Categories
Editorial Politics

VOTING DOES NOT MATTER

A vote for the president is a vote wastedI don’t understand why people still vote.

Who honestly believes the president will do what he says and as a result goes in to punch his ticket?

Based on their track record of failing to keep promises, you would think logic dictates that, “If a presidential candidate says he will pull our troops out of [insert ongoing foreign war here], but extends their tours of duty once in office, then shouldn’t I vote for the guy who says he wants war forever, because that is what I don’t want, and it’s what he is promising?”

Shit. I think I just figured out how I’m going to vote in 2012. That is, if I vote, which I won’t, because voting is for tools.

YOU HEARD IT AT ELF WAX: VOTING IS FOR TOOLS.

Because when you vote, you become a tool of the state, not of Democracy; and not a strong, useful tool but something more like a bullshit-absorbent sponge that when squeezed, produces a vote for whatever filth you retain. When they teach you that “the system works” by showing how when the majority votes on a candidate, or an issue, laws and policies change, it matches superficial cause-and-effect logic, but the side effects are neither seen nor tested. The system works, sure, but not for you, me, or the American people, or the people of the world. The system you legitimize through the practice of voting (or not) serves only the rich and privileged who ensure the elite maintain power.

This includes statesmen, conglomerations, corporate America, and people you’ll never know exist who orchestrate conflict-of-interest nightmare deals between government agencies and massive, reality-altering corporations. The end result is a sort of reverse-socialism where our decisions are made for us not by the government as Corporate News might have you fear, but by corporate interests themselves. The government is virtually powerless when one considers the proto-oligarchy of Wal-Mart, Google, Lockheed-Martin, the pharmaceutical industry and petroleum companies whose leadership is not comprised only of Americans but extends to all countries, including America’s enemies, in a trend called globalization. They vaguely touch upon this in high schools but due to an increase in difficult questions have shaved this discussion back dramatically.

So when people vote, and the faces change around – and new portraits are slapped up on the television screen, I know nobody’s surprised that the end result is the same, but they still complain like it’s that individual’s fault. The modern President is no more a leader today than Rush Limbaugh. That’s why he goes on shows like The View and talks to women. The illusion of power comes with his presence. But the truly powerful, any thinking man knows, live and die in the shadows. And tell Bush, Clinton, Bush, Obama, Sarah Palin, and General Patreus what to do.

So why do people vote? What I thought was funny in a tragic sort of way is how massive numbers of people came out to vote in the 2008 election. It was based on hope, or perhaps to ‘shake things up’ if they voted for Obama and old-fashioned common sense if you voted for McCain – that is, until Sarah Palin miracled his penis erect long enough to coerce the Vice President slot out of him with sex. And then everybody knew better. But now Americans are probably learning the sad truth about how neither Hope nor ideology can overcome the gauntlet of constituency and special interest groups a president is faced with during his first week in office.

“You can’t change that fucking policy! And you’ll owe me billions, if you do! Also, I guess you like having Michelle and the kids alive, right? I like ya, Barack. You shoot a straight line. So don’t fuck me here. Go out and flash that toothy grin of yours and get me paid before I put your balls on the shelf next to Kennedy’s skull fragment, motherfucker.”

So…ignorance, I have concluded, is why people vote. And yet, because they vote, they consider themselves to be informed, as if it takes knowledge or a certain degree of intellectual prowess to vote. Hardest part is overcoming the distrust of a voting machine, these days. These things can be programmed to get Proxima Centaurians elected. I think dogs make just as good voters, what with their gut instincts and all that. And people’s guts probably said, “Go with Obama. At least he’s smart and seems well-intentioned.” However, no amount of good intentions can erase the cold hard fact that we are at war with our own inflationary military industrial complex, to feed the need for War, and for oil to propagate the American Way – even though we’re still shooting at the brown people. We were on our way to war on the New Pipeline and people were screaming “bring the troops home.” It’s eerily quiet and suddenly Obama announced pulling combat troops out of Iraq and leaving an infrastructural force. But, the people were told to expect our troops to come home based on an empty promise, so falling in with the narrative, he provided that. Enjoy your Kandahar Province push, American citizens. Because it’s happening. We got troops preparing to pipe oil in from places you don’t dare imagine during your drive-time commute, and you call yourselves good Americans because you vote. What are you voting to receive? The sticker on your shirt? “I voted!” Checkmark. Get fucked.

