Police Collecting License Plate Data in Parking Lots; Photo Confirms

KENOSHA, Wisconsin — It has come to my attention from a dear twitter follower and fellow presidential hatemail author, @HerObama, that local police are not only utilizing visible light communications to transmit rays that not only sedate it’s victims, but collects data on their license plates. I had my skepticism, obviously, being a level-headed veteran journalist . . .

Syrian Electronic Army Intel Leaked by Snowden

Syrian Electronic Army Logo

MOSCOW, Russia – In an unexpected turn of events on Wednesday, NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden outed a supposedly rag-tag group of Syrian rebel hackers as a sophisticated persona management project. Little has been known about the Syrian Electronic Army (SEA) since inception, but most believe them to be residing . . .

Pacific Ocean Heating Rapidly after new Fukushima Leak

Scientists are scrambling to come up with a way to neutralize Fukushima Radiation.

FUKUSHIMA — A new study by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration shows that temperatures in the Pacific are heating up at an enormous rate, due to another massive leak of radiation at Fukushima. Worldwide, citizens are reporting excessive humidity . . .

Snowden Unveils Martin Luther King assassinated by CIA

Snowden told reporters he had proof Martin Luther King was assassinated in a secret CIA plot.

MOSCOW — Edward Snowden, NSA leaker, shared secret CIA documents with Internet Chronicle reporters which incontrovertibly prove that Martin Luther King was murdered because, as the internal memo says, “Initial analysis showed blacks just wanted to use . . .

Why the hell do you want to destroy the government?

We all knew it already. The government’s the devil.

INTERNET —  Every single fucking day, Twitter revolutionaries speak of dismantling the government. Why? Because our friends at the NSA have terrible surveillance powers no one should ever have access to, and the military conveniently polices genocidal dictators. Terrible, chilling stuff. But if you . . .

Syrian Liberation Looming, Commerce Dept.: Streaming Al Jazeera English a ‘Felony’

Domestic Extremists: Al Jazeera America’s Coverage is Covering up the Truth about Syria

WASHINGTON – As a full-scale NATO offensive against Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad looms, the Obama administration’s Commerce Department is ensuring that Americans have full access to accurate information about the upcoming struggle. Commerce Secretary Penny Pritzker said Tuesday that any . . .

5 million dead after Obama orders Nuclear Strike on Syria

A large area of Damascus was transformed into a “Sea of Glass” after Obama ordered retaliation for chemical attacks on Syrian civilians.

DAMASCUS — Much of Syria has been transformed into a “Sea of Glass” after sources reported an enormous nuclear blast Wednesday. President Obama addressed the American people from the Oval Office, . . .

Al-Assad ‘Not So Stupid’ As To Use Chemical Weapons: Kurdish Leader

Obama Commands Missile Strike Anyway

DAMASCUS, Syria – Syrian President Bashar al-Assad – in Iran right now, presumably waiting for his country to collapse – would not have been “so stupid” as to deploy chemical weapons near Damascus, said Saleh Muslim, head of the Kurdish Democratic Union Party (PYD).

Secretary of State . . .

Glenn Greenwild admits to affair with Edward Snowden

Greenwild allegedly cheated on partner David Miranda while working with Snowden in Hong Kong

HONG KONG — Witnesses tell the Internet Chronicle they saw Journalist Glenn Greenwild and Edward Snowden “drunk and making out” in public before police escorted the couple back to a hotel room. Recent reports show Greenwild’s boyfriend, David Miranda, . . .

The Internet’s Top 10 Top 10

Nothing brings inordinate amount of Internet Traffic to amateurish writing like uselessly posturing pieces of art in pointless lists which imply one piece of art is better than another. 

1. Top 10 Most Gruesome Torture Methods (Cracked)

Yet another banal walk through torture methods that everyone already knows about somehow seems more interesting when . . .