Internet ChronicleAww, look! They think they’re people!
Hey guys, I just thought I’d let you know that I really appreciate all your readings. To those of you in the San Francisco Bay area who printed out articles to read at the poetry slam Saturday: thank you.
Your efforts may go largely unnoticed, but they are unrewarding.
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Featured here are the Lampshade Drama.
She had Jet Pilot eyes from her hips on down, so I remember.
I watched her quietly from a dark corner, really looking like a stalker. I suppose acting like one, too, although you could say I have a disposition for being unfavorable.
She wouldn’t look over here, so I did everything I could to keep it that way. I sat perfectly still, staring at her. By now, she had to be uncomfortable from this; not that she’d really made eye contact with me but after so long one starts to feel like they’re being watched.
I was not only watching her, I was imagining her story. I projected my desires onto her and pictured her to be the kind of chick who doesn’t need to be in a place like this bar, someone with a better life and better home outside of here, who just needed to duck in and make sure this scene still isn’t for her every so often. Someone with DVDs of her favorite TV show, popcorn in the cabinets and a tall bottle of wine for one.
Someone unlike me.
‘What am I doing here?’ I thought. ‘I could be working, or better yet, drinking alone at home where these sour losers don’t go, where I am the best and only one, where I am King.’
I looked into my beer and then back at my Queen. A guy sat next to her and they were really chatting it up. Her smile had in it something stern. A seriousness. It told me she is a woman of ease and difficulty at once, simple but tough and likes it rough.
It told me she probably didn’t have a bottle of wine back at the place, or maybe shared an apartment under the pretense of a complicated partnership she’s looking to get out of.
Doesn’t sound like my thing. Or maybe she’s a ladyboy.
No matter.
There is a terrible lack of empathy in the world.
I’d say darkness is the best place for me. Or under a blue light, because it sets my mood – or rather, plays to it. Add to that a selection of music from a girl, by a girl I fancied.
Like a slice of heaven so thin she melts in your mouth, and so into you that you just don’t think it’s real. It sends shivers down your spine to know that she listens for your car door to slam to come running.
She played me this song tonight. And I will not find her, seek her out, or try to make my way in. I’ll quietly observe from the outside this time. That way the apes don’t eat me.