Nowadays, we vote with our dollars. Stop spending money on pharmaceutical agents and you’ll see marijuana legalized. You’ll see LSD testing start back up to truly cure the depressed and mentally sick so you don’t have to watch your loved ones lurch around like doped up zombie shells to the beat of the pilltray. Vote against war by protesting en masse at the gas station. Let ’em collapse. Nothing’s too big to fail, except the human race and the war machine will ensure that happens, on a long-enough time frame. Information is on the horizon that will destroy the need for current needs and probably your way of life. Get ready, voters. 38 liars just a month away. Another chance to feel good about yourselves. Another chance to respect these people because they’re good at putting money together and flashing a smile on TV. Another chance to destroy the human race, one action – or inaction – at a time; it makes no difference.

Categories
Status Quo

When Families Grieve – A Very Special PBS Special

Why is my daddy dead? And who is this man?
Why is my daddy dead? And who is this man?

Anytown, USA–Elmo and his muppet friends are coming on PBS tonight at 8 pm, along with Katie Couric, who is best remembered for disguising her live colonoscopy on NBC’s Today Show as investigative journalism.

In tonight’s program, Elmo and Katie Couric (also a puppet) help very young people come to grips with death by accepting it as a never-ending facet of reality. The program is sponsored by Lockheed-Martin, the world’s largest manufacturer of war machines, and industry leaders of death.

Elmo and Katie will tell stupid people how to explain government-assisted death to children, as well as coping with sadness, fear and anger – but in such a way that does not necessarily challenge the status quo. For example, one should always fear terrorists, Elmo says, but not Father dying after being sent to fight them. As well, feelings of anger should never be allowed to crystallize into rage, because this is known to lead to convictions – and, later in life – anti-government attitudes.

The adorably dangerous Elmo is seen here friendly-fire-bombing American troops to help demonstrate actual loss, and how death can strike anywhere at any time, even “unintended” targets like children at an Afghan wedding.

Elmo helps families grieve
Elmo helps families grieve

Of course, the above image is photoshopped. The burning corpse you see in Elmo’s imagination used to be a family man “in real life,” but now he is a hero. Elmo is a well-known and respected Patriot. And he helps families grieve.

BY GIVING THEM SOMETHING TO GRIEVE ABOUT.

That’s right, he really is firebombing your loved ones! This is because Sesame Street hates America and has systematically undermined her power-hungry, Emperial nature from the very beginning by propagating messages of non-violence and “understanding,” contradicting our actions overseas, and making us look weak before China and Mother Russia, outspoken violence advocates.

“At this point,” explained Admiral Mullen of the United States Army, “they may as well sabotage our new F22 Raptors, which if you’ll look behind me are– what the fuck? ELMO, NO!

This message brought to you graciously by Lebal Drocer, Inc.
Your PREMIERE War Contractors!
Categories
Uncontrollable Patriotism

ANTI-WAR PROTEST IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

ANSWER Coalition
ANSWER Coalition

Washington, D.C.–Tomorrow, Americans will march on the White House in protest of the ongoing war occupations of Afghanistan and Iraq. Demonstrators Thursday called Bush and Obama’s wars an “illegal war for empire.”

The ANSWER coalition (Act Now to Stop War and End Racism) has been fined $7,500 for putting up signs in a move by the government that Brian Becker of the ANSWER Coalition said is “trying to limit or eviscerate or criminalize grassroots organizing itself.”

They were fined for handing out leaflets and putting up posters and signs, which the Department of Public Works has demanded the organization’s members remove.

Becker said that for eighteen months they have been targeted, accumulating between seventy and eighty thousand dollars in fines.

President of Veterans for Peace Mike Ferner said, “We will not be leaving Iraq and Afghanistan unless enough people in this country stand up.”

Organizers say the Afghanistan conflict is “Obama’s War,” just as Iraq was Bush’s war, and there is no difference between the two Presidents’ war policies.

Becker said a growing number of people oppose “the expanding war in Afghanistan, the continued occupation Afghanistan, [and] the continued occupation of Iraq.”

Cindy Sheehan, who garnered public attention in 2005 for camping outside President Bush’s ranch in Crawford, Tex. said, “Some people have abandoned the antiwar movement, have abandoned peace, since Obama’s been president. But we need to re-create a movement.”

Pondolfino of Military Families Speak Out said Thursday, “I’m the proud mother of an active-duty infantry soldier…We love and support our troops. And it is because we do that we will vocally show our opposition whenever our government sends them to ill-advised, immoral, unwinnable wars.”

Tyler Bass will report in to The Elf Wax Times via cell-phone, sending large photographs of the demonstration as it unfolds throughout the day, starting in LaFayette park across the street from the White House, and throughout the march on Washington in which tens of thousands of people are expected to participate.