like many terrorists, works alone.
Th3j353t3r often targets web sites on shared hosting, such as Chronicle.SU, meaning his attacks cause collateral damage to innocent civilians. He razes entire virtual cities to silence a few extremists. This all amounts to another striking similarity between th3j35t3r and Jihadists. Th3j35t3r does not take any effort to minimize collateral damage.
Like the Jihadists, it is clear th3j35t3r’s favorite day for vigilante military action is 9/11. The line that separates him from the terrorists he attacks has grown increasingly thin, and to be honest, it’s surprising he has not been condemned by a military that is surely conducting serious business in the cybertheater. The final comparison between th3j35t3r and Jihadists is possibly the most profound. Where any sensible military acts only to achieve specific goals, terrorists like th3j35t3r and bin Laden only act to bring publicity to their cause. Th3j35t3r seeks to escalate military conflict just for fame. Real experts fight thanklessly and have no use for a jester prancing around the battlefield, begging for bitcoins.
