America now sees what the businessmen who financed the Tea Party intended: Dressed in powdered wigs and wearing red makeup that is actually gore, the Tea Party is shoveling babies into the ocean with pitchforks. Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton is gagging Lady Liberty with her gigantic strap-on while trying to save face by praising Al-Jazeera and […]
Internet spammers seem to be on the decline, but Elf Wax turns a paranoid eye towards recent suspicious business endeavors. They’re after your money and it should be ours, dammit.
Los Angeles, Ca.–Neil deGrasse Tyson, astrophysicist and author of the popular 2007 book Death by Black Hole, confirmed the Earth is in fact doomed to survive through the routine events of December 21, 2012. The educated assurance of this world-renowned scientist is rumored by analysts to have no bearing on those who already believe the […]