Categories
Special Interest

Chronicle.su Reader Detained For Association With Website

CHRONICLE.SU RUN BY UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT
chronicle.su is a government operation.

INTERNET – Comedy fans were mortified Wednesday after learning their beloved, subversive satire news site is in fact a government operation dedicated to uncovering dissenters and information terrorists.

Documents reveal sites such as anonnews.org, #AnonOps, and chronicle.su were established as part of a plot to lure and entrap would-be radical thinkers, in a government campaign sometimes referred to as a “honey pot.”

Additionally, The Internet Chronicle is tasked with disseminating false information about chemtrail science and the Illuminati to discredit legitimate movements.

Immediately following the leak, federal agencies moved fast to stage late-night raids throughout Monday and Tuesday, targeting direct subscribers to the site.

At least one Anonymous user was detained indefinitely after posting a question at the bottom of an Internet Chronicle article asking, “Serious question – are you guys looking for writers?

American Civil Liberties Union Attorney Jim Buckerman said his Anonymous client is being unfairly accused of subversive thinking. Buckerman said his client “is not a thinker – subversive or otherwise.”

“My client is a good man. He has a family. He goes to work and he comes home. He has a beer. He watches MSNBC, and he goes to bed, dreaming of unchallenged American hegemony,” Buckerman said. “My client would not be caught dead reading The Internet Chronicle – a publication created by socialists, dope dealers – and worse.”

Buckerman said agents held his client down and asked him if he thought chronicle.su was “funny.”

“My client said in a statement that two men in suits pushed their knees into his back, holding him down on the ground. ‘Do you think Miley Cyrus is a f—— joke?’ They asked him, ‘Do you think the law doesn’t apply to you, because you’re on the Internet? Do you think chronicle.su is funny?’ to which my client responded, ‘No, no,’ and emphatically, ‘no.'”

Anyone found retweeting chronicle.su links, or suggesting The Internet Chronicle to friends may ultimately serve government interests, but that did not prevent readers from finding themselves on an “internet watch list” – which often leads to intrusive NSA backdoors, having personal emails read by secret agents, and being made fun of around the FBI office for obsessively googling “is this rash normal?”

The government released a statement Wednesday morning saying they do not comment on cybersecurity measures.

The Internet Chronicle is not the first case where the government has attempted to unearth dissent. World-renowned satirist and writer for The Onion Barrett Brown was arrested for linking people to his work with Project Persona Management, paralleling the works of Sabu, Abbie Hoffman and Jamie Jo Corne.

Security analysts project The Internet Chronicle will likely shut down or be repurposed to suit the cybersecurity needs of smaller, less digitized nations.

fucking wordpress
Categories
Editorial Hate News Technology Uncontrollable Patriotism

False-flag OpLastResort Releases Personal Information of Local Bank Employees

INTERNET — Well under 9.000 files (a paltry 4,000) representing the IP addresses, logins, and personal home addresses of small-time employees at local banks were allegedly released on Monday by “Anonymous” hackers. This information was posted on alabama.gov, along with a message claiming the data was obtained from the Federal Reserve. Some early reporting claims this information was posted on Pastebin.com. However, the only Pastebin link traded publicly by members of #OpLastResort contains only the insane rants of Aaron Bale. Anonymous also repeated the claim that they have long-term footholds in government computer systems. This release was coordinated with cooperation from advocacy journalist “Violet Blue,perhaps to beat more skeptical coverage to the punch.

We support your narrative because it is ours. Now that is quality reporting!
We support your narrative because it is ours. Now that is quality reporting!

“The hacktivist entity dropped enough technical details to make it clear that its tracks were covered and that Anonymous still had access to .gov websites,” said Violet Blue’s article published on ZDNET. Exemplary of what not to do when covering statements issued by hacking groups, the mere mention of “technical details” has reinforced an extraordinary narrative. Certainly these profoundly extraordinary claims from Anonymous require extraordinary evidence. However, this evidence is not mentioned or cited in any depth beyond this short sentence, dangling on its own mere absurd assertion. Even more, it is a dangerous and apparently unfounded endorsement of a terroristic threat designed to drain the government of resources.

This action has drawn strong comparisons to a past Anonymous operation manufactured by federal agents. “Anonymous,” led by FBI agent Sabu, hacked the open-source intelligence publication Stratfor, mischaracterizing it as a “Shadow CIA.” Using this information on Christmas eve, Sabu led “Anonymous” to target low-level journalists, raiding their bank accounts to make donations that would later be returned to the journalists after the charities were penalized.

Investigators at Chronicle.SU have been unable to find any proof that the information on 4,000 bank employees exists, as the alabama.gov website on which it was allegedly posted has since been taken offline. However, Violet Blue has reported on it (citing broken hyperlinks to alabama.gov), so therefore it must be true. Aaron Bale, spokesperson for the operation, refused to provide a link to the information for Chronicle.SU, accusing the glorious and infallible publication of cooperation with the US government, “[N]o one knows what [yo]ur talking about. At least sabu was lulzy and relevant. Fed money doesn’t buy what it used to.”

Chronicle.SU is wholly owned and operated by Lebal Drocer, Inc., a subsidiary of the United Soviet Socialist Democratic Republic of Cuthbert, Georgia, a sovereign entity and economic powerhouse leading the South to Rise Again in the name of its Dear Islamic Leader, the Loyal and Moral Raghubir Goyal.

Categories
Special Interest Technology

Lurk moar: Ryan Cleary violates bail after talking to Sabu, goes directly to jail

Ryan Cleary
Ryan Cleary was seen wearing the same clothes during his March arrest as when he was arrested last summer, but according to eyewitness reports, "looked more like a zombie this time."

LONDON — Internet snitch Ryan Cleary‘s lawyer made no attempt to defend her client’s retardation Saturday as she told chronicle.su he has been in prison since March 5 for talking to Sabu over Christmas, a violation of his bail.

Even though Sabu was, by that time, fully employed by the FBI, Ryan and a few other people who don’t read chronicle.su still thought he was on their side, and probably said some criminal-ass shit to him.

Cleary is lurking Chelmsford Prison near London.

He will go before a judge in May alongside LulzSec‘s very own Jake Davis, a.k.a. Topiary.