Internet Chronicle

North Korea grants asylum for Snowden

Post author By Kilgoar
Post date July 2, 2013
31 Comments on North Korea grants asylum for Snowden

Hackers around the world have been searching for a home for their wayward comrade, Edward Snowden. Finally, it seems, they have settled on North Korea.

SEOUL, Republic of Korea – In response to a formal application for asylum on behalf of Edward Snowden, Kim Jong-un issued a statement offering the whistleblower not just asylum, but full North Korean citizenship. Snowden and his entourage, staffed mostly by WikiLeaks employees, were ecstatic at the news of a safe haven after 14 other countries had denied their applications.

“The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea promises to allow Edward Snowden to continue to leak anything he wants. We will provide him with many of the best top-secret hacking tools available in North Korea,” said a representative from the North Korean military.

“We are just so relieved that Snowden has finally found friendly shores,” said Glen Greenwild, the reporter who famously interviewed Edward Snowden in a Hong Kong hotel.

Snowden issued a statement written in Spanish, thanking North Korea for their commitment to freedom.

Hate Video

THE RADIATION NANOBOTS PERMEATE THE SKULL (what are these brown patches?)

Post author By Hatesec
Post date June 27, 2013
6 Comments on THE RADIATION NANOBOTS PERMEATE THE SKULL (what are these brown patches?)

I HAVE NIGHTMARES WHERE A DARKNESS LEAKS OUT OF MY PHONE, INTO MY BRAIN, AND OBFUSCATES EVERY LAYER OF REALITY BEFORE IT.

THE LAYER WHERE I AM ASLEEP.

THE LAYER WHERE I AM A CLONE ON A CLONE FARM.

THE LAYER WHERE I AM THE MIND OF GOD.

THE CONTAINER LAYER OF GOD.

WINDOWS 95

I would completely annihilate my enemies in a retaliatory strike.

Tags CIA, HAARP, mind control, nsa, PRISM, vic livingston

Law News Obituaries Politics

Senator Wendy Davis dead at age 50

Post author By Jaime Cochran
Post date June 26, 2013
4 Comments on Senator Wendy Davis dead at age 50

Emotional moments before Senator Davis’ untimely demise.

WASHINGTON, DC — Fans mourn the loss of Texas senator Wendy Davis as the news reels trickled in this morning. After amassing support from not only Texas democrats throughout her years as a politician, she managed to garner a hefty klout score last night as her awe inspiring anti-abortion bill filibuster ran for 11 hours straight.

While the Texas senator was in good shape, dawning pink Nike crossfit training shoes to keep her buoyant on her final dance floor, she could not outrun the angry mob of rubes awaiting her outside the senate floor who tweeted furiously #StandWithWendy, collapsing Davis under the weight of her own eFame.

“She was a total fighter,” said Cecile Richards, president of Planned Parenthood Action Fund and champion kick-boxer. “She’ll be missed around the gym, that much is certain.